Islamic marriage advice and family advice

My current situation (Online Love)


Hello Brothers and sisters,

I need some help regarding on what to do. Before I explain my situation i have a disclaimer. I heave read TONS of online resources and story about if dating is haram or not and certain situations. I just want another opinion on what I should do.

So here is my situation, I met this girl after playing online in a video game. We had another person with us and I trust him as he was my friend many months before so I could tell that this girl is actually a girl and NOT one of those online relationship where the girl is not really a girl or anything. The next day we talk and I didnt expect to like her but after talking with her it felt good. I never thought I would date or anything as I wanted to wait until I was 25 to marry or look for a girl. I know people say that dating is haram and I should not be talking with this girl but I cant help and think that if you are looking for someone to marry wont that be dating before marriage? I am just confused about that part. We have talked about my religion but it wasnt recently when I looked it up that what Im doing is wrong. We have been talking since a month ago.

I swear to god brothers and sisters that I didnt know what I was doing is haram and I have been looking the past several days for answers and that is why I come to you guys.

I know i maybe wrong but i just wanted to ask....if I dont want to completely terminate our relationship, can I just tell her to not contact me but we will talk maybe once a month just to catch up until I am older and if nothing has changed for the next few months then I will fully terminate it and with this new knowledge i know to stop dating or talking to girls and wait for my time.
Thank you for your time if you have any questions please feel free to ask and please keep the replies helpful.


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3 Responses »

  1. If you think she is the right one, what is preventing you to talk to her father and send an official proposal? Why do you have to wait until you are 25? It sounds that you are not sure about her and you are just leading her on for years.

  2. Assalaamualaikam

    You don't mention whether or not the girl reciprocates your feelings - is this a case of you liking her and not knowing how to manage those feelings, or the two of you wanting to be in a relationship with each other? It also isn't clear how old you (and the girl) are, and advice appropriate for a person who is legally old enough to marry wouldn't be appropriate for someone too young to marry.

    If you and she both like each other, then you could consider whether it would be appropriate for the two of you to get to know each other better in order to decide whether or not to marry. This would of course be dependent upon both of you being old enough to marry. You would need to involve both families and ensure that any contact between you happens in a chaperoned, Islamically-appropriate way. Then, you and she can decide whether to marry.

    If one or both of you is too young to legally marry in your country or if you don't know if she likes you too, then it would be best for you to limit your interactions with her and with all non-mahram females. If it isn't possible to play this game without talking with her in a 1:1 setting, then I'd recommend stopping playing it. There are plenty of games which won't require you to talk 1:1 with people, and plenty of other hobbies you can explore.

    Midnightmoon editor

  3. This haram and a lack of true knowledge n guidance. ..Result will lead to weak online ...

    Get it

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