Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Lying to parents…

Lies, telling lies, lying

What if marriage was made by a boy telling lie to boy's parents that the girl was not married before, her kids were shown as her nephews, but afterwards parents come to know that the girl was married & these are her kids. They now enforce boy to divorce her and marry any other girl. What should the boy do now?

Did he do wrong by lying initially? But he thought at that time if he tells truth before marriage, the parents would not have been agree for marriage so he lied, his intention was to support that girl & her children as it was Sunnat. Now whether that boy liable? What should he do now?


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3 Responses »

  1. That boy should tell his parents he knew everything about the kids and he lied to get married.

    • AsSalaamu 'alaikum,

      According to Islam, the boy didn't need his parent's permission to marry the girl. Therefore lying to his parents made no sense, unless if they were the source of his financial support--even if that was the case, he should have said the truth and stood firmly on his position. What happened was between him and his parents, and his wife can't be at blame, or be divorced for that.

      Now that he is already married to the girl, it would be wrong to obey his parents in divorcing her, because doing so (in the sight of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala) would be worse than lying to his parents. Therefore he should keep his wife and children for the sake of Allah, and fight for them. He should know that, the Prophet (sallallahu 'alaihi wasallam) strictly warned men in his last speeches to be careful about the way they treat their wives, because they became lawful for them in the name of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. This means that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala is watching what the men will do with their wives--will they divorce them because their parents said so, or would they keep them and treat them nicely for the sake of Allah?

      So let the boy decide. Does he want to divorce his wife to please his parents, and make Allah angry? Or does he want to keep his wife to please Allah, and make his parents angry? I am sure that if he isn't actually interested in divorcing his wife, then he will know the right thing to do.

      This is in support of what Brother SVS mentioned above, and what is mentioned below by sister Midnightmoon.

  2. Assalaamualaikam

    What's done is done. Yes, the guy was wrong to lie to his parents. But divorcing his wife now isn't going to change what happened. He has made a commitment to his wife when they did nikah - he should honour this.

    Both he and his wife should try to make amends for any lies that were told. InshaAllah his parents may come to accept their marriage in time.

    Midnightmoon editor

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