Islamic marriage advice and family advice

How to improve concentration in prayer and avoid zina

Man in prayer

Assalamu alaykum, I am 18 year old . Recently I have been facing lot of problems with my self , I am sure scholars here would give me some valuable advice..

1) I cannot concentrate on my namaaz... (prayer). I have thoughts and things going in my mind when I am offering my namaaz...I want to ask what should I do so that I can concentrate on my namaaz.

2) Since girls all over the world wear shorter clothes...what should I do to avoid or in case I have any bad thought about that girl..

3) We all know zina has very severe punishment from Allah....I want to ask what are the consequences if u give a hug to a non-mahraam...what are the punishments for that and how to correct it...

khuda hafiz

-usman alvi

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15 Responses »

  1. Assalam-Alaekum Usman,
    I am not scholar, just a reader on this site.

    1- For concentration in Salah it takes time and energy to do that. It helps a lot if you know the meaning of what you are saying in Salah. If you are an arabic speaker then you know what you are saying. But it also helps me a lot if I know the context in which the surah came to prophet(s.a.w.). Because then it can help one's mind to relate to it. As far as Surah Al-Fatiha is concerned its AWESOME! see its meanings and if you can truly follow what you are claiming in this surah, while standing in front of Allah(s.w.t.) then you are better than me.

    2- Don't look at them. As simple as that. Bring down your sight. Although there is a hadith about not looking the second time. But its when you look the first time ACCIDENTALLY. But its not recommended to look at first time even. When walking not necessarily look down, but while looking straight you can estimate that someone is coming, and if your estimate says that its a lady then don't look. Although this sometimes bites back when you cross someone you know. But I think it has more benefits.

    3- Brother if you have given a hug to someone(non mahram), then repent from it. All of us make mistakes. But do not get bogged down by a single mistake. Allah is forgiving. To correct it, repent and ask forgiveness from Allah(s.w.t.) and don't do it again. It is as simple.

    May Allah guide us and help us all.


  2. As salamu alaykum Usman,

    I am not a scholar either and I agree with everything that Concerned has told you.

    I have gathered some information and have adapted to you, this can be helpful for you, insha´Allah.

    Recognise and Repent

    All humans commit sins no matter how hard we try to avoid them. Engaging in evil deeds decreases our Iman. Bad or wrong actions, take a toll on the human heart which makes us more susceptible to being lead astray from the Path of Allah . It is important for us to reflect upon our deeds and weed out the ones that are contrary to the teachings of the Holy Qur’an and Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad . Allah has gifted us with an innate sense of justice and the ability to reason and make sound judgements. Our fitrah (natural disposition) necessitates that we all know when we are committing a sin. And if we don’t know, we certainly have a bevy of resources to find out from!


    Completing the five daily prayers, on time and according to the Sunnah, is an excellent way to increase our Iman, as I am sure you know. Not only are we performing an obligatory deed when praying, but by doing so we have a standing audience with the Creator of this world where we can ask for help and mercy. The effect of the salah on the human soul is cooling as Muhammad once said that it cooled his eyes. The salah connects us with our Creator and, along with obedience to Allah , helps us to enjoin what is good and forbid what is evil.

    Allah Almighty says in the Holy Qur’an:

    “The believers are only those who, when Allah is mentioned, feel a fear in their hearts and when His Verses -this Qur’an- are recited unto them, they (i.e. the Verses) increase their Faith; and they put their trust in their Lord (Alone); Who perform salah and spend out of that We have provided them. It is they who are the believers in truth. For them are grades of dignity with their Lord, and Forgiveness and a generous provision (Paradise)” (Qur’an 8:2-4).

    Qur’anic Recitations

    Medical studies have shown that simply listening to a recitation of the Holy Qur’an has a physiological effect on our bodies. Research has also proven that the Qur’an has healing qualities on the body, mind and spirit. What better way to increase your Iman than to listen to a recitation of the Holy Qur’an on an audio device! Listen to the melodious rhythm of the Qur’an and while doing so try to reflect upon the meanings of what you are listening to.

    Engage in Dhikr

    “…Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.” (Qur’an 13:28).
    Remembering Allah much through acts of dhikr brings peace to the heart. It also gives us a sense of taqwa, a consciousness that makes us realise that Allah Almighty is ever near and that we should always strive to please Him.

    Some beneficial dhikr include:

    Subhan’Allah – ‘Praise be to Allah’
    Al-Hamdullilah – ‘Thanks be to Allah’
    Allahu Akbar – ‘Allah is the Greatest.’

    Carry Out Good Deeds

    Doing good deeds for others can be like switching on a light bulb in a darkened room. No matter how awful we are feeling there is just something about offering a helping hand to someone in need that lifts our spirits and brightens our Iman.

