Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I need a powerful wazifa for my friend

depressed woman lost love

Assalamu alaikum

My childhood friend and best friend is Sunni Muslim girl. She and her family has cheated by guy in this way, my friend has completed graduation, and she is very nice girl. From childhood onwards she is following deen. One year back a Muslim guy, and her family friend, proposed her but she didn't accept him and she said that she don't want to do haram and also marriage is her parents wish, so she has rejected him. After some days the same guy met with her parents and he said with her parents to marry their daughter. He has convinced to her parents. Finally her parents also agreed for this rishta. After approval of her parents, she and that guy made communication through phones and fb. 12 months has gone in that relation but she didn't commit for any haram relation. She daily made dua to Allah about their marriage and also daily he spoke with her parents, and the whole family trusted him. Finally that guy told to his parents that he wants to marriage her but they have not accepted, because they want more dowry. Finally he changed and he said to my friend's parents that he wants more dowry so he don't want to marry their daughter. Now my friend's family are totally depressed. Her father and mother are crying a lot for this dhoka. My friend is in very bad condition because she truly loves him. She has attempted for suicide also. I have given so many advices, encouragement but she is not able to forget him. He directly said on her face itself that he don't want to marry her because of dowry. From the last 1 year he has given more trust on the matter of the marriage. she really believed him. She is in very bad position. Please give me some suggestions how can I convince to my friend, how can I take out from that dhoka. Please tell me that guy has done right about her and her family? PLZ TELL ME POWERFUL WAZIFA TO HER.

yaallah


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5 Responses »

  1. as-salaam-u-alaikum-wr-wb..

    Well that's terrible news, and, I'm sorry your friend have to endure such a thing..

    But, that's life and crap happens..

    I believe she should not marry a man who is setting such conditions.. I understand that she's formed an attachment. But, she'll just have to give it time and eventually she'll latch off.

    Life does move on, and, hopefully she'll meet someone who's not so selfish.

    Unless she's wanting to be a living, walking bank for the Man then I think she should walk away from him.

    It's inevitable for her to be dwelling, but, with time wounds heal.

    All the above is opinionated. So, I would promote Istikhara as I believe it's far more authentic in terms of guidance.

  2. walaikum asalaam

    first of all no such thing as wazifa. where do you get this from. in Islam the guy gives the woman dowry not the other way around, so its best to leave him, plus his family seems like a gold digger.

    tell your friend, so many good guys around who know their deen, and that's the type you should seek, not the ones who follow culture . in due time broken heart will heal.

    suicide is not a solution, has she thought what would happen on the other side? life is so precious, and so many people are willing to give that up for one lousy guy. is that what your life mounts up to be.

    tell her to be patient and pray to Allah. she is not alone.

    peace

  3. Isn't it very obvious that man who demanded more dowry has shown his true color - greed and shameless!! He has no integrity of being a decent man for asking money from the woman's family.. As the post above mentioned, the dowry is paid by the man's family to the woman's family. Even if this is your country's culture, his action says it all about him.

    Tell your friend that she should be happy and grateful to escape from such a man. Be patient, there is no need to rush or showing desperation in marriage especially if the potential partner is not an ideal one. Trust Allah prepares the best for her. Nothing you can do if she is stubborn to the level to commit suicide. Move on.

  4. Assalaamu Alaykum,

    Personally I don't see this boy as greedy. I think he is really interested in marrying this sister, but because of the cultural constraints he's been put under and the demands of his parents, he is trying to find the easiest route to do it. Just come up with more dowry money like his mom and dad are asking, and they can go on and live happily ever after.

    Sister, this is not Islamic though. Men are supposed to give dowry, not demand one. He should be hustling to come up with a dowry to offer your friend. Further, it doesn't matter what his parents want. As a man, he ultimately decides who he marries. He doesn't need a wali, or someone else's permission (like a woman does). He can actually reject his parent's position and go ahead with the marriage, especially since they don't seem to have a valid reason for what they want.

    I think you need to inform your friend that her parents need to be educated on the proper protocols of islamic marriage. If they can get a firm grasp on what is needed and what is not, then they can tell this young man what his rights are and the marriage can still go forward. There is no need to get all depressed and fatalistic when things aren't following proper islam to begin with. Once things are put in right order, it can go more smoothly in shaa Allah, and the young couple can have the happy life they want in the end.

    -Amy
    IslamicAnswers.com Editor

    • This is true the cultural pressures.

      When I was entertaining proposals back in the day, I particularly told my parents I will not marry into a family that asks for any sort of dowry. In my opinion if they did not know the preliminary rights of a woman in Islam, then they would not know much more. The marriage would be governed by culture not Islam. In Islam the MAN should be scrambling for dowry. And also the woman makes the demands not the man. For instance she can ask for him to promise her hajj, or Islamic knowledge. It doesn't even have to be materialistic!

      Tell your friend to research her deen. She is better off w/o this family because he will never leave them and has shown that they will have a huge impact on his opinions and decisions after marriage.

      Remind her a man and love are not reasons to end your life but an opportunity to meet someone better suited for her. Also, it's a chance to grow closer to Allah.

      Tell her to make istikharrah and it should comfort her soul to do so.

      Salaams

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