Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Missing my husband

We have been married for 15 months. He lives abroad and we are waiting for my immigration he recently filed my immigration after 11 months of my marriage because he's a bit "lazy". He left two weeks after the wedding and then visited 9 months later. Its been 5 months since the last visit. I miss him too much and i have him on my mind all the time and im frustrated and angry and i fear that this might become a part of my personality. For him to visit me the first  i cried for months and begged him

we love each other. But all the relatives, neighbors mock me. Taunt me for still being here at my parents house without him. What should i do. I see other couples and it makes me miss him more. Its not just the sex but the little things like the touch of his hands etc  that i miss  i fear that this might create long term problems

our entire marriage is based on whatsapp and now most of our convos end in arguments  i argue mostly and he doesn't take my frustration seriously

im depressed and sad and i cry a lot

he says to be patient but i cant

help with any duas please


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5 Responses »

  1. Assalaamualaykum hschohan,

    I'm sorry that you are in discomfort and are having to adjust to a long-distance relationship with your husband right now. He did file for your immigration so that tells me that he is interested in having you there with him and that is great news! Inshallah you will feel better then. In the meantime, try not to worry too much about what the neighbors are thinking and saying. They are not in your situation, nor can they judge it. Try the following dua to give you some peace while you two are separated:

    "Hasbi Allahu wa ni'mal wakeel" [(Allah is sufficient for me, and He is the best disposer of affairs (trustee)].

    This dua is a reminder that even right now in your difficulty, you are being taken care of by the best of caretakers. You will not feel as lonely, and have hope and positive thoughts about your not so far-off future with your husband.



  2. Bit of a lame answer above. You need to find out whats going on. Does he have another wife. Sabar never helped anyone. This slow slow attitude helps nobody.

    Find out what hes upto . Could be nothing but why is he dragging his feet and whats with the whatsapp communication. Why not face time, phone or more frequent visits.

    I smell a rat. Why mince words . Save yourself a whole lot of trouble. Also you should worry what the neighbours are saying. We are emotional beings, we cant just shut them out. Be proactive Gain control of your life. Either he wants you with him or he doesnt . In the meantime he has to make some effort to show you how much he is missing you.

    Lame man

    • I'm in the position as the husband, i got married and lost my job because of covid so it's actually really hard trying to call your spouse over. Even with everything in place now it isn't actually as efficient as pre covid due to the fact of people still working from home it's been a year since I've filed for my wife's visa but still get the response of its a waiting game.
      This doesn't mean that there is something wrong going on I've spent the last 10 months with my wife and i miss her a lot as i had to come back and chase up all the bs to get her over.
      Some people are just haters and if you can't give good advice please don't give any.

  3. This is a old post. Not sure if the person who posted this is still active. Tell us the update. This is what I have to say, below.

    “ he recently filed my immigration after 11 months of my marriage because he's a bit "lazy"

    This sounds like a red flag. It took him nearly a year to apply for you because he was lazy! Something doesn’t seem right. If he really wants to bring you soon then he wouldn’t delay something like this. Do you have video chat with him? Watch his facial expression if he is being genuine. I don’t know what to say. Search him up on the internet to see what he is up to. Don’t listen to the people who mocks you. Avoid them as much as you can and change the subject if they ask.

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