Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Need help with my husband

Angry husband, no love, husband turning away

Hello I've been married to my husband four years and we have two beautiful kids together. I found out my husband has been watching pornography on the Internet. When I confronted him he told me to not go through his stuff and that he is going to keep watching it. This is very devastating  to me as I do not know what to do except pray to the almighty  for guidance. I'm not sure who to talk to about this its just eating me up inside. I feel so disgusted and worthless as it is a form of cheating to me. He was not apologetic and straight out told me I shouldn't have been going through his stuff and we haven't been talking to each other for about 3 days. He refuses to give me an answer as to why he does that. I mean I do everything for this man - cook, clean, take care of his kids and house. Please help I think I'm going to go crazy.

love2

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10 Responses »

  1. wow , cooking , cleaning and taking care of your (which you make it seem like only his) kids is doing everything. Back to your question , let him know he is doing zina especially since he is married , try to change the wifi settings or give him a ultimatum , also ask a imaam what to do in this case since there are kids involved. Keep praying too. If things get worse and he becomes abusive then stay at your parents for a while or a family members house , if nothing works and things get out of hand seek divorce because he may never change and start abusing you

  2. Like any addiction, you can't just confromt the addict to go cold turkey. You have to wean him off slowly (baby steps). Most porn addicts, like other addicts, watch porn as an escape from the pressures of life e.g inadequacy in some area, feelings of failure, etc. Best thing a wife can do is be genuinely loving and supportive. (Fake it doesn't work). Share his hobbies/interests enthusiastically and no nagging. It will be hard and take time but the rewards will be so much sweeter.
    (P.S. Porn addiction is the biggest contributer to premature ejaculation and depression in men.)

    For Men: Get rid of porn. You'll last as long as you want and satisfy your women (women need 20-40 min to reach orgasm). You'll be the sexual dynamo that your woman can't get enough of. Owing to your new skill, you'll be more confident inside and outside the bedroom. With enough practice you can even have Multiple-Orgasms just like women. You'll appreciate your wife's figure more and sex will become a source of fun & adventure rather a source of depletion.

  3. OP: I'm not sure who to talk to about this its just eating me up inside. I feel so disgusted and worthless as it is a form of cheating to me. He was not apologetic and straight out told me I shouldn't have been going through his stuff and we haven't been talking to each other for about 3 days. He refuses to give me an answer as to why he does that. I mean I do everything for this man - cook, clean, take care of his kids and house. Please help I think I'm going to go crazy.

    It is not cheating....... he is not watching porn because you think you are worthless. His porn watching has nothing to do with you. He is just going for variety, looking at women who have body parts (like nose, boobs, hips) that have been altered by plastic surgery.

    STOP thinking he is watching porn because you are worthless.

    He may be watching porn to get sexually excited before he comes to you for sex.

    You found out he was watching porn, you might have seen a little bit of what he was watching too.

    Go talk to him. Ask him how he will feel if you also watch porn.

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