Islamic marriage advice and family advice

My husband has a low sexual drive.

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I got married to my husband at the end of 2012. It was very traditional, but not arranged. We both were not in a relationship before. We got engaged for a few months, and then married. During the first few months of our marriage, we had a good sex drive and we were both satisfied. Soon my husband's sex drive started decreasing, and we only have sex once a month. We do love each other and we are honest with each other, and I did ask him frequently if there is something that is making him not much interested in sex. He always says no, and blames me for having a high sex drive (which I don't think I do, and I do have a normal sex drive). I'm sorry if I'm getting too detailed, but it is frustrating me and I can't talk with anyone about it. Being anonymous on this site makes me pour my heart out.

I love my husband very much, and I know he is not doing anything sinful. However, I don't understand his low sex drive. I did ask him if he has any problems or if it something about me, and he says no. He turns me away many times when I try to get intimate with him, which makes me feel upset and frustrated. We both work and we both get stressed from work, but I try as hard as possible to make him satisfied- but I don't get the same in return. Even during our intimate acts he gets satisfied, and I don't. I have spoken to him many times and I have told him many times about my satisfaction, and what I would like in return. But it seems to go in one ear and out the other. I'm very honest and open to my husband and I love him, but I feel like he doesn't care about my satisfaction and doesn't seem to understand that I need to be sexually satisfied.

I apologize for being detailed, but I'm upset and I want this to work. Please, I need advice.


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43 Responses »

    IT'S SIMPLE if you want to really control it follow these instructions
    1. Delete all those porn graphic pictures and videos if HE HAS -any ....
    2. If you have A pc in your room just shift it to living room
    3. HE MUST-Try to do some serious exercise and try to visit the [GYM OR SWIMMING POOL] if you have any nearby your house this could help a lot.....
    Reliance on Allah is one of the most important.....FACTOR IN ALL MATTERS-
    Allah said: {And whoever fears Allah, He will provide him a way out and will provide for him from an unforeseen direction. And whoever relies on Allah, He is sufficient for him.}
    An inferiority complex is derived from a lack of confidence in Allah and oneself. You should never allow yourself to believe that you cannot fulfill your obligations...
    Self-confidence is borne from the Believer's intimate knowledge and understanding that Allah is ever ready to assist those who strive and struggle in His way. Self-confidence comes from depending upon Allah and knowing that He is there to help you, protect you and shower His mercies upon you:

    • Hi. U should try spend time around him. Coz for a wife husband is entire world. With full of emotions. He is human too and must be mentally upset to not concentrate. Remember if was good in start then all is well. Just concentration is decided or need company. About sex it cannot be obtained from mags or sites or heavy diets. Its natural so when u r mentally relax u have great time while resting hope u got my point. Plz instead of making itself upset support him. If u will have doubts then u will be a great looser. Help ur partner by all means to bring back the joys. Thanks.

  2. Well i think you should talk with him about the consequences of his behavior because as you mentioned you are recently married ( just a year and a few months) and as a guy i think its odd to have such a low sex drive so early,everything happen for a reason,try to get him educated about a female sexual needs through online articles or books something that won't make him embarrassed in front anyone. but again tell him seriously about the CONSEQUENCES because this complain is a beginning of a lot of bad marriage stories which sometimes ends with adultery or divorce or at the best chances a non happy life , so HONESTLY you must have a serious stop and talk with him because the sooner you deal with it the better .

  3. I know it can be frustrating when you want something and your spouse doesn't want what you want. most men before marriage thinks about sex 24/7 and thinking when their marriage time will come so they can do it. but when the time comes and finally the couple have sex, some guys get satisfied and content. meaning they've done it, now its no big deal. so if they do it once in a blue moon they are happy.

    some men don't realize when having sex its not just about your own satisfaction but your partners satisfaction.

    the wife has rights, if the wife wants sex then the husband should accept wither he is in the mood or not.

    just like when you first get married, the couple are willing and excited to explore and play, soon after there will be a time when the husband wants sex and the wife doesn't and vice-versa.

    for example some brothers who go gym for few months then they quit because they done what they want now they are happy and not bothered of the gym. same thing losing interest after you done what you really wanted to do. it is not un-common.

    it can also be with stress, working a lot with no free time, worry's and so on, no time to keep fit, relax etc. but mainly it can be for the above.

  4. Masha Allah very good replies from the sisters and brothers.

    I was eager to comment my own idea.

