Islamic marriage advice and family advice

How can I get rid of my habit of watching porn as it’s haram in Islam

Assalam O Alaikum,

wudu

"God loves those who repent and who purify themselves" (Surah al-Baqarah, Ayah 222

I watch porn between 2 to 3 months period and during this time my sexual desire rises to the fullest for which I want to have sex. So, I watch porn in order to quench away this sexual desire and when ever I do that it really helps me to over come those sexual desires.

Now that I have learned that Islam is against it; I want to stop and I don't know what to do. please help me because I don't want to have sex until marriage as Islam instructs.

~ Mancialex.


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16 Responses »

  1. Brother i used to watch porn for a very long time but now have stopped it completely for past 6 months approx. 1. First thing u need to stop watching porn is that remeber that allah is watching u always. So with what dignity will u face allah. Think about it. 2. Have fear in allah.
    3. Get married if possible. 4. Stop going online or if at all u need to go online go and watch some oinspirational islamic videos so that ur mind comes out of porn. 5. Pray regularly 6. Engage in activities so that u are not alone. These are the thing which i had done. Hope it helps. May allah help you to get rid of this habit.

  2. Thank you brother I will follow your advice and may Allah change me to become better person then I was before ameen
    I will repent to Allah is forgive and love forgive people alhamdulilah

  3. * Please read "Maidens of Paradise" (Jannah), available at: (http://www.islamfactory.com/books/) carefully and start pondering to change your mindset. Keep reading it after few weeks/months to refresh your newly established mindset.

    * Please repent to Allah sincerely to pardon you and help you to turn back from pornography.

    * Start working for Islam the way you are able to do.

    * Start reading Quran in your mother tongue to understand meaning of its verses.

    * Give charity.

    * Start working good deeds.

    You are on your way to becoming a great person!! InshaAllah.

    Please share the tips with others extensively. It will be great work indeed.

    • Thanks Brother,, I am devotee of Lord *Krishna, I really find happy and charged to get over this Sin.. This knowledge of Pure Koran is for all really.

  4. Salam! Alaikum! Am having same problem of addiction, pls I need help. I really want to stop it cox it's bugging me , pls can anyone help me do that. Thank you

  5. This is a very great effort indeed.May Alllah Almighty help all the muslim ummah to learn lesson from it and convert their life according to the teaching of the Holy Prophet(P.B.U.H).It is a very hard exam and decision but if the will is strong then Allah helps that person.JAZAK-ALLAH

  6. It's hard being a teenager and trying to resist the images you're bombarded with daily: the hot-looking guy or gal in the magazine; the sexual jokes in movies (even Shrek!) or the pervasive pornography and ad banners that pop up while you may simply be checking your e-mail or researching something for school. How do we protect ourselves from all of this? Below is a list of tips that can help. You can add in comments what works for you:

    Tip #1: Know what's Halal and what's not

    Remember this rule of thumb: whatever is Haram (forbidden) to do, is Haram to watch.

    All scholars of Islam agree that pornography is absolutely Haram and a clear sin.

    Some may think, however, that only hard-core pornography is Islamically unacceptable. This is not true. Watching improperly dressed men and women in sexual situations, as well as engaged in various types of foreplay and dirty jokes are also not acceptable.

    If you need a more detailed argument against it, read our article based on the Quran and Hadith.

    Tip #2: Surf the Web or Watch T.V. When Others are Around

    The living room or study room are better places to keep the computer since others are nearby and can see what you're looking at. The temptation to sneak a look at dirty pictures or that bikini-clad babe is heightened when you're alone in your room watching television or surfing the internet. Try to avoid late night TV and surfing. Instead, check out the tube or the web when others are around so you can resist the urge to sneak a peek, thinking no one's watching.

    It is a good idea not to have a TV or computer in the bedroom anyway.

    Tip #3: Remember Allah is Watching You

    If no one is watching, Allah is watching you. He is always there. He is Al Baseer, All Knowing and All Aware. He is the One Who has given us life. He is the One Who has told us right from wrong and given us a choice. He loves to see us successful in our test to bless us with the Everlasting life. He does not rest or sleep. He loves to see us do good and has promised rewards for it.

    Tip #4: If It Happens, Seek Forgiveness & Don't Insist on doing it

    "É[Good people are those who] when they have committed a shameful deed (fuhsha) or have harmed themselves, remember God and pray that their sins be forgiven-for who but God could forgive sins?-and do not knowingly persist in doing whatever wrong they may have done." (Quran 3:135).

    Allah loves to see us asking for His forgiveness.

    Tip #5: Just get up and leave

    If you feel unable to control looking at the screen or the magazine, leave the situation. Get out of the living room, your bedroom where the internet is or where you've been reading the magazine. Take a walk. Just do something to physically get out of the situation.

