Islamic marriage advice and family advice

No love and mismatched sex drives…

no love, marriage without sex or intimacy

Assalam o AlaIkum

I need guidance,

If husband n wife have no love for each other, they don't get intimated, and this all frustration dragging lady to some sins, watching wrongs just to fulfilled her sexual desire, going out of marriage is not acceptable for her for any wrong acts, husband has some physical issues, what should she do to save her from watching wrong? Watching wrong is also forbidden in Islam, how that lady save her from frustrations and sin of watching wrong, her sexdrive is high and her husband has low sex drive ........ Is staying in marriage is important when they have one child from this marriage?

Area


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4 Responses »

  1. Salam alikom Area,

    I am in a similar situation but in my case, my husband has lots of love for me and so do I. Sadly, my sex drive is also high and his non existant. He never initiate and when I do, he gently turn me down. Sooo frustrating.. Thoughts of cheating crossed my mind but I can't act upon them thoughts. I am too scared of Allah and hurting him. But instead I release my frustration sometimes on him by being mean or short or snappy with him. Otherwise, I used to watch stupid, durty stuff to help me, almost on a daily basis. I was not happy with myself and turned to Allah. I would cry sometimes of frustration. I was not praying and I think shaytan got the best of me . I have asked Allah to help me. Started praying and stopped watching wrong stuff almost instantly. I am still frustrated but I am being patiente and I keep trying with my husband. I love him and I want to be patiente with him.
    Please turn to Allah as HE is truly the only guidance you need! Ask for HIS help and trust me HE won't let you down. Repent for your sins and ask Allah to give you patience. Try to create some romance with your husband.. You never know Allah might put love in both your hearts!

    Salam
    Sabrina

    • If this is the state of Muslim women who watch porn imagine what kind of brought up they will give to kids..when Base itself is wrong no doubt your new generation will be worst ...there is way of fasting described jn slam to control .
      .

  2. Sabrina: I am in a similar situation but in my case, my husband has lots of love for me and so do I. Sadly, my sex drive is also high and his non existent. He never initiate and when I do, he gently turn me down.

    How long you have been married? How old are you both? Did you husband ever had normal sex with you?
    Has your husband ever talk to a doctor or a sex therapist?

    Being mean or short or snappy with him is not going to change any thing. It could create problems.
    Try some thing different, taking shower together or doing touch massage without expecting any thing to happen.

  3. I don't know the exact situation because I do not know his age or if he has been like this with a low sex drive for long. Or when you had the baby maybe that caused some extra stress.I know having an extra mouth to feed can cause stress. And stress can cause a low sex drive. I wouldn't give up on the marriage. Tell him how you really need some intamacy to keep you happy. If he loves you he will be willing to do whatever it takes. You need to do the same for him. Pay it forward. Work on your friendship with him. Maybe there is a lack of closeness causing the issue. I have no idea. If you want tell us more so we know how to help you..

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