    Allah Almighty says in the Holy Qur’an:

    “For those who believe and work righteous deeds is a reward that will never fail” (Qur’an 41:8).
    Types of good deeds that any of us can fulfill include acts of dawah, feeding a poor person or donating something of value to charity. Not only does the deed benefit another person but it also benefits our own souls by polishing up our Iman.

    Trust in Allah

    The best way to increase your Iman is to completely submit your will to Allah by following every command in the Qur’an and Sunnah. Live your life according to them and you will find success around every corner. Turn to Allah in times of distress and be thankful to Allah in times of bounty. Have patience in Allah’s Decree and always remember that no matter what trials or tribulations we face in this World, one day we will be called to account for our deeds which were hopefully sent forth with much goodness and patience.

    I would add in your case as a young man to take care of your body, eating properly, exercising( exercises where you can have discipline and joy at the same time), and practicing simple exercises of relaxation too, this will help your concentration too, insha´Allah.

    A way to avoid zina could be too to prepare yourself for your marriage, as a husband, you will be, insha´Allah, the Iman of your home then you have a responsibility with your future family related to your way of being and your knowledge, insha´Allah. This way you will be preparing yourself insha´Allah to have a spouse that would appreciate all those qualities in you as a straight muslim man, insha´Allah.

    When we say "Audhu billahi minash shaytanii Rajeem" at the begining of Al-Fatihah, it is to keep our concentration in salah and don´t be distracted by any whispers, Allah(swt) is All- Hearing and All-Knowing.

    “And who is better in speech than one who invites to Allah and does righteousness and says, ‘Indeed, I am of the Muslims.’ And not equal are the good deed and the bad. Repel [evil] by that [deed] which is better; and thereupon the one whom between you and him is enmity [will become] as though he was a devoted friend.” (Qur’an, 41:33-34)

    But none is granted it except those who are patient, and none is granted it except one having a great portion [of good]” (Qur’an, 41:35).

    “And if there comes to you from Satan an evil suggestion, then seek refuge in Allah. Indeed, He is the Hearing, the Knowing.” (Qur’an, 41:36)

    Ibn Al Qayyim said that it is narrated that when we commence the prayer, Allah orders for the barrier between us to be lifted and we are directly facing our Lord, yet if we turn away (i.e. get distracted) the barrier is brought back down. And it is in these moments of heedlessness that the shaytan tries to make one thought lead to another but when the barrier is removed, shaytan does not dare to distract us.
    Thus, let us seek refuge in Allah from the shaytan, truly think over the meaning of that supplication, and guard ourselves from shaytan throughout the prayer.

    Allah(swt) knows best.

    All my Unconditional Respect,

    María Editor

    • i have tried a lot but today after a month i commit a zina with my hand mean hand practise....i cant control on my self i have lost my control on me which ever girl i look my mind goes in wrong path plz help me how to control on it..sometimes i think that i should relax myself by doing zinah single time but thn i think about my family which will get punishment of my sin what to do

  3. To improve the concentration and focus on prayer, one needs to take three steps:

    Step 1. Preparation for prayer: Before we go to university, we prepare. Before we go to work, we spend at least one hour to prepare for it. However, when it comes to salah, most of the times we do not take any preparation. There is a reason why iqamah is given about half an hour after the adhan. This half an hour is a chance for us to prepare for our salah. Human minds are not machine. Our minds simply can't make an abrupt jump from one state to another state. Suppose I am watching a cricket match. I muted my computer during adhan, and then continued watching cricket for 20 more minutes. Simply five minutes before iqamah, I make a quick wudhu, and then start my prayer. Will my heart be filled with remembered of Allah in salah, or would it be still filled with cricket during the prayer? It will be filled with cricket.

    Therefore, a best preparation for salah would be like this. Make wudu 10 minutes before adhan. Walk to mosque thinking about Allah. When muezzing gives adhan, reply to it. Then pray two units of salah of entering the mosque. Then pray the sunnah prayers, if there are any. Then make dua to Allah so that He help you to really focus on your salah.

    Step 2. Learn the fiqh of salah: It is every important that you learn the fiqh of salah. Find a good book and learn about them.

    Step 3. Learn the meaning of surah fatiha and other adhkars that we say in salah.

    Also read this small book: 33 ways of developing khushu in salah.

    You can also read this beautiful salah series by Jinan Bastaki. It helped me a lot.

    To stay away from the trail of zina, I cannot offer you much constructive advice, since I also find girls to be my greatest trial. If I ever go to market, or a place where you can actually see women if half-naked or revealing dresses, the stability of my heart is greatly disturbed. When I put myself in such situations, I find that I have herd time concentrating on salah.

