Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Muslim boyfriend is giving me mixed signals

Christian/Muslim Marriages

Hello,

I have a Muslim male friend and I would like to be more serious about him. We are talking for half a year via skype. Last month he decided to visit his family. He asked me if I would be sad if he got engaged with another girl which his mum prepared for him there and he havent ever seen her. I considered it a good joke and teased her. However, he returned having a fiancé. I am confused about it so is he. I told him and it come right now or  and end it as soon as possible. He told me not to wait for him, that he is not angry if I get another boyfriend, it is ok for him. That he wouldnt like to engage me in his problems.

One question, if he loves me, he said I am his special friend. There is something more about us but we are still friends only. I agree, but I can see there is really something more about us, if we are talking every day. Sometimes he has not nice jokes on me, which makes me nervous and want to not talk to him anymore and then he say that he won't ever tease me. He also says take care to me while leaving the chat, althought it took him longer time then I expected to do it.

He also said he is not sure if he is able to solve his stuff with gf (fiancé). Then he said he wouldnt ever marry girl for something other then love. I confronted him with the right: he can't have gf and he said, he can if he think it seriously and want to marry her.

Should I talk to him? I dont know if it is wise if both our parents would be against it and he doesn't respect Jesus (I'm a Catholic girl). He would expect me to rise our children s Muslims which would mean to tell my kids to have more wives is not a sin.

Still I find him better then my another boyfriend who doesnt pray at all. So to believe that he would raise children to believe in God is foolish.

Thanks,
A.


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2 Responses »

  1. Peace be upon you 🙂

    To recap:
    1) You are Catholic, and you want your kids to be raised the same
    2) He is Muslim, not sure how much is he practicing of it cause he is not supposed to have relationships before marriage.
    3) He is engaged. Imagine if he was engaged to you, would you be OK with him having a "Special" Female friend?
    4) One day you will find a man that suits you, would he like the fact you still have a "Special" friend?

    I would say let him go, cut your ties with him and go forward 🙂

    I would also suggest you read a bit more about Islam from good resources. Islam is much much more than just having four wives. Not to mention that one wife is more than enough to drive you crazy 🙂 Not to be disrespectful of women 🙂

    May ALLAH guide us, grant us patience, and shower us with his mercy.

    If I am correct, it is from ALLAH. If I err it is from me, and I pray ALLAH forgives me. Allah knows best.

    Peace upon you.

  2. It's obvious that he is not a true practicing Muslim seeing as that he 1. has a female "special friend" and 2 doesn't respect Jesus. What? It's a MUST for Muslims to respect ALL of the prophets and messengers of God, from Adam to Muhammad, and yes that includes Jesus. This guy has no respect for his Lord, none for the woman he's with and certainly none for you, otherwise he wouldn't be stringing you along and would not have dared to ask you if it were ok to get engaged to someone else when he hasn't even committed to you.

    Leave him, he's using you! This "special friend" nonsense means that he wants to keep you on the back burner when there's no other woman around. Why make someone your priority when for them you're only an option?

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