    Does your husband love cakes/ cookies?
    If so make him cakes/ cookies with some Dates in it. Dates are very good for sexual mood, it is also sunnah to eat it. If however you can't cook it give it to him raw time to time. Insha Allah his sexual desire will change.
    Good luck
    Allah knows best.
    Asalam alekum

    • Along with Dates, cow butter, Ginger, Garlic, honey, onions, pepper, black seeds ( Kalonji seeds -Nigella sativa ),almonds, drumsticks( a vegetable - Moringa oleifera ) are very effective in enhancing libido.

      Following is a recipe (excluding butter)from a famous medieval Arabic book to enhance libido in men
      Make about 500 ml of Onion juice using fresh onions, add 100 ml pure honey to it and heat it till 1/4 of the mixture of Onion juice & honey remains(approx. 200 ml ).

      Now take 150 g of pure cow butter separately and heat till it becomes clarified butter ( all moisture evaporates ).
      Add this to the onion + honey mixture, pour it in a bottle, shake well and store.

      Approx 1-2 tablespoon of this mixture should be taken on empty stomach in the morning everyday and Insha'Allah , it will help.

      • Assalaamalykum
        This sounds good and natural, just have a question, do you mix um up while hot or when its cold? Or?
        JazakAllah khair


    Source: From the book 'Remedies from the Holy Qur'aan' - An Abridged Translation of

    Presence Of Graves Of The Ambiyaa alaihim us salaam In India
    Some of the noble ones (buzurg) received kashf (hidden ghayb) that even in India also there are shrines (graves) of certain ambiyaa alaihim us salaam and there is a place after Ambaala (name of a place) there is an enclosure and in it there are these graves/shrines. The signs of these graves have not remained intact of all these graves but for some of them the signs still remain. Maulana Rafee uddeen once visited that place and some students aswell accompanied him and maulana became a MURAAQIB ( Devotee of the grave who medidates at the grave to receive hidden knowledge from the souls and enguages in communication with the dead souls) there and I did not hear from the Mawlaana directly but he mentioned it to his soofi-desciple (mureed) named Hussaini , and this mureed (follower of a peer – soofee shaykh) mentioned it to the son-in law of the Maulana and his son-in-law mentioned it to me that Maulana described the kayfiyah (state) of receiving kashf (hidden ghayb) – the souls of those noble ones (those alleged Prophets) enguaged in a spiritual connection with the Maulana and he met them and it came to be known that from among them one noble person’s name was Khidr or Khidhr and one other was his son (named) Ibraaheem and he informed that his era was Karnaa. With a rigorous research it was found that there was a King Karan (Raja Karan) who lived there and passed away approximately 2000 years from now.
    [Ashraf Alee Thanvi in Malfoozaath - Malfooz number 403 Volume 5 page 355]

    • Please explain, what is the innovations here? Is reading ayats of Quran to cure a disease an innovation?

      If you think so, then I pity your ignorance, reciting ayats of Quran, doing Ruqya to heal sickness is a Sunnah of our Prophet (pbuh)

      “We sent down in the Quran that which is a cure and mercy for the faithful”. (17:82)

      “Say: For those who have faith, it (Quran) is a guidance and healing; but as for those who are faithless, there is a deafness in their ears and it is lost to their sight”. (41:44)

      Sahih Bukhari Hadith (Volume 7, Number 631) Narrated 'Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her)

      During the Prophet's (prayers and peace be upon him) fatal illness, he used to recite the Mu'auwidhat (Surat An-Nas and Surat Al-Falaq) and then blow his breath over his body. When his illness was aggravated, I used to recite those two Suras and blow my breath over him and make him rub his body with his own hand for its blessings." (Ma'mar asked Az-Zuhri: How did the Prophet (prayers and peace be upon him) use to blow? Az-Zuhri said: He used to blow on his hands and then passed them over his face.)

      Sahih Bukhari Hadith (Volume 7, Number 632) Narrated Abu Said Al-Khudri (May Allah be pleased with him)

      Some of the companions of the Prophet (prayers and peace be upon him) came across a tribe amongst the tribes of the Arabs, and that tribe did not entertain them. While they were in that state, the chief of that tribe was bitten by a snake (or stung by a scorpion). They said, (to the companions of the Prophet (prayers and peace be upon him) ), "Have you got any medicine with you or anybody who can treat with Ruqya?" The Prophet's (prayers and peace be upon him) companions said, "You refuse to entertain us, so we will not treat (your chief) unless you pay us for it." So they agreed to pay them a flock of sheep. One of them (the Prophet's (prayers and peace be upon him) companions) started reciting Surat-al-Fatiha and gathering his saliva and spitting it (at the snake-bite). The patient got cured and his people presented the sheep to them, but they said, "We will not take it unless we ask the Prophet (prayers and peace be upon him) (whether it is lawful)." When they asked him, he smiled and said, "How do you know that Surat-al-Fatiha is a Ruqya? Take it (flock of sheep) and assign a share for me."