    Marriage may be that solution, but it is greatly recommended by the Messenger of Allah that we should marry when we are psychologically and financially ready.

    In the meantime however, no matter how great the temptation is, there can be no excuse for zina or any other sin related to it. If Allah tests someone, and the slave can come out victorious, the reward is great.

    I personally always pray to Allah to not test me by the trial of opposite gender. If something makes us vulnerable to sin, it is mandatory for us that we stay away from that situation or environment. In my case, it is mandatory that I stay way from places of tabarruj as much as I can. Alhamdulillah, I have a workplace that is men only.

    Since there is no excuse for sin, and if you feel that you may commit sin, it is mandatory that you marry or find a boys only university. We are even instructed by Allah to migrate if we need. Allah said:

    Indeed, those whom the angels take [in death] while wronging themselves - [the angels] will say, "In what [condition] were you?" They will say, "We were oppressed in the land." The angels will say, "Was not the earth of Allah spacious [enough] for you to emigrate therein?" For those, their refuge is Hell - and evil it is as a destination. [4:97]

  4. Assalaamu'alaikum Wa Rahmatoullaahi Wa Barakaatuh

    I'm writing becoz i'm impress from someone's comment...i have seen her comments in other Topics discussed and Alhamdulillah...oki...she is doing Good...nice!!!

    I'll not talk about my feelings but if she is married...then its not good for her, really. Please ask for information about this muslim sister ull see its not good. If u r married how may i feel something for ya...its not Halal.

    u should not even come to my mind...even not married.

    Oki the way u need to make alot of Zikr...specially reading Qur'aan with translation would be better...
    Check constantly your Intention for whom u r doing this, is it for Allah Ta'ala or not (Sincerity)

    Oki Take Care


  5. assalam o alikm usman alvi

    i cnt give u any kind of advice bcz me to suffring frm tha-esec i observe tht if i pray 4.5 times a day specilly fajar nd asr i feel tht i protect my self frm many sins.we r humans nd made many sins however ALLAH is forgiver inshallah we wil forgive bt almays belive in the blessing of ALLAH we will save our selves.

    if u want to avoid frm girls jst dnt put sight on them nd dnt give them any response .....

    zina is rapidly moving in the world we jst pray to
    ALLAH to save us.put disciplene in ur personality u wil be saved

    allah hafiz

  6. i am also looking for a solution to the same issue. it is not just the young and unmarried men effected by it. it actually affects older men and women too.

    salah, zikr and protecting ur eyes and not looking at women helps. but nothing really eliminates the occasional intense urges.

    we r humans and this world is a place of imtihaan and probably one of the hardest test is to control this urge. that is probably why it is a virtue to be with your wife and Allah subhantalla gives sawab for it.

    apart from the traditional remedies which everyone has mentioned i think discussing this issue with a trusted one and not just suppressing it helps relieve some of the stress and can be useful. I am trying to be honest with myself to acknowledge that i have a problem and discuss it with a trusted friend or a open minded religious scholar. we all accept that it is haram and no two ways about it, but it would be very naive to say that all this is enough. lot of our brothers unfortunately are unable to resist and fall prey to the temptations.

    lets pray that Allah protects us all from these and other sins. amen

  7. assalaam o alikum my brothers and sisters

    your comments make me very happy and a good inspirtaion.......i have commited zina with many girls...please pray for me that Allah forgive my sins and protect me from commiting zina.......

  8. assalamualaikum
    guys i m 18 years old nd i m vry mch addicted to zina (masturbation) i m not getting a way to get rid of this . also i cant marry at this age my parents will not allow me and the steps mentioned above are not helping me . it has become a habbit of me to do it evrynight because of which i m geting weaker nad weaker day by day so please guys tel me a way to get rid of this ridiculous problem

  9. seriously i am one of d victims too..Whenever i commit zina wit my girlfriend i feel bad and the reason is dhat i am a graduate and i have no job yet i assumed dhats what is pushing me into dhis...been idleness can give room for zina and i believ hard prayer n taking much time to think about Allah wil surely save dhis.for sure d world is in mess...d social media n porns spoiled it all for young n old..may Allah help us

    • Salam brother. May Allah help you with your intentions. This is the good sign of belief that your seeking. A mustard seed of belief is enough for Allah blessing and forgiveness. Say Isthigfaar in every available chance. For concentration pray like this is the last one.

  10. AoA. We've started a new YouTube channel to address this very issue of making it easy to learn what we are reciting in Salah/Namaz. Check it out here iA

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