Islamic marriage advice and family advice

My mother is in a relationship with another guy

muslim woman holding onto quran

assalamualaikum,

i am a 17 year old girl and have been watching my mother talk to guys on phone. Since the last 4 years i have had some suspicions about her...and whenever i confronted her she always denied everything. She first befriends the guys through facebook and then develops a friendship with them.

at first i used to hate her for that but her denial was so strong that i started believing her but now it has gotten much worse.

A guy who lives abroad, who has two children with a woman who has left him, sent my mum a friend request she accepted it beacause he is a relative of her sisters friend. That friend sometimes come to our place too. That guy told my mum all these things about how he had been alone for so long and that he dreamt about my mum and fate and everything.

she felt sympathetic and started talking to him daily

now he takes all of her time.she barely pays attention to me and my siblings and i think that she likes him because he surely does he has confessed his feelings many times

my mum talks to his two children and sends them stuff. That guy sends alot of stuff too and emphasis on the alot.

my mum seeks attention not that she doesnt get any... My father is a very very good man. He doesnt deserve this i think all the time about how my mother is decieving him. Plus i feel neglected and she doesnt understand me at all.

sorry for taking so much of your time but really need your help i am always stressed out and i fight alot with my mum.

Fatima

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7 Responses »

  1. Well your Dad needs evidence but I'm sure deep down he must know.?Anyways tell your mom your jeopardizing your Deen. Allah gas clearly warned those who have estranged relationships.

  2. walekum salam.
    My dear Allah swt commands us to be respectful to our parents no matter how much you dislike them. Your mother is having an affair with another man , its really sad but remember you are not responsible for her sin, you wouldnt be answerable in the day of judgement . She will be answerable for her deeds, all you can do now is supplicate to Allah swt to guide your mother to the right path , to forgive her, show her the right path, beg Allah swt to stop your mother from committing such a huge sin.
    Try your best to be kind to your mother and advice her whenever the need arises but advice her respectfully as Allah swt commanded us in the quran, Allah swt has himself said to pray for our parents. Pray to Allah swt to have mercy on them, to forgive them.
    Your mother has always been there with you when you were a kid and was so helpless , she has protected you and cared for you the way no one can care. Dont forget this blessing and be grateful and kind to her.
    Last and most important, hide your mother's sin , dont expose it to anyone . leave this matter to Allah swt . Pray to Allah swt , his help is great.

  3. Tell your father asap.
    If you tell him soon, they can work on the marriage and sort things out.
    If you don't and this gets worse and worse - your mother could end up an adultress.
    Most likely she just likes attention.
    You have tried talking to her - its not working.
    Now talk to your father - he is the only one who can stop this in its tracks.

    • I can't talk to my dad
      He is an emotional man and has a quick temper
      I am afraid, he might divorce her.

      • That is still fine .Don't be in an environment of adultery and dirt .Tell your dad n tell him to solve this .You are risking your and your siblings characters and akhirat by keeping quiet .Be bold n send a message to your dad .

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