Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Lost for Love

Love for Allah's sake


I am writing this post after contemplating for a few days and would like to know an outsiders opinion.

I'm a young girl not far off from hitting the mid 20's, I've been wanting to get married for the past few years but its come to my attention that I don't really know what people are after these days

I'm a modest muslim girl who has the best of both western and eastern values, I've come across so many potentials who show interest in me, shower me with compliments but don't want to marry me? Most of them end with saying 'you'll make the perfect wife all the best' I don't understand, if that was the case why wouldn't they want to pursue things?

I'm far from beautiful, just an average girl with average build, however I do get compliments of which I don't deserve. I 'tick' most the boxes they look for but I still don't get why I've not made it to marriage yet, as the process is so disheartening. Yes, I've not pursued certain proposals but 7/10 the men do not want to commit to me. I'm as pure as anything, I've lost the will to search and search.. ive been searching for 3 years nearly and i'm sick of being hurt.

Am I Cursed? Will I ever get married? Should I quit looking? What advice would you give to a sister who is somewhat desperate to have a better half in marriage but keeps getting the pain of rejection.. 🙁



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5 Responses »

  1. WA alaikum assallam my most sweet siso

    Firstly I would like to tell don't ever let Shetan mislead u from the path of Allah and his mercy on us. indeed Allah best creation is human being and even Allah said I have created human being with the best moulds no doubt Allah has made few rich few poor few white so few black or average but recall what our beloved prophet said never see the rich people but c lowest people then u what if u are Average,look the people who has no eyes,legs hand or poor don't u feel to say Allhamdulilah. whatever look u are having is being given by ur lord Allah and u should be happy in that sweetheart it is u what u are its ur own personality u should be unique in ur own way so be confident and happy what Allah has given u

    and the point abt ur marriage is ohhhhhhhhh my dear don't think so bla bla shit m I cursed Astagfirullah honey ur just a 20 co'mmon sis don't feel so much alone and sad u c what is the main target of muslimah in ds earth to worship Allah and gain the love of him and remeber no one love is true love everyone will hurt u even if it is ur husband so don't be back of that relation look around u their are many people who are of 40 or 50 didn't get married their are many people who are married but didn't set their married life good look I don't mean nauzbillah that just be without marriag what I mean is work hard and don't be sad thinking will I get married or not in shaa Allah when the right time will come sure u will get married Allah has set a time for every one might be Allah want u to give u the best or might anyone good or wanna c ur pateince or Allah want u to be close to Him or might Allah put some people in trial or in test bcoz Allah says in Quran that u think u believe and we test u not ?so don't lose hope Allah is always with the pateinc one and for marriage read quranic duvas and just work hard on it try to read tahajud sallah and ask Allah for it in shaa Allah u will find a way but sweety don't lose hope and Wd the mercy of Allah be confident in Allah love

    No love is true then the love between Allah and his humble slave

    May Allah help u and give u the best of the best men in da world ameen

    Swety smile it's sunnah


  2. Asalaam Walaikum Sister. A lot of us have been through the struggle of thinking we wont get married but Alhamdulillah in the end it all works out and if it doesnt then we have to accept its a test from Allah. But most importantly have true faith and yaqeen that Allah has and will do whats best for you whether you see it or not.

    This is what being a Muslim is ... Complete faith when things are going good and especially when things seem hard. Marriage is big so dont haste into jumping into marriage just because someone has accepted you and at the same time dont dwell on why you have had rejections look at them as blessings Allah has protected you from something you dont see or cant see. Also make sure you pray Istikhara before meetings etc.

    May Allah make it easy on you and bless you with a beautiful pious husband Ameen!

    And remember my suster we can plan and dream all we want but Allah is the best of Planners and his plan is final.

  3. assalamualaikum talk to your male relatives that you want to get married, and make dua for Allah to give you a good husband, trust me your not the only one, there are many going through the same thing. May Allah make marriage easy for you and bless you with a good husband Ameen. And may Allah bless you and your love ones a good life in this and the next Ameen and your husband ameen.

  4. salam sister your just a young pup. If your horny i can understand.Let me say that i waited and waited for 11 yrs till i found or Allah found my partner that i have asked for .She just finished her Alima program and i was lucky or blessed with 10yr younger wife .Anyways my advice is if you havent done so.....Build on your career be independant ....but most of Halaal build on your is said how you are is a reflection of your partner.....soooo if your not praying you wont go very gar in life ....Be prepared...?

  5. Dear Sister

    I am a married person and looked for following qualities in my female partner.
    (i) An average look. (ii) Decent behavior and talk (iii) Healthy and fit (iv) Having an ambition in life
    Thanks to Allah that i discovered such person and am living happily with her.

    What you lack in look can easily compensated by having a ambition in life like serving society in manageable way for e.g. teaching, social worker or a simple religious teacher in your area mentoring neighboring woman. It will give you a sense of purpose in life and man really appreciate such woman.

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