IslamicAnswers.com: Islamic Advice

Salaam.. I'm a 23 year old Bangladeshi girl living in USA .. I started uni on 2013, met this guy in 2014, he's 22.,  . I've been with him for 2 years ( I know it's wrong but please only Allah swt can judge me).. I told my parents about him this June. And they disagreed cuz he's from different caste and that he's international student - they think he's using me for a UK visa.. Which he's not cuz he's genuinely a really nice brother.. I 've been living he'll since June. My parents have tried kicking me out the house, saying it's that you marry him and you'll be disowned or leave him and marry who we say.. I've made lots of dua that Allah softens my parents heart. Showed patience and sabr. But right now, in tired of living life like this.. I'm not disrespecting them in any way I can't be normal to them, like I was before.. I stay in my room all day, go work, come back and room again.. It hurts so much that my parents are so into their pride that they can't see my happiness..

My mum had spoken to his mum just cuz my grandma said, there's no harm in talking to them.. But since I've told my parents, all they say is he's from lahore in Pakistan and people from there are so cunning. They're like snakes, that can never be trusted.. My dad knows this person and he's from lahore and he's a bad character. They're generalising them, like everyone from a specific region are bad people cuz a few individuals they know from there are corrupt..

I don't want to leave my family and nor can I imagine myself marrying someone I don't love.. It taunts me to think of sharing a bed with someone im not attracted to. And I know, I'll learn to love eventually but why shall I sacrifice my happiness in that way. I've always obeyed them in all sense, listened to everything they want. I've kept their respect amongst the community and everyone knows me as the good girl and nothing else.. This has really affected me, I feel so down everyday, thinking that one day or another I'll be sharing a bed with someone I have no desire to be with.. It's traumatising..

I want to be happy again. Like I was before :(.. But still I say Alhamdulillah for everything cuz I could've had it much worse.. I'd understand if they met the brother then spoke faults about him but they're judging him purely based on how other people are from that region of Pakistan- which is so unfair on me.. They've got no Islamic reason to say no, they talk about Islam like they doing right by Allah but they're not.. They're convincing me to say yes to a man they choice. Even though I've said no many times.. My mum showed me this brothers pic and said to me that I shouldn't let her down this time and should make them happy.. But what about my happiness 🙁 I said no and told her that she can't force me to marry anyone I do not wish, she agreed and said I'll never force. But in a way, they are forcing me.. I'm just scared of what the future holds, I know Allah is the best of planners but sometimes I wish I know what Allah has planned.. and the brother that I'm with is bearing all this, my mother bad mouths him and his family so much it's unbelievable. yet he's still with me. my mum calls them animals, bad people, cunning and all sorts. but he's stuck his ground. though now he's showing that he's more stressed about this situation.. he was before but didn't show it as much.. he's a practicing Muslim and prays, obligatory and voluntary at times..

I dunno if I mentioned earlier but his parents are happy and want me to marry their son.. They're very supportive and his mum is saying that I can always go there if I needed an escape.. But I don't think I'll ever do that cuz I'll have no respect in their eyes and my parents respect will go down the drain.. I'm just so confused in what to do.. I don't want to marry anyone else.. I've tried my best to make my parents understand but they're so blind in what makes me happy..

My father and mother whom I love the most, I do still love them dearly cuz they've done so much for me in my life.. But my dad don't pray, very occasionally he does, for instance eid prayer.. And my mother prays sometimes, fajr.. She said to me, the namaz (prayers) you pray to your Allah won't ever be accepted.. It hurts so much that my own mum said that to me..

Them refusing is nothing but worldly desires.. Like they're not thinking and going by Islam and using the proper way as to how to get married shown by prophet muhhamed (may peace be upon him).

I'm so tired of this.. And confused :(..I've repented for all my mistakes and want Allah to soften my parents heart.. I feel depressed.. any advice would be appreciated..  ithink I forgot to mention that he's international and is currently studying at university..  I have graduated and am currently working in a decent pay job, passed driving.. JUST WANT TO MAKE THINGS HALAL ASAP, I'M TIRED OF BEING IN A HARAAM RELATIONSHIP..

My mother just bad mouths me all the time, she goes. I pray to Allah that I live long so I can see you suffer all your life.. and I pray to Allah you cry all your life. and rude stuff like that 🙁 she's so harsh with her words.  she also said, if you're like this cuz of your lover then run away, I don't care.. like what mother says that to her daughter. I'm so tired of this

Regards,
Some girl