Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Is it OK to share a car home with a male?

Asslamu Alikum Warhamthallahi Wrbkathuhu,
I have been living a normal life as many so called Muslims are doing now. But from some months I have changed a lot. I have started wearing hijab, stopped doing things what I am not supposed to do as a Muslim. But I had a boyfriend, I love him so much. Both of our families know about us. We are about to get married in some months Insha Allah. But now before marriage we have stopped meeting each other after I have start wearing Hijab.

We live in  same area. As I don't have a personal car and its feels unsafe sometime in the crowd of street or bus, I want to know If i come home with him everyday it would be very sinful or not?? (When I'm already in love with him and we are waiting to get married)

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2 Responses »

  1. ishrat_i, Walaykumsalaam,

    Yes, it is haraam for you to sit alone in the car with this man since he is non mahram to you. I also believe you are asking for trouble by sitting alone with him, especially since you have feelings for him. One glance can easily lead to more.

    If it is unsafe, perhaps you could get a 'registered taxi' home. In most cases, the taxi driver here will be male too, but atleast you won't have feelings for him and as its a registered taxi, it'll be safe. Better still, get someone from home to pick you. Or the best solution, ask you parents to do your nikah with this man straightaway and have the party later as planned. Alot of people are doing that these days and it makes absolute sense.

    The Prophet (saw) said to Aisha (ra), "O 'Aishah, abstain from the sins which are looked upon as trivial, for they too will be enquired about by Allah." (Ahmad)

    Also another saying, "Beware of minor sins, for they will gather together on man so much so that they will kill him." (Ahmad)

    And remember Allah(swt) warns us: "And come not NEAR to the unlawful sexual intercourse. Verily, it is a Fahishah [i.e. anything that transgresses its limits (a great sin)], and an evil way (that leads one to Hell unless Allah forgives him)." (Surah Al-Isra,Verse 32)

    SisterZ Editor

  2. Walaikumsalaam, your question was answered in the brackets at the end, before marriage love does not exist, it is lust disguised by shaytan, only through marriage will one feel love and this will be like no other feeling, so while he is your 'boyfriend' stay away from him, your hearts desires are influenced by shaytan, and even the most strongest of people have fallen for the shaytans deception, so to refrain from this lust, keep away from him until after marriage, in fact i would agree with sisterZ in that you should do your nikah now, it will solve everything easily, the party/celebration can take place in a few months as planned, however if you choose to wait then i would recommend you ask a family member to pick/drop you to wherever.

    You have already made a commitment by wearing the hijab and stopping contact, so this should not be hard for you, and look at it this way, in a few months you can come home with him everyday and do as you wish, then he will be halal to you as your husband inshaAllah.

    All the best

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