Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Marriage of an Infertile Man

Male infertility disorder

As salamu alikum

I come to know that as per medical science I will never be able to be a father. Now I want to get married. My question is, Should I tell the women before marriage that I'm a infertile? Want to know as per Quran & Hadith.

Mdnz.


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9 Responses »

  1. assalamu alaikum

    brother your sense of honesty and compassion for another should compel you to tell a person that would marry you to want to know if you can have children or not..are you serious? that is almost like dishonesty if you didnt. A reason a major one, for marriage is to bear children. So if the quran and hadiths dont SPECIFICALLY say it, you wouldnt feel it is the right thing to do?

    You should of course or may end up divorced.

  2. Salaams,

    I am curious as to how you are certain of your infertility. If you've never been married, I would imagine you have never tried to conceive a child. Trying to conceive and failing is the usual way someone comes to suspect they are infertile. Do you have some condition from birth that prevents you from being able to ejaculate at all? If you produce any sperm at all, no matter how little, there is still a chance for conception although statistically the odds might be against you. But Allah doesn't always deal in statistics 🙂

    -Amy
    IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  3. If you think you are infertile, seek a cure for it brother. Medical science is not the final word. The final word belongs to Allah SWT and He alone can cure you. Please research Tibb-e-Nabawi (first and foremost), Traditional Chinese Medicine, Ayurveda etc. Also perform hijama. Please google hijama and read about the ahadith regarding it and the benefits. May Allah cure you. In my opinion, I think the woman should eventually know some time before the Nikah that you may be infertile. However, don't give up seeking a cure.

    Ibn 'Abbas reports: "'Umar ibn al-Khattab went to Al-Sham (Syria). When he reached Sargh, the army commanders, Abu Obaidah ibn al-Jarrah, and others received him. They informed him that a plague had broken out in Al-Sham."Ibn Abbas continued, "'Umar assembled the leaders from among the Muhajirin and sought their opinions. They offered conflicting opinions. Some said: 'We have come for a certain objective, and so we should not turn back from it.' Others said: 'With you are others, including some companions of the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him. We do not believe that you should expose them to this plague.' 'Umar said: 'You may leave.'Then he gathered together the Ansar and asked their opinion. They were unanimous in their advice to him. They said: 'We believe that you should return with the people and you should not expose them to the plague.' Then 'Umar addressed the people, announced that he was going back the next morning, and asked them to be prepared to leave in the morning. ' At this Abu Ubaidah ibn al-Jarrah said: 'O 'Umar! Are you running away from the decree of Allah!' 'Umar replied: 'O Abu Ubaidah! I wish someone else had said this. Yes, we do run from the decree of Allah to the decree of Allah. What if you had a herd of camels and you took them to a valley that had two slopes, one green pasturage and the other dry and barren. Would you not be fulfilling the decree of Allah if you let your herd graze on the green pasture rather than keeping them on the dry barren land?' Just then came Abdurrahman ibn 'Awf. He had been away on some errand. He said: 'I have some knowledge concerning this issue. I heard the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, say: "If you hear that an epidemic has broken out in a land, do not approach it. If it attacks a land where you live, then do not leave that land in a bid to escape from it".' Hearing this 'Umar praised Allah and then he departed. This is reported by Bukhari.

    The point being we should seek the best decree of Allah SWT. May Allah help us and relieve our difficulties. Ameen.

  4. You should definitely tell a prospective spouse that you are medically infertile. It will be up to her to decide if she wants to take a chance in the hope that medical science may prove you wrong.

    • There are also women who would be fine with an infertile spouse. For various reasons, a woman may not want children or would be happy to adopt. She may also know that she is infertile herself. The bottom line, though, is that you must tell a prospective spouse your situation. I know an infertile couple who just adopted a beautiful baby boy after seven years of trying to conceive on their own, and they are very happy.

  5. Assalaamualaikam

    If you have been told you are infertile, that does not necessarily mean you can never be a father. Many causes of reduced fertility can be treated, and there are medical options for assisted fertilisation (although I would always advise somebody considering these to discuss the issue with a scholar first). If a doctor has told you you will never be a father, try to get a second opinion.

    As well as medical treatment, place your trust and faith in Allah, and ask him for help.

    With regards telling a potential spouse, I feel it is very important to do so. Communication is crucial to a successful relationship, and if the two of you wish children, you may need medical help with this; you both would need each other's support. The right woman for you will not reject you but will stand by you and support you.

    Midnightmoon
    IslamicAnswers.com editor

  6. salam

    yes brother you are obliged according to the shariah to declare such a condition if it is known to you before you make the nikah - which in this case it is.

    the sole purpose of marriage is not to produce chidlren, although in Islam there is no other contract to reproduce other than marriage.

    The Koran says that wives and husbands are garments for each other, partners, supporters (forgive me i do not remember the ayah numbers etc - please do your research), so marriage is for more than merely producing children. However most women will naturally want to have babies once they marry.

    You may consider marrying a lady who has already children and would be content to not have more.

    hope that helps

    please make research yourself of this matter - short answer: you must declare this infertility otherwise if hidden it invalidates the contract of nikah should the woman demand a divorce later on the basis that you hid from her this fact and that she wants children.

    salam

  7. Yes, tell any prospective spouse that you are possibly infertile.

    Also, perhaps marry a woman who already has children if you feel that you want to be a father.

    Insha Allah khayr

  8. My Husband intentionally hide's about his infertility problem before Marriage as he know very well. Now what should i do, what Islam says about this.As i am very much stressed some time but i still love my husband. If i want to stay with him by doing this i am wrong?

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