Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Marriage proposals… what to do?

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Salam brothers and sisters

I'm just wondering why this brother wants to marry me at a young age we are both in high school right now and he doesn't talk to me because he wants to keep it halal and doesn't want the shatyan to get us involved in something wrong or haram like even talking / flirting and I respect his decision because I agree and we probably have five years to get marry yeah but he says its worth the wait without talking or seeing each other so now we are just waiting. I had a lot of guys tell me they want to marry me but he seemed actually really interested. But I feel like it's a long time and since we talk for the time he might forget me and I don't like this guy, but I don't mind marry him either .... He prays 5 times a day. Still may Allah save me from the haram.

A week ago I had a dream about this guy who I have known for just a year but I don't like him in that way , talked to him a few times but in a halal way possible in the dream he proposed me to marry him and I said no and he started crying in the dream and I felt bad and told him it's not you its my mom he wouldn't say yes to you after that dream a week after that guy Msged me telling me he wants to marry me and he seemed serious and he doesn't want to talk to me because he says its haram to talk to girls and he tries his best to be a good Muslim and I know for a fact that he doesn't want anything from me. He wants the best for both of us and he prays 5 times a day. Does this mean he really loves me ? Wants to get married with me ? Never seen or heard him being other girls! Should I tell my mother about him ? Should I wait for him ? Should I trust his words ? We don't talk we have him blocked on social media so the shaytan doesn't get us involved in the wrong doings !

Learning_islam


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4 Responses »

  1. Sister im going straight to the point . You and the rest of the teenie boppers are to young and immature. Seriously ask yourself look around you.How are you treated at families and other places .What do your friends talk about compared to real Adults?First thing build on your career and the knowledge of deen into practice. Master the art of salah aswell as the quranic language ...Getting married is easy ...but living together and having kids comes with a big test with challenges and you will be tested.. so dont make a mistake ...many people do and they regret it. The only ideal canditates who i recomend getting married at a young age are scholors (alim) and a strong wife who is learned too why because they have Allahs blessings and help .Majority these people studied at the durool looms for 6789 yrs and so they have to live in theses qaurters which taught them to be independant responsible and most of all patient.Oridanary joes like us mix deen with duniya. If you watch t v and movies and some music your life is hanging by the thread basically unless you grow to overcome this. This is what the world offers sweet dreams but a screwed up life. Sister have a backup plan just incase u decide to get married for security.

  2. Dear Sister

    I suggest that you get engaged or involve parents of both family to someone you like as early as possible you find convenient. It is the only way to secure a relation-ship otherwise you or he will easily forget this romance within five years.

    Longtime romance is unpredictable and dangerous but a longtime relationship is much reliable and predictable one.

  3. dear sister, i wont advice you do engagement or marriarge but face your future first, like RAUL said, getting married is easy but living together is the hardest, in this life only ALLAH is the most perfect, he may loves you now but immediately you agreed and get married he will got tired of you at a young age and start looking for new girls with good education and good handwork, he will leave you to be with them instead, so my advice is that you shuld tell him to wait if he can until you achieve something in this life and you make sure you cut all contact with him so you fall for him easily.

    WORK HARD AND MAKE YOURSELF WORTHY OF HIM FIRST

  4. Dear sister the above advice by all three Raul, Aishat and feelix are right
    I really advice you to educate yourself and for now or involve your parents..
    There are lots of people out there who slowly by doing sweet talk will reel their ways into you,one way or other. Once they get your trust fully they may control you, or put you on the wrong track.
    I don't understand why you are thinking about marriage and getting so serious about lads. Do you want to leave school and straight away get married, it's not a bad thing but it is sad. You only have one chance in life to make a good decent career by educating yourself.
    Education is a good thing, no one can take away,so once your educated enough to stand on your own feet then by all means get your parents involved and find a suitable partner. Do you seriously want marriage, kids at a young age and struggle in life? What happens if it doesn't work out huh?
    Like the others say before us, marriage is easy, it's the commitment which will bring many ups and downs. Life when married isn't all glory glory, everyone will face challenges, so one needs to be prepared for the times ahead.
    Your young in high school these guys are probably young and are not aware of the sacrifices one has to give in a married life, so many things one has to work at,to meet their partner half way. Then there are money/financial worries and plus in the long run worries about someone better out there taking interest in your partner or maybe you, demons are everywhere So faith needs to be strong for both as well ..
    Insha Allah in time when the time is right you will find Mr right, but for now stop thinking about lads, educate yourself in everything , deen and also get a degree whatever, so that you can support yourself in the long run.
    Boys usually don't know what they really want has a partner because they muture much later around about 25, so don't rush into marriage. Best of luck anyway, you have lots of advice on here so be wise.

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