Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I loved him and I miss him

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Hello. I'm really upset. I loved someone but he treated me like a fool. He said he loved me too. Made serious commitments even.

I prayed to ALLAH for a change and for things to settle down. My mommy saw him even in her dream that he is a selfish and self obessed kinda person. I can't stop loving him. I want to leave everything, in fact I left everything. Unplugged myself from social interactions and to make my life peaceful that way. But I don't know I can't get over him. I miss him. I weep all day for him. What should I do? Should I contact him again? Or should I move on?

Aleeena


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7 Responses »

  1. Do not contact him. Eventually you will get over him. You think you love him but it is simply an attachment, and with time that attachment will lessen.

  2. OP: But I don't know I can't get over him. I miss him. I weep all day for him. What should I do? Should I contact him again? Or should I move on?..........I loved someone but he treated me like a fool.

    You missed an important part what happened between you 2. Did he dump you?
    I think he just loved some parts of you.

    What weeping all day is going to do for you?

    Ask your mom to help you find a good man who will not treat you like a fool.

    • It is NOT important what happened between the both of them. You don't need to know if he dumped her!!!

      • Saba: It is NOT important what happened between the both of them. You don't need to know if he dumped her!!!

        That information can help ...to see if problem is small and resolvable......if she should try to get back with him. That is how I think. I am not smart as many other readers here and want more information to decide how to give the right opinion. Have a nice day.

  3. Assalam alaikum,

    You should move on.

    Invest your time and effort into the One that Created you out of nothing. Connect with Allah swt and re-establish your relationship with your Creator as He wanted a purpose for you. Instead of wasting time, effort, thoughts, energy on someone who only wanted to fool you, put all those things towards the Allah swt.

    You will come out of this, inn shaa Allah.

    May Allah swt ease your pain and replace it with wisdom and patience, Ameen.

  4. He has been a jerk to you. You might not realize it now and make excuses for him but with time it'll all make sence. Right now your not seeing things clearly. Pray to Allah to help you move on and sharing your feelings with a trust worthy person can help you too. And when you do get better, you'll ask yourself why you wasted all your tears and emotions over him. He is the loser.

  5. Salam Alaikum Sister!

    This is just attachment. That's the reason Islam teaches social barrier to limit such things from happening, and teaches to get married as early as you can shoulder the responsibility. I have been through similar experience. But believe me you will get over it. The more you try to remember him, the more you will hurt yourself. Cut off yourself from him. Don't try to contact him. Don't even read his old messages or conversations. Try to go out with friends and family. Read more Quran and try to understand more Deen. Listen to some good lectures like Mufti Menk or Nouman Ali Khan etc. Believe me I got over it with that. And a time will come when you will realize that what you were doing by engaging with some "Na Mahram" was wrong from the start. The teachings of Quran and Islam are for our own benefits. The sooner we realize it the better.

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