    Tip #6: Remember the Day of Judgment

    You cannot assume looking at this stuff is no big deal. Your eyes will testify about what you looked at on the Day of Judgment. God is Most Just and Merciful, and He rewards us for the good and holds us responsible for the bad we do. His angels are around you who love to note down each good dead and hate to watch you do shameful things which they still must report. Every tiny act we do is noted down. May Allah make our accounting on the Day of Judgment easy.

    Tip #7: Connect With Your Salat

    If you are not praying, start now. Salat actively discourages pornography and fornication (fuhsha). Here is what Allah says about it: "É and be constant in prayer: for, behold, prayer restrains man from loathsome deeds and from all that runs counter to decency; and remembrance of God is indeed the greatest [good]. And God knows all that you do." (Quran 29:45)

    If you are not satisfied with the quality of your prostration in prayer, work on it. If Salat is not helping you, work on uplifting your salat. ..Innas salata tanha anil fahsha wal munkar..

    Tip #8: Learn About Haya in Islam

    Haya is a beautiful concept in Islam. Sometimes translated as modesty or shame, there is no one word in English that fully describes what it means. It is a quality in character that makes a believer shine. Satan does not want you to have it. Pornography destroys Haya. Here's an article which helps explain this concept of Haya in Islam.

    Tip #9: Avoid those involved in pornography

    If one of your friends is into pornographic magazines, websites, dirty jokes etc. either help him/her change through gentle and sincere advice (see etiquettes of enjoining the good and forbidding the evil) or abandon frequent contact with them. Their addiction might affect you, so it's best to stay as far away as possible, by remembering the danger to yourself and your relationship with God.

    Tip #10: Avoid things that lead to sin

    Too often, it's easy to dismiss that billboard with the spandex-and-bikini-top-clad blonde girl advertising gum, or the guy in tight leather pants and no shirt advertising perfume. When you see it, remember the omnipresent God, and lower your gaze. Do the same for television and the internet. If you keep doing this, it'll become a habit to avoid looking at these things.

    Remember God is kind. An unintentional look is not Haram if you turn away as soon as you realize it.

    Tip #11: Develop a More Productive Schedule

    Learn to manage your time more productively. Develop a personal plan for yourself. If you don't occupy your mind with good works, Satan will think of something bad for you. Think of wal Asr, Innal insane lafi khusr.. (Quran 103)

    Tip #12: Are You Involved?

    Surround yourself with spiritual influences. Join a study circle, volunteer for a good cause, become active in a Muslim youth group like MYNA or your Muslim Students' Association. Good company is likely to have good influence on you. The involvement will also make good use of your time, sparing little for Satan.

    Tip #13: Feeling overwhelmed? Remember Allah

    In situations where you feel overwhelmed and can't get yourself to switch the channel, close the browser window or turn your eyes away from the billboard, ask Allah's help. You don't necessarily need any heavy duty, long prayers. Just say La hawla wa la quwwata illa billah (there is neither power nor strength except with God). It is short, simple and reminds you of Who is really in control and can help you out of this. Or if you cannot remember this, just move away saying Allah, Allah. Or bring any popular song about Allah to your lips.

    Tip #14: Less TV is better

    Although actors in a TV program may be "dressed," if the show is about playing sexual games in public, is it worth watching? Less TV is always better. One of my American friends calls it the 19-inch Satan in our living rooms. She would rather not have it at all. A few broadcast channels are better than cable or satellite. Watching together as family is better than watching alone. Choosing through a TV guide what to watch is better than channel surfing.

    Tip #15: Satan is the Enemy: Seek refuge in God

    Satan lured you into this mess. He is the big part of our tests in this life. Seeking refuge in Allah (saying Aoutho billahi minash Shaytan ir Rajeem), will help you resist him and his whisperings to continue looking at the material.

    Tip #16: Remember others will Follow You

    If you have younger brothers and sisters, think of the bad example you're setting for them. What message are you sending them if they barge into your room and catch you watching Temptation Island or flipping through Playboy magazine?

    Tip #17: Look for alternative entertainment

    Playing sports is better for your health than watching. We have become way too dependent on electronic entertainment. It is unhealthy and leading our nation to obesity and health problems. Let's stop being couch potatoes. Let's build our bodies through sports and outdoor activities.

    Tip #18: Surround yourself with the Quran

    Make the Quran a part of your bedroom decor. Put paintings of your personal selection of these beautiful verses from God. Maybe commission a calligrapher to scribe your favorite verses in Arabic and English. I had one drawn with pencil and it sits in front of my desk. One of my daughters asked me to write one for her and she hung it up in front of her laptop.

    How many copies and translations of the Quran do you own? Buy more. Become a collector.

    If you are into listening the Quran on audio, keep changing your reciter of the Quran. It breaks the monotony and brings focus back to the words of God.

    Tip #19: Remember your Mom and sister

    Disgusting right? Exactly. No one in his right mind would look at his mom or sister the way pornographic magazines and websites depict women. Remember your mom and your sister, and that may help you stop.