      Sahih Bukhari Hadith (Volume 7, Number 633) Narrated Ibn 'Abbas (May Allah be pleased with him)

      Some of the companions of the Prophet (prayers and peace be upon him) passed by some people staying at a place where there was water, and one of those people had been stung by a scorpion. A man from those staying near the water, came and said to the companions of the Prophet (prayers and peace be upon him) , "Is there anyone among you who can do Ruqya as near the water there is a person who has been stung by a scorpion." So one of the Prophet's (prayers and peace be upon him) companions went to him and recited Surat-al-Fatiha for a sheep as his fees. The patient got cured and the man brought the sheep to his companions who disliked that and said, "You have taken wages for reciting Allah's Book." When they arrived at Medina, they said, -O Allah's Apostle! (This person) has taken wages for reciting Allah's Book." On that Allah's Apostle said, "You are most entitled to take wages for doing a Ruqya with Allah's Book."

      Sahih Bukhari Hadith (Volume 7, Number 634) Narrated 'Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her)

      The Prophet (prayers and peace be upon him) ordered me or somebody else to do Ruqya (if there was danger) from an evil eye.

      Sahih Bukhari Hadith (Volume 7, Number 635) Narrated Um Salama (May Allah be pleased with her)

      The Prophet (prayers and peace be upon him) saw in her house a girl whose face had a black spot. He said. "She is under the effect of an evil eye; so treat her with a Ruqya."

      Sahih Bukhari Hadith (Volume 7, Number 636) Narrated Abu Huraira (May Allah be pleased with him)

      The Prophet (prayers and peace be upon him) said, "The effect of an evil eye is a fact." And he prohibited tattooing.

      Sahih Bukhari Hadith (Volume 7, Number 637) Narrated Al-Aswad (May Allah be pleased with him)

      I asked 'Aisha about treating poisonous stings (a snake-bite or a scorpion sting) with a Ruqya. She said, "The Prophet (prayers and peace be upon him) allowed the treatment of poisonous sting with Ruqya."

      Sahih Bukhari Hadith (Volume 7, Number 638) Narrated 'Abdul 'Aziz (May Allah be pleased with him)

      Thabit and I went to Anas bin Malik. Thabit said, "O Abu Hamza! I am sick." On that Anas said, "Shall I treat you with the Ruqya of Allah's Apostle?" Thabit said, "Yes." Anas recited, "O Allah! The Lord of the people, the Remover of trouble! (Please) cure (Heal) (this patient), for You are the Healer. None brings about healing but You; a healing that will leave behind no ailment."

      Sahih Bukhari Hadith (Volume 7, Number 639) Narrated 'Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her)

      The Prophet (prayers and peace be upon him) used to treat some of his wives by passing his right hand over the place of ailment and used to say, "O Allah, the Lord of the people! Remove the trouble and heal the patient, for You are the Healer. No healing is of any avail but Yours; healing that will leave behind no ailment."

      Sahih Bukhari Hadith (Volume 7, Number 640) Narrated 'Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her)

      Allah's Apostle (prayers and peace be upon him) used to treat with a Ruqya saying, "O the Lord of the people! Remove the trouble. The cure is in Your Hands, and there is none except You who can remove it (the disease). "

  6. It must be very frustrating to have lost sexual interest in your wife. First and foremost, a fulfilling sexual relationship isn't dependent on frequency or specific sexual behaviors. Instead it's reliant on whether the sexual experience makes both you and your wife feel good without compromising either person's health. In order to become sexually aroused and to function normally, you will need to have a feeling of self-confidence, freedom from anxiety, the presence of arousing mental and physical stimulation, and the ability to focus attention on sexually arousing thoughts or behaviour. Anything that interferes with these conditions can disrupt a sexual encounter. If one or more of these conditions is unavailable, an inability to perform can become an ongoing problem.

    Self-confidence includes a belief that you'll be able to perform sexually, and a belief that your wife finds you attractive If one of you constantly belittles or threatens the other, such confidence can be undermined.

