Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Muslim girl in love with a Muslim boy

Interactions between the engaged couple


I'm a 19 years old Muslim girl. I'm in love with a boy who also loves me. We know each other for 2 years and are in love for one and half year. We have plans to get married in future. We just talk on texts don't even talk on calls. We don't talk about the stuff that will take us to sin. Our conversations are clean I want to keep it as Halal as possible. . We rarely meet up i.e, 1 time in 6 months. I can't focus on studies since the last time I met him. He tried to get me closer but I didn't let him and since the day I've started to having thoughts about him and our future life. I think of him all the time. I keep dreaming I don't know what's wrong LOL. What should I do?

Also, I don't want him to get distracted. I want him to be aware about haram and halal. He's  kind of careless and a little bit week in emaan. If I'll try to guide him he'll take it as a joke. Should I talk to him about it? If yes then in what ways? I want him to be on the righteous path. May Allah provide him guidance

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4 Responses »

  1. " I want him to be aware about haram and halal" " I want him to be on the righteous part"
    Sister you can't preach him about halal and haram when you, yourself are not practicing what you preach. You want him to be on the righteous part? Than start with yourself first. You can't preach about halal when you are doing haram yourself, no one is going to take you serious dear. Boyfriend girlfriend relationships are haram and there is not such a thing like keep it halal as possible.there is nothing in between dear. You said he tried to get you closer but you didn't let him. Sister meeting him without a maharam is not allowed because when you are both alone shaytan is the thirth person. You think it's not harmful but soon or later everything will become more complicated and you might commit even a bigger sin. That's why in Islam a man and women who are not married to each other shouldn't be talking or meeting. He is your non maharam and you shouldn't be talking to him in the first place. To be honest with you he doesn't sound like he would make a good future husband. However if you both want to be together, you need to get married. If he is serious with you he can come and ask your dad for your hand in marriage. Tell him and if he finds any excuses than stop all the communication with him, it's not worth it. You are 19 and sound quite naive. Ask yourself what qualities you would want in your future husband and choose Wisley. Try to keep yourself busy with useful stuff for now. Learn about your Deen or study, don't waist your time talking to non maharam men online.

  2. In my opinion the two of you are not compatible. If you want someone who is serious about Islam and who prays, then seek someone with such character.

    You cannot change anyone. Human beings are independent and self-directed. You can try, and perhaps you will have some effect, but you can't count on being able to change him. You cannot base your plans and future on the hope that you will change him.

    You're still young. There's no reason to commit yourself to this particular person. Let him go and find someone more suitable.

    Wael Editor

  3. "make him do the right things"

    No one can make anyone do anything. Every human being will do only what he believes in his heart and truly wants to do. Anything else is pretense.

    Wael Editor

  4. Salam .Sister don't play innocent.the question is what is innocent.To get straight to the point.SHAITAN is a master of evil .His goals are always long term.Slowly but surely.Sins are committed and it will effect you. YOU LOSE TAQWA AND ALL OTHER AMALS START TO LEAVE

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