Islamic marriage advice and family advice

My Muslim boyfriend is no more… I want to embrace Islam

Day and night

I am going through a very confused stage of life now. My boyfriend was a Muslim but me a non Muslim. Recently he embraced martyred. We met on a social networking site but never could meet or talked over phone as he was too busy. Still whenever he got little free time also he would message me. Just after 6 months he was going to return from academy we were about say this to our families and get married. He was a miracle to my life because when i was in the wrong path of life, this guy just appeared as a blessing and dragged me near the allah(swt) again. He always told me that he wanted me to accept Islam so that he can see me in paradise & live together ever after & happily i was agreed too. But destiny again played a trick. When his belongings was returned to home, his parents found in his personal diary written 'my sweetest wife' thts all. No more clues. Now his family is searching who is the girl because as he had joined jammat & never interested in girl or look or follow any gals. About our relationship only his elder brother knows. But he fears to say about it to his parents. i accept that everything was allah's will to happen But now what shall I do to be with my love everafter because i cannot disobey his words as i followed his each words truely from heart. Now I have responsibility towards my family & relatives. I am only 21 yrs old. If I convert into Islam now they will reject me forever. My boyfriend is no more either everything could have been handled. Should i contact to his parents & let them know the truth? As i belongs from a strict hindu socity so its hard to deal. Honestly saying i waana be convert as i keep faith only in allah now but please suggest me what decisions I should take so that i can keep everyone happy..


Tagged as: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

7 Responses »

  1. You should only revert if you are convinced and not accept anything in return. Nor from him, his family or yours.
    Calling his family is not your responsability. If he wants to make you his wife, he will find a way to do it and tell his parents (or not).
    In islam he can also marry you without telling his family. Allowing dust to settle and thus allowing you both to live together Islamically.

    • I am sorry i think you have not got my post well... i have mentioned it that he embraced martyred... that means he is no more ie dead!

  2. Im so sorry to hear about your boyfriend, may Allah forgive him for his mistakes and grant him a place is Jannah.

    If your family is understanding, tell them first, they have the right to know. At least they won't feel betrayed by you. Fulfill your responsibilities as a daughter first, you know your family better. If they don't accept you then Allah will guide you since you are on the right path. Do what you feel is the right thing.
    I personally feel you shouldn't tell his family, you never know how they may react and treat you. Don't make it hard for yourself, you are already going through a lot.

    Think carefully, there's no rush and make a decision. You're 21, you can make desicion and support yourself too. Take care.

  3. Assalaamualaikum

    I'm so sorry for your loss. May Allah have mercy on him and grant him peace and comfort in the Hereafter.

    If you believe in your heart in Allah and that The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) is His final Messenger, then embracing Islam is the right thing to do. You can take the time you need with things like explaining Islam to your family (inshAllah if they get some information about Islam they may in time come to understand it and accept your decision) but it's important to do what's right for you, for this life and the next. It's important to make sure you have good support and reliable information about Islam, so I'd recommend visiting sites like, reading reputable books and visiting your local mosque to meet practising Muslim sisters who can inshAllah give you advice.

    You're already going through a lot, so I personally wouldn't add in the stress of contacting his family at this time. Maybe in the future they will come to find you, but right now you need to focus on your own healing and spiritual health. Make dua for them and trust that Allah will help you all heal.

    Midnightmoon editor

    • Thank you

      • assalam alaikum
        sister may allah grant him jannah and i personally suggest you that you should go to the islamic center to gave shahdah and accept islam by your own will and have any questions about islam???you should ask every questions about islam regarding any thing from ulema-e-hazrat where you lived.i pray for you and i should say that may allah gave all the happiness,prosperity and life full of contentment.may allah bless you.sister one thing you should always remember not all muslims are following islam and you should consider allah to to follow not any person.
        allah say that allah loves his mankind more than 70 mothers.when you feel alone,or in a state of despair remember allah is with you every time and every time you you should ask alllah any thing and allah gaves you any thing if not then will gave in much greater in day of judgement
        and grants you jannah where you can have any thing you far as this life is concern you should pray to allah that all of your family memebers embraced islam seriously if pray by heart inshallah allah will convert your whole family into should pray for your self and for all humankind.

Leave a Response