    Any type of anxiety can lead to an episode of sexual failure. The most common type of anxiety is performance anxiety, in which the person is afraid that he or she won't be able to become aroused and function normally. This fear of failure is self-perpetuating because the anxiety interferes with arousal. The inability to become aroused then increases the anxiety.

    In order to become aroused, you generally need the mental stimulation of a wife you love (which you stated you do) or find attractive, combined with appropriate physical stimulation.

    In order for stimulation to be arousing, it is necessary for a person to be able to pay attention to it. If someone is distracted by thoughts of possible failure or a lack of self-confidence or has concerns about how the partner is reacting, this will distract from the arousing sexual activity.

    Start out slowly without putting pressure on yourself and gradually build things up as you go along. If nothing works for an extended period then perhaps you may want to consult a psychosexual counsellor. I wish you all the best.

  7. Salam,

    I have the same problem sister. I have been married for the past 6 weeks and I am finding myself initiating sex with my husband most of the time. I know what the problem is, I am very controlling and I have a strong character. He has a strong personality too, we therefore clash a lot. I initiate last time but he turned me down, I felt so hurt.. but I feel like he is holding sex as it is something he has control over. I have since distanced myself from him and he is also distant now. I feel like we are heading toward a divorce at this rate.

    I have tried to control myself around him and let him deal with matters even though he comes rushing for my advice as he values my opinion. He has been against everything I say.. for example, if I say white he says no its black. I am sooo tired of it.. I am resulting in pleasuring myself as I have needs indeed. Sorry to share sooo much.

    I don't know what to do no more... if feel soooo depressed about it.. as I know I deserve to be treating like a princess as I do treat him like a King not even a prince!!!

  8. salam
    this type of problems come at when husband has a strong ego and he wants to b up and up from his wife..
    my husband is also like that even i m more expressiv in love but when eva i ask him to express he says dont advise me i know what i do..if u want express ur love sexualy u can do i will not forbed u but do not ask me to do soo...when i will want i will do..but he doesnt setesfy me..i hate such a just panitrating sex which has no feelings..and he likes just panitrate and nothing...he loves another girl he express avery time his love with his girl friend through mobile and i don know they may keep dating till now but i m v disappointed from this situatin..
    i will advise u that if your husband is not involve in another girl then plz give him some time..there are lots of homeo pathic drops that u can easily mix in foods which can inhance his feelings..

  9. There could be a whole host of reasons why your husband isn't aligned with your sexual appetite, but for us to provide insight for a person whom we don't know will just make you think of thoughts which the Shaytan will take complete advantage and cause a greater rift. The best advice is to communicate with your husband after having relations which is when a man is most in touch with his emotions. Do not pester him to reveal all, but pose a simple question and await his response, but be ever so patient and understanding. Remember, you are being test with just enough which Allah knows you can handle so just surpass this test and inshallah you will reap the benefits.

  10. Type on youtube natural viagra drink there are videos that teaches how to make drinks for sexual drive it helps increase sexual drive tell him eat alot of watermelons with lemon it increases the feeling by alot.

  11. All guys has good ideas but I think the who can not do intercourse with his wife he should control his gaze from na mahrim ladies. And recite Quran daily. donot shave.this is my experience a man do these three things. he can not refrain his lust.I fulfill my desires after tow days.

  12. Reading what you wrote sister brought me to tears. It was like reading my story I swear, word to word. I'm getting so disturbed and upset because of my husbands lack of sexual interest in me that i have not even bothered to approach him now since the last 4 months. He as always shows no interest too. He is o.k with not having this intimate relation but it is bothering me a lot. Allah has blessed me with good features & a normal body, we love each other. We are best of friends but when it comes to this I don't know what's wrong. Discussing this always leads to a fight. He too thinks that my sex drive is too high whereas I disagree. Getting intimate at least once in 2 weeks is not being a pervert I think. When your friends are sharing how intimate and romantic their husbands are I feel so depress. The 2 main points that differentiate my case are that my husband drinks alcohol often 2ndly he likes watching porn alone too at times. Its like I'm living a married virgin life. It's frustrating. It's my right & a natural need.

    • H.U: Its like I'm living a married virgin life

      How long have you been married? Has you husband been always like that?

      He may be using porn and alcohol due to his sexual inadequacy. In few cases Alcholism may cause sexual problems.

      You and your husband should go for sex therapy. I don't think your sex drive is high. It is your husband who needs help. Fighting is not going to help.

    • while i was reading that post i was also shocked that someone has stolen story of my lifeee sameeee things are happening with me ...i also need advice now tired of solving problems all alone ..

