Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Istikhara about Marriage


I got engaged to marry a guy last December 2013. Our parents have met and both enjoyed each others company. After getting engaged I got sick in January 2014 lasting until mid March. Then the cold got better. However, after this in March 2014 I got sick and doctors were not sure what it is. The illness is not fatal Alhumdullilah but it is very frustrating to have and others not know what it is. It has almost been 1 year now and this illness has not gone away.

Also, during June 2014, a big fight happened between both our families. The matter got sorted. There is still some negative feelings on both sides and communication between both parties has decreased significantly. The boy and I still want to get married and are very fond of each other.

After this fight, I did an isthikhara. The first time I was not sure about what my dream meant. It was me driving at night and there was a white animal with me. I was not sure if this was positive or negative. I did the Isthikhara again and this time I saw a family member crying. I thought this was a negative isthikhara then.

I have known this guy for 3 years and we were good friends. My family also knew him and liked him. We both wanted to get married after knowing each other just a couple months but we waited to get our family involved until we were done college.

The guy is Muslim, Sunni and he is just as religious as I am. He does not engage in haram activities, does not drink, does not smoke and does not have bad habits. We have known each other for so long and I am very comfortable with him. He is very caring towards me through my illness also and makes dua for me.

I found that I got sick after our engagement. My isthikhara also came negative I think. Do you think these are both related? I am very biased though as I really want to marry this guy but I am also very frustrated with my illness and want it to get healed so I am not sure if I am making an incorrect correlation.

Thank you for any advice.

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3 Responses »

  1. Salaam Sister,

    Istikhara has nothing to do with dreams. The only reason your dreams appear negative is because of all the negatives around marriage i.e your illness and arguments.

    Istikhara is for Allah to guide you towards good and keep you away from bad by putting obstacles in your way, If your heart still feels at ease about marrying this man then carry on and Allah with bless yous with a pious Marriage Insha'Allah.

    As always keep making du'a. And Allah Knows best.

    May Allah bless you with a Pious and Beautiful Marriage...Ameen!

  2. Assalam Alaikum.
    Thats almost my situation. I didn't get sick but there are a lot of negative vibes from both the families. My father has called of my engagement too because he thinks i will never be happy with that guy because of negative istkhara and his family is not so comforting too.
    Yet, i want to marry him because we love each other. I am in a whirlpool too.

    Did your parents performed istkhara? what do they say about this relation and your sickness.

    May Allah help us both in making the right decision. Ameen.

  3. Where have u gone?don't u need help? Answers of ur questions will help me too.

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