    Tip #20: Have someone watch over you

    If you really feel you're becoming addicted to this kind of material, try to watch TV, surf the internet with someone else. You don't have to tell them why you're doing this, but this method can perhaps keep you in check and help you avoid looking at pornography or other similar material. After all, Satan tempts us most easily when we're alone. Sitting in the company of a family member or trusted friend will help.

    Tip #21: Fasting helps

    The Prophet Muhammad advised us to fast to cool passions. This should be a method we use to handle the desire aroused by pornography and similar material. Peace and blessings of Allah be upon the Prophet.

    Tip #22: Life is full of tests

    We human beings are weak people. We sometimes make mistakes. We are not perfect. When you fail, don't despair. You can get away from sin by defeating a Satanic suggestion the next time around. Sometimes we don't mean to watch but end up doing it anyway. But as soon as a thought comes to your mind that you are doing wrong, stop right there. If you persist, that will be become a sin which you have chosen intentionally.

    Don't feel guilty if you did not plan to watch it. Sometimes the web and email technology force this filth on you. Just move away as fast as you can.

    Tip #23: Get Married

    Yes. You heard me right. Get married. The real thing is better than the fakeness of pornography which destroys you mentally, physically, and spiritually. In Muslim families, we see many younger people getting married while they are still in school. Texas law allows persons as young as 13 to get married with parental consent and a judge's order. Other states require at least 16 years of age for a marriage license. Talk to your parents. I am personally against very young people marrying, but it is certainly better than them having sinful relationships with each other or with the fictional characters brought to them through the web, magazines and films. There is no shame in talking to your parents and Imams about it. Make a decision with Shura if you want to get married early.

    Marriage helps you overcome the destructive directions of a blessing of God called sex.

    Tip #24: Use technology to help

    There are many filters and spam stopping technologies which are available through different internet providers as well as for your email client. Use technology to close doors for pornography, a heinous crime against humanity.

    Tip #25: It is not a Sin if you did not mean it

    Sometimes we are just surfing the internet and something else pops up. It may show up in emails despite all the filters. As long as you did not mean to watch and move away immediately it is not a sin. Thank God, Alhamdu lillah. He does not hold us accountable for unintentional things.

    Tip #26: Do Tauba, Repent and Return to Allah

    He loves to see us come back. If you do end up watching the bad stuff, repent to Allah. Seek His forgiveness, reaffirm your faith in Him, and do good deeds to compensate for what you've done. He is All-Forgiving as long as you are sincere.

    Tip #27: Repent Again and Fine Yourself

    If you lapse, repent again. God is All-Forgiving as long as we mean it. But then you need to discipline yourself by promising that if you do it again, you will pay this much in charity or fast for a day.

    The message is: don't give up on yourself. Keep trying. Struggle is life. Satan can get you down, but you can and will beat him with God's help if you are serious about changing.

    Tip #28: Pray, Pray and Pray

    Never underestimate the power of prayer. Dua is the essence of worship. You connect to God through prayers. Talk to Him. He listens. While there, pray for this author and Sound Vision as well.

    Tip #29: Fight Against Pornography

    You will be blessed in your struggle if you speak and fight against pornography. It is not one person's problem. It is a problem that is hurting many people.

    May God bless you.

    Peace.

  7. First of all get rid of all the porn material like vids , comics , site etc etc
    After that induldge in extra cirricular activities , try 2 be in a company where sex talk is less(its difficult )

    Try 2 offfer namaz 5times , coz ull always think of being pure , n that will help u keep away from porngraphy which ultimately leads 2 masturbation(unless u married)

    Its hard but u can try 2 atleast avoid it

    • sir u are write . i dont want to hide it . i once asked by my school; fr to watch sex pics and vid / i watched every characters sex pic i know . but when i heared thats too huuge gunnah , then i want to get rid of it , i dont watch porn videos , niether i sit perverts , but the problem is when ever i took bath and tried to wash my thing than suddenly bad thoughts came into my mind , and put it out , the thing

      i told all yhis to you because your talk convinced me .. i request u to tell me the solution and please keep it a secret
      jazakallah

  8. Brother Manciale,.wa alaykum as-salam,

    Hope this Hadith describes you All if you wise enough to understand and Allah given you knowledge to understand.

    Hadith - Bukhari 3:129, Narrated 'Alqama

    While I was walking with 'Abdullah May Allah's peace and praise be on him he said, "We were in the company of the Prophet May Allah's peace and praise be on him and he said, 'He who can afford to marry should marry, because it will help him refrain from looking at other women, and save his private parts from committing illegal sexual relation; and he who cannot afford to marry is advised to fast, as fasting will diminish his sexual power.'"

    • sir can u please define me this a little easily ... im sorry but cuz i have the same issue unlukily . i request u to tell me in easy words
      jazakallah

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