Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Oral Sex Between Husband and Wife

islamic guide

Dear Sir As Salam O Alaikum,

First of all thank you very much for maintaining such an excellent informative website for married persons like me who can not share their problems with others due to shyness. Believe me or not, me and my wife have learned alot from your website.

I am asking my very personal two questions :

Question No. 1

Could you please let me know can my wife give me oral sex using a condom?

Is there any harm in this?
I hope that this is also not restricted in Islam.

Question No. 02

Can you please let me know can I give her oral sex?

Sir, I am extremely in need of your reply. Please you must answer me.

Thank you in advance.

me.arshkhan


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11 Responses »

  1. Assalam alaikum,

    No one can make this decision for the both of you and there is no clear ruling on this.

    I suggest that you both search this topic both on this site and others.

    In particular, I suggest that you read:

    http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/clear-islamic-ruling-on-oral-sex-between-husband-and-wife/

    May Allah increase the love between you and your wife, Ameen.

  2. Hi brother, salaam, as long as you are married by a (Nikah) both partner can enjoy sex as they want as long as both are pleasing enough and playful enough without hurting your partner. whether oral or normal, do what both partner are agree and that your body want. don't let your free-mind get mix in to much of old culture and do not mix culture , traditions with religion.

    even in term of sexy or hot lingerie or any type of fantasy your dream to have .. feel free,.. the more you and our partner is having great fun and enjoy a lot.. the more angels is sending blessing on them.

    Make sure both want to enjoy new thing or thing where both want. never have sex like or force your partner into something she don't like and applied to her too.

    You're married in a halal way, so you are free and enjoy sex as both want. islam never mentioned any restriction about it.

    only some point that has mentioned that
    always keep clean
    have wuzu first is recommended
    and have sex in a way you dont hurt your partner.
    and do not go directly into penetration as islam said .. always be very playful a lot as you want and then enjoy..

    i have explain you everything clearly and directly with the most easiest way to understand it and i hope it will be helpful for you.

    if ever some short minded people or people who believe in traditions or bacward culture come to tell you dont do this or that, simply ask them proof by the reference from the quran with exact chapter & verse to verification. not only in sex but general.

    i know many people from india / pakistaan .bangladersh face these issue when it come to sex & islam since the way they have been grew up and have been taught. so by allah's help and this site, you have got the rightful information.

    May allah bless you in your couple and his blessing be upon you.
    regards
    Uzair

    • *the more you and our partner is having great fun and enjoy a lot.. the more angels is sending blessing on them.
      sorry i dont agree
      as it is not written in Quran so i dont agree with it. the duties of angels are something else not the duty to send blessings on the couples having intercourse. angels pray for the forgiveness of ahle imaan and they send blessings to the pious people and other Muslims like us.

      • Yep I agree with you, it was a stupid thing to say

        • Brother Uzair is essentially right. The more you and your halal partner are having great fun and enjoying a lot, the more the angels write down much rewards for you and ask for blessings and forgiveness from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala for the both of you.

          Having fun and enjoying with ones spouse is a charity and in fact, a form of dhikr (i.e. recognizing Allah's grace upon them and being grateful to Him for it by enjoying it). Being patient and avoiding haram fun and enjoyment before marriage isn't a small thing. Therefore, when Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala Has chosen you and blessed you with a halal spouse, then you need to feel relaxed, relieved, and celebrate such a great favor and grace of Allah with your spouse.

          Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says:

          ''But as for the favor of your Lord, report [it]''
          (Quran 93: 11)

          ''Say, "In the bounty of Allah and in His mercy - in that let them rejoice; it is better than what they accumulate."
          (Quran 10: 58)

          Also on the authority of Abu Dharr (RA):

          ''Some people from among the Companions of the Messenger of Allah (SAW) said to the Prophet (SAW), "O Messenger of Allah, the affluent have made off with the rewards; they pray as we pray, they fast as we fast, and they give [much] in charity by virtue of their wealth."

          He (SAW) said, "Has not Allah made things for you to give in charity? Truly every tasbeehah [saying: ‘subhan-Allah’] is a charity, and every takbeerah [saying: ‘Allahu akbar’] is a charity, and every tahmeedah [saying: ‘al-hamdu lillah’] is a charity, and every tahleelah [saying: ‘laa ilaha illal Allah’] is a charity. And commanding the good is a charity, and forbidding an evil is a charity, and in the bud’i [sexual act] of each one of you there is a charity."

          They said, "O Messenger of Allah, when one of us fulfills his carnal desire will he have some reward for that?"

          He (SAW) said, "Do you not see that if he were to act upon it [his desire] in an unlawful manner then he would be deserving of punishment? Likewise, if he were to act upon it in a lawful manner then he will be deserving of a reward." (by Muslim 1674).

        • It was a truthful thing to say. Nothing stupid about it at all whatsoever.

          Thank you brother Uzair--JazakAllah.

      • It does not state in the Quran the details of how to pray five times a day, nor does it give specific instructions on how to do wudu, does that mean that you don't know how to pray or how to do wudu then since it is not in the Quran?

        Please read the following from http://islamqa.info/en/4536.

        Imaam al-Nawawi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:

        “The phrase, ‘Having intercourse is a charity’ – the word bud’ (translated here as ‘having intercourse’) may mean intercourse, or it may refer to the private part itself…

        This indicates that permissible actions may become acts of worship, if there is a sincere intention. Intercourse may be an act of worship if the intention behind it is to fulfil the rights of one's wife, to treat her kindly as enjoined by Allaah, to seek a righteous child, to keep oneself or one’s wife chaste, to prevent both partners from looking towards or thinking of haraam things, and other good intentions. ‘O Messenger of Allaah, if one of us fulfils his desire, is there reward in that?’”

        (Sharh Muslim, 7/92)

      • I agree with Saba , UZZY and Issah. there is absolutely no problem in saying this. Thanks Sister Saba and Issah for quoting such beautiful references.

        Sister LoreleiLee always have some issues with some commentator here

    • Thanks you all, those tho got me wrong, i would advise them stop listening any other .. but start believe in real scripture and eyes witness.. an imaam is here to advise but it not meant they are saying the truth.. the truth start with your logic and your eyes to understand the true from the holy book.

      Some imaam say having sex like porn is haraam! this is not haram! lets use our logic, first nothing about porn has been said in the quran, so any couple are free to have oral sex or like porn or how they like, Pornography is just a word.. it is not a way of sex or an style of sex, Remember sex came first then pornography , Pornography meant Sex without nika, or sex with many at the time.

      Thanks

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