Islamic marriage advice and family advice

How long do you wait before marriage after death of parent/family member


Please would you advise me on the following question:

I have met someone who I would like to marry InshAllah. Our family have been involved and are aware. The difficult situation is that i am being told that I can't get married because my mother passed away in October 2009. I have been told that I had to get married in the first 12 months after my mother passed away or after 3 years.
I have been thinking and before i was born my sister passed away. Back then they said the same to my brother therefore my brother rushed and got married within a year. I thought the rush was because my sister had passed away and my mum wanted a girl in the house but now I'm being told it's because of the time limits on marriage.
Firstly is this true and what is the  criteria? If it isn't true do you know if this is the Hindu custom? the reason i ask that is because the village where my family are from is dominated by the Hindu culture. The State is Marharastra, Ratnagiri!
Thank you for your help.

Best Wishes


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4 Responses »

  1. Salaams,

    There is nothing in Islamic culture that stipulates that one must marry within a certain timeframe or wait until a certain amount of time has passed if someone in the family passes away. Of course, it's always adviseable to be sensitive to those who are grieving before planning an occassion such as a wedding, but other than that there are no limitations such as the ones you are describing.

    I cannot answer whether this is an ideal grounded in Hindu customs because I do not have much knowledge about that religion's culture. Perhaps another reader who is more knowledgable about that can comment on that aspect.

    -Amy Editor

  2. Waleykum Assalaam Sister,

    You can marry anytime when Allah wills and grants your wish.

    Marriage in Islam is not a "grand wedding". It is good if it is simple and done in presence of a few people and a feast is given to make the marriage public.

    You may marry anytime Allah wills in day or night, after someone is born or when someone has died, but as Sister Amy wrote, just take care of the feelings of people for a few days, if you want. And still in religion there is nothing to stop you from marrying on the very next day someone dies in your relatives.

    It is by the will of Allah at the time ordained.

    Whether Hindus do this or not is not our concern. We are Muslims and Islam has no prohibition of marriage due to death of a relative. It is a cultural thing and cultural as I say is a big enemy of religion lot of times.

    Your brother.

  3. Salaams Darkang3l
    I agree with all advices above there is no time limit. In Islam you can get married whenever you want. And if you are both ready go ahead. This is hindu's tradition becasue Indians follow this sorry if i offened anyone. We are muslims dont even know why people in our muslim culture started doing such things or believe what indians do. I want all our muslims to follow their own reglion and stop being influence on indian drama's or indian channels becasue this is where this is coming from. Much to my jaw dropping and shocked I had a 8 years old muslim asking how marriages are performed and she thought we did 7 rings arounds the fire I had to correct her that we dont perform our marragies like this. Let us all guide muslims onto the correct path ameen.

    Inshallah it will do go well for you good luck with the wedding.

  4. My wife passed away 17 month ago on first baby delivery.I waited 1 year .After long wait I was planning to marry as I have a kid.But recently My father passes away(7 days back).Now how much time I should wait for my remarriage.Is there any certain time as per Shariyat.Plz inform.

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