  13. This happens cause of lack of testosterone levels. Send ur husband ro the gym and give him Hugh testosterone level foods and he will want sex everyday.
    Try to use olive oil in all your foods, this will really build his sexual drive and will increase his testosterone levels.
    Secondly buy dates and eat alot of dates and almonds with him, this will also really help.
    thirdly put 7dates (ajwa preferred) into milk at night time, leave them in milk the entire night, and in the morning grind the da tes in milk by adding honey and cardamom powder. This drink will insha Allah treat all sexual defencies.
    Fourthly give him two bananas in the morning, this will also give a huge boost.
    Fifthly buy many red/dark fruits like raspberries, cherries, strawberries, blueberries, blacknerrys and specially pomegranate by making all this into a juice. Red is very good for mens vitality. Tge pomegranate juice will do wonders. Add all this in the morning and make a smoothie or juice out of it which will do wonders.
    sixth buy walnuts, almonds, etc
    Seventhly a very amazing testosterone and sex drive builder:eggs. Give him eggs with olive oil for bfast in the morning and boiled eggs at night. This will make him initiate the sex. U won't have to do anything dw lol.
    Rightly there is a herb called 'shilajit' , buy that!. This does the impossible and is the most potent herb in the world. Don't buy from everywhere. There is a legit site called Lotus blooming herbs (search google). The way to use this is microwave or anyway heat the milk to boiling temperature, and then add a chickpeas size to the milk and mix properly that everything blends in to the milk properly 100%. And then serve when it's drinkable while being hot.
    Eightly stay away from all foods which decreases libido and testosterone levels. Search google for that.
    Monthly feed him celery. Celery will do wonders!
    All these things I mentioned will do wonders and you'll be surprised. Make sure he's not watching porn though cause that will kill it. If you follow all this I mentioned, you will thank me insha Allah!
    And make sure you buy shilajit, it's a little expensive, but will make him crazy and he will need sex really badly!! You will be surprised!

    • Assalam o alikum
      Jaza ka Allah
      My husband doesn't eat any fruits but yes he eats dry fruits and dates and eggs. So I ll in sha Allah follows these.
      But problem is 'shiljat' that herb you are taking about from that lotus site. They don't ship it to Pakistan.
      How can I get it in Pakistan?

      • Salajeet available in Pakistan gilgit baltistan...salajeet is very powerful natural mineral a God gifted.. Salejet cure every thing in body specially sex drive libido and testetron level high.. No side effects you feel you become again 18year or some time thinking of 2 wife's lol xxxx but salajeet should be original my sister.. 6 months mai sab normalise hojayega.. In fact first dose make him crazy

  14. asalam o alikum...

    • Assalaamualaikam

      We have published many posts on these topics. Please search our archives.

      Midnightmoon editor

  15. Have you changed physically? Sex is physical and mental so make sure you are doing everything on your part to stay as attractive as when you first got married.

    • If a husband or wife ignore the other's needs but they themselves are being satisfied, it isn't about physical attractiveness, it's about being selfish.

  16. Have you made sure your husband is not taking any medicine for his hair loss?
    Finasteride, Saw palmetto and some shampoos can kill man's sex drive for good. I am saying this after my personal experience. I used saw palmetto five years ago and now I am permanently impotent. I have got other health issues as well as a result of my hair loss medicine.I regret big time now. I tried to save my hair and lost my manhood. Please keep in mind Cholesterol lowering drugs can make you impotent too. Please be careful. IF some body thinks I am making up stories then he should look at
    here I am giving just post from above website as sample

  17. Salam, i need to share my problem also... loking for solutions from all of u sisters and brothers.
    i m in 9th year of marriage. Age is 30. 3 kids and now my sexual desire has been falling day by day for couple of months. I feel desire once a month only. Plz tell me how to cover sexual weakness and increase desire. Also my physical and mental health is not good enough due to strokes in life. My husband is a time passing man. A flirt. All these things have also broken me.

  18. Add few things in his diet..

    - Raw onion in salad
    - Avoid watching pornography
    - Add dried dates in daily routine
    - One or two spoons of honey in 1 glass of warm milk before bed
    - Keep life stress free, as stress kills sex drive
    - Try to avoid conflicts.
    - Try not to miss your prayers

  19. Give him onion and ginger in breakfast and lunch

  20. bitter gourd is best for sex drive so try it the juice daily mourning empty

  21. Dear Sister,

    One of the possible reasons of man losing interest in his wife is due to the fact that women usually do not take care of themselves regarding personal hygiene. A huge turn off for a man is when he notices hairs grown all over his wife's body specially legs and pubic hairs.
    Since you are a working woman, I'm sure that's not the case with you. But most of the housewives don't really bother to remove the unwanted hairs.

