Islamic marriage advice and family advice

My husband does not listen to me and says I argue all the time

Angry husband, no love, husband turning away


I am 21 and I just got married to my beautiful husband a little over two months ago. We had a big argument over him not giving me his phone because he always uses my phone when he feels like it. I Went on facebook and then he grabbed his phone off of me saying he doesnt know what stuff from the past was on there and wasnt comfortable with me seeing stuff from his past. I was angry and upset and thought he was cheating or doing dodgy stuff so i went downstairs and came back upstairs after five minutes and started packing my stuff. He told me where was i going i said im going home (to my mums house) he said im not letting you go anywhere at this time. I said leave me alone i dont trust you and youre hding stuf from me and he said i am not its just there was stuff with his previous relationships he didnt want me to see and before that his ex's sister was liking stuff on instagram i knew who she was but he didnt know i knew so i asked him he said he didnt know who she was and then i said that was the first lie and then he told me after. Basically it was back and forth and it ended with him telling me that i am his wife and i should not have acted like that and you can do whatever you want on my phone you are my wife and you have every right but i am not hiding anything from you i love you so much etc.

But that day i still was not satisfied and so i left the next morning to go home and then just stopped speaking to him completelt and only returned for the sake of my mother in law the next day. I continued to be dismissive and he was being extremely more loving saying that he was so upset about what happened and couldn't imagine what he would do if i left him and so i told him the reason we are not getting along is because we did not discuss what happened propery and so i still felt upset that day. so when we first started discussing it was okay but after a while when i started asking him about why he was acting like that over his phone he said because there were photos of him and his ex of five years and wasnt comfortable with me seeing that. he said i wouldn't feel comfrotable with you seeing that either. He said the reason i did that is because he doesnt like speaking about his ex but i bring her up and i said i dont until she was messaging you while we were together before getting married. I know its a sin to be involved with someone prior to marriage but it was a huge mistake that i felt incredibly bad about. but everytime it happened or she was mentioned at all i would get upset and he said he just didnt want to mention  her because he didnt want me to get upset about it etc. but after i was trying to tell him why i was upset because of the fact that i feel like i couldnt speak to him and it was back and forth back and forth and basically didnt end well. i ended up going home and needing space as i did not want anything to do with the whole situation. since then we got into an argument of him saying i think im always right and i like to always argue but i get frustrated at the little things. for him he can do stuff but would want me to get over it quickly but for me its a big deal. i just want to be able to talk to my husband openly and freely without all the animosity. how do i do this

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1 Responses »

  1. salaams sister

    It's all about Not getting on each other's nerves! Here's a Great site that will teach you how to discuss things Peacefully!

    Please read and reread and Learn the technique

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