Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Is my marriage to my ex’s brother acceptable?

Salams,

I am a Muslim girl who always has tried to be a good person. However, I also have fallen in the traps of shaitan many times. My dilemma is that while I was very young, I was dating this boy. I only saw him for two weeks and then I stopped seeing him.

Many years later I got a proposal from his elder brother and by not thinking anything else, I accepted the proposal. I have not mentioned anything to my fiance about his brother. I do not think anything of what I had with the brother because I feel it was nothing serious. The brother seems to be fine me accepting the proposal.

However, I truly and honestly love my fiance and have never looked upon anyone else. Only Allah swt knows how much I love my fiance. My question is, Islamically will my marriage to my fiance be accepted? I have not told anything to my fiance because I think whatever happened with his brother was many years ago and it wasnt even a serious relationship.

Please tell me if it will be haram to marry my fiance. Jazakallah khair.


Tagged as: , , , , ,

6 Responses »

  1. Walikum assalaam wa rahmatullah sister,

    Alhamdulillah you have repented and the past is the past now...you are not obliged to tell your fiance anything and to answer ur question...It is perfecty halaal for you to marry your fiance. A muslim should not disclose his/her past sins which Allah has covered for him/her.

    There is nothing haraam in that despite you seeing his brother before. In fact, a muslim woman is allowed to marry a man who used to be his brother in law once...that is to say if she was married to a man and they divorced, after that she can marry his brother, that would be halaal.
    It is due to this reason that brother in law is not deemed as a Mahram and full Hijab must be obvserved infront of him as he is someon who 'can' be a potential spouse in ur life.

    Was salaam

  2. If ever the younger brother speaks and tells the elder brother, let us hope he doesn't, this may get very messy. It would have been better to avoid marrying the elder brother, because men also get jealous and whether anything serious happened or not, if he finds out he will not be pleased.

    I don't know what to advise, cause on one hand you both are happy, but on the other hand, if your husband to be were to find out, anarchy could follow.

  3. Salaams

    If you do love your fiance, then you should marry him, but try not to disclose your past to your husband. He most probably would get very jealous and this could affect your relationship in the future.

    Even if he does find out from the brother, your relationship was only for two weeks. You barely even knew him.

    Rumaysa

  4. Salaam sister,

    in my humble opinion I would advise you to tell all to your fiance first before marrying him. As you have said, it was only for 2 weeks and it was nothing serious, there is no need to hide anything. Because if you do so and Allah forbids, your fiance gets to know it later, he will not trust you that there was nothing serious. Instead he will create unnecesary doubts in his head and will ask lots of questions why you had to hide. So I believe that to avoid problems,its better to tell him now.
    very often in these situations, we find that the other persons says that it would have been easier if it was said before...atleast then your fiance will see your truthfulness, your sincerity...

    What i can advise you is to look for a good occasion, an approprate occasion when you are with him to tell him. Tell him in such a way that he feel for himself that really there was nothing...tell him you were just frds and nothing really bad hapened...i mean you are in a better position to explain him.

    i believe it is better if you tell him now YOURSELF...who knows if the little bro goes and tell him...then your fiance will think negatively only.

    Make two rakaat namaz nafil before you intend to talk to your fiance about and ask Allah to make you successful, to give you the courage to tell him, to give him the understanding, the maturity to understand you, pray to Allah that he doesnt take it badly....Sis, ,very often when im in difficult situation, or need to face a terrible situation, i pray 2 rakaat nafil namaz with the intention of having Allah's blessings to make my task easy, bearable and succesful.

    InshAllah, you and your fiance shall be happy and may you have a lasting and happy marriage by Allah's grace.

    Naju

  5. Totally agree with Naju's reply if you tell your finance before you marrying him this will be better for you as your husband to be will trust you, less likely to think what else you hiding and more likely to protect you from his brother and put him in his place and love you for your honestly.

Leave a Response