    • Sister give him onion/onion juice, ginger, injeer and specially dates, as you know eating dates is sunnah.
      May ALLAH you

  22. Asalam o allaikum sister
    In my views, give him (your husband) onion/onion juice, honey, ginger, injeer and specially dates, as you know eating dates are sunnah
    May ALLAH solve your problem

  23. I have coross the same situation last four years ..... No one help me because I am a lady not a man and my husband is strong by wealth and I am very wek ... Sometime I decided to kill myself but I have a baby .... I have no path ...

  24. Assalamualikum wrwb sister,

    I hope you get this message. Research about Ruqyah. Your husband maybe afflicted with evil eye or magic. Evil eye can arise both out of jeaolosy as well as amazement. One can cast an eye on himself/herself too.

    Even if he isn't afflicted, research about Ruqyah. The entire Quran is a healing for mankind. Diseases and afflictions, both physical and spiritual are indeed cured by Quran.

    A great way to start is here:

    Do not go to a Raaqi and never ever give your mother's name to any Sheikh. The entire purpose of disease or affliction and then seeking a proper cure is from the wisdom of Allah SWT so His servant can return back to Him. That's why it is preferred for oneself to heal ones own relationship with Allah SWT.

    Make dua to Allah SWT and encourage him to do so as well.

    I ask Allah SWT to bless you both in goodness and companionship. Amen.

  25. My husband has got very low sex drive. We just have sex for the sake of having it from day 1. He is always like that from 1 st day of our marriage. I feel bad and not wanted. I have tried many ways to seduce him or attract him or have done everything to encourage good and healthy sexual relationship but I fail. We have been married since 3 years now and we have no kids.
    These days he is doing sex twice a week and that when I insist. And obviously we have been trying to have kids so we have to. But he is never upto it by himself like normal guys. He is performing it as a duty and formally.
    I don't know what should I do.
    Pls help according to Islam.

  26. Dear Sister , i am a 27 year old guy. Sorry i will say some adult stuff just to help you and make you understand what might be the reason.

    my firsthand experience . as i said i am 27 years old guy , have been watching porn from childhood till last year . i used to bring my mobile phone with me when ever i had to take bath or had to go to sleep then i used to close my door and start masturbating . i used to masturbate 1-5 a day every day with the help of porn and sometimes erotic scenes of bollywood movies also would work.
    now i came to vietnam until now i thought as i can masturbate 1-5 times i can satisfy any girl.
    i married to a russian girl , she is super beautiful . ist night as i didn't know about my problem i was confident and i started making love with her and was pretty successful but next day my penis could not get erect . but i somehow managed and had sex but i was expecting that i can have sex whole night.
    next night my interest towards her became next to zero.

    Then i research online and i came to know i suffer from PIED (porn induced erectile dysfunction) .
    Porn induced Erectile dysfunction is a mental problem a guy develops by watching porn .
    Our brain is naturally created in a way to respond sexually by just looking and touching body of woman and this thing works as a trigger to release some pleasure giving chemicals in our brain such as dopomine Norepinephrine oxytocin serotonin and testosterone .
    But when we see porn and masturbate we are teaching brain to react to digital & virtual images made of pixels instead of real body.
    So we rewire our brain to work differently.
    So after masturbating at porn i had taught brain to react and work on virtual sex and pixels and images rather than real life human beings.

    Solution for it is that stop watching porn even simple Movies where actresses are dressed sexy
    completely shut the option for anything that is virtual , pixel and sexual or tempting.

    keep having sex even if you fail.
    with time if your brain will start again learning how to have sex with real girls and how to react sexually to beautiful bodies.
    But it will only work if he breaks his addiction to porn completely and will keep trying to have sex with you until his brain again will become sensitive to real body.

    tell him that he should not feel shy or embarrased not being fully able to have sex and tell him he suffers from pied. and tell him how he will gain sexual sensitivity back to real sex .
    thus he will feel relaxed and in sha allah from very same moment he will start feeling improvement even just 5%.
    Note it takes at least 3 months to recover and in some severe cases till 15 months.

    i am healed now and my wife does sleep much these days. 🙂
    and spread this information with others as most people do not know what happened to their libidos

  27. Viagra or weed may do the trick

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