I am eight months pregnant, three kids and he beats me.
ASA everyone
You know i know what I need to do but still I have to get it off. As i am sleeping with the enemy! I really don´t love him anymore or care for him. Sometimes i even pray he dies because of all the pain I am and have taken from him. I hate him, he abuses me in front of my kids all the time he walks around the house hardly working or doing anything for anyone except himself, he loves himself and his own company.
I´m just to take care of his sexual desires, he beats me on everything said or done. I know i am not perfect that i have faults but i am human and i have my fourth child inside me 8 months pregnant and still getting treated like crap everyday. I have two kids from my first marriage who live with us and I have to see them taking this mans mental abuse on them, day by day, I can´t handle it but i just always hope and pray that maybe one day someone will help me get out or encourage me.
By allah, I don´t want him in my life, whatever is left of me I want to give it all to my kids ia. He is crazy and needs help but I would not spite on him anymore, his parents know what he does to me and they still ask me to give him a chance.
Today, I am not asking anyone for anything but encouragement to get out I leave for uk in 5 days. InshaAllah hopping to never look back. if any of u are out there however you need to keep me strong and encourage me to raise my kids alone and stay away from this horrible person with his dirty porn habits please do so.
jzk for listening to me awaiting for your support ia.
s.f
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Allahamdulilaah sister may Allah (swt) bless you and your children and give you the strength to get to the other side of this nightmare you and your little ones have had to suffer, children see every thing may Allah take away the hurt and pain they have see you go through, run and dont look back inshaallah khayr.
Ameen to your prayer.
María
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
As salamu alaykum sister sf,
Alhamdulillah, I am sure you will have the support you need to raise your kids in a healthy enviroment in the UK, Insha´Allah.
Do you have family that will receive you and your little ones and will help you during and after delivery?
Your kids need you and you have lots of love to give to them and that love will guide you to the best to protect them and yourself, Alhamdulillah.
Don´t show your intentions to this man, don´t tell anyone, just your family if you trust they won´t tell anything to him. Be these five days as always, you will be safe once you are in the UK, meanwhile try to act as normally, just in case he turns more agressive, Allah(swt) forbids.
Please, stay calm, don´t make big efforts, don´t carry too much weight, make it the easier you can, you are in a very advance stage of pregnancy, please take care.
Insha´Allah, my Heart and my prayers will be with you and your kids during this week, I will pray Allah(swt) protects all of you and eases all the ways for all you to arrive to a safer place where you will be well received and loved, Insha´Allah.
Do you want one of our Senior Editors to contact you, she is from the UK.? She may offer you much more practical advice than mine. Please let us know if you need us.
From Heart to Heart,
María
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
May Allah keep u safe from your abusive husband & make it easy on both you & your kids to get away from this abusive relationship with your husband. May you come out strong emotionally and may your kids be protected by Him. None of you deserve abuse, may you find the strength to get out & find someone who will be able to take care of you and your kids. Ameen.
Sister Shy,
I read many, many posts but yours has actually brought me to tears. I cannot understand why a man would behave this way with his wife...the mother of his children!
Inshallah the five days you speak of will go by quickly. I admire you and your strength and courage to do what you need to do to be safe and keep your children safe. I lived in the United Kingdom for six years and I know for a fact that there is a lot of support that you can find for you and your children, you just need to ask.
May Allah Almighty keep you and your young safe, may no more harm come to you or them and may Allah deliver the justice this man deserves who calls himself your husband...amin.
Salam
Jzk everyone for ur support. My family dont have a clue about what i have been going through I hope i find the well to speak to someone in my family when i get thr ia. however I would like to get incontact with someone out thr so if anyone is able to provide me with someones contact or so on I would be very grateful.
once again jzk
As salamu alaykum, my beloved Sister Firdous,
I let know Sister Z, she will contact you, insha´Allah.
May Allah(swt) bless you and keep you strong through all this process. Ameen.
María
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
today i found out that the judge has declined my request. let me explain. I live in the uae, dubai have been for the last few years I got a divorce from my ex and married the monster. whatever has been happening in the house no one has been aware. my ex got married a year ago since then he has been very difficult to deal with. He cut the kids money down, is asking for custordy of the kids and has also a case against me for being harsh towards him and his wife. see in uae u can make a case on telling someone to shut up.... see the amount of cases i could have open against him would be out of the world however i havent because i was pregnant and really didnt want to waist my time. anyhow the courts have my passport and wont release it unless someone else would give thr passport and take power of attorney. it would be just one hearing and all fine i was told because its not a big deal. my husband was suppose to take the power of attorney and release my passport but he has done nothing in the last week but sworn at me and abuised me. so i requested that the judge moves my date to this week so i can get my passport and go but as i said he declined it. the judge is in tommorrow again i will approach him and then see if he will forward my case but i only have 3 working days to play with. I am so hurt and upset i told my husband that i dont want to talk to him or be around him anymore. because i keep on telling him that swearing all the time and at the kids on a daily Allah will take away all the baraqa away from us and anything we have or dont have. however he never accepts this and continues. I called his father asked him to come down and i dont want to continue seeing him untill i find a way of getting out. they will be coming this evening but i know they will take his side 101 % of the time but i told them i would go to the british embarssy or call the police but i refuse to continuhe with him under one roof. By Allah i am so hurt today and disappointed I feel soooo stuck im 8 months pregnant and have no way out.... what do i do i'm trying to be strong but if i dont get out in the next week no airline will accept me.... I dont know why i am sharing all this but I cant do it anymore thr has to be more to life thr has to be a way out to happiness. someone help me please.
As salamu alaykum, sister Firdous,
Don´t give up, stay firm, you have other opportunity, trust Allah(swt) whatever He(swt) has for all of you will be the best, sister believe, trust blindly Allah(swt) have faith in Him(swt) He knows all the ways, just surrender to Allah(swt), accept what happened today as a part of the test and act doing your best until the last moment walking to the direction you are being guided, have Allah(swt) all the time in you, you try once and again, Insha´Allah.
Bismillah, your head need to be cold at this time, talk calm and quiet, ask Allah(swt) to help you, you will see an inner force that you have never have experienced before, Allah(swt) listen to those that stay firm and straight on the straight Path.
My prayers still with you, Alhamdulillah. Ask Allah(swt) in the silence of your Heart for the Peace you need to go through this struggles, you will have it, insha´Allah.
María
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Subhan'Allah sister you are being tested, is their no friend or relative you can go to and stay with? you say his father is coming ask to go to his house if your mother inlaw is their your husband cant object to that you need to get away from this abusive man, and you need to stay calm so he can not portary you as some crazy hormonal women, you have dealt with alot over the years and are a very strong women Maasha'allah, do not see this judge having your passport as the end of the world if you have your child in the uae then so be it, take a deep breath and look to Allah (swt) i am nearly 8 mts preg myself and stressed too but it is not good for you or your child aswell as your other children they dont need to see you falling apart stay strong, insha'Allah dont give yourself this false deadline that if you dont get on that plane its the end of the world its not.
no one can encourage or give you real peace but true god . Search for true love and true god . look in to the sky and say "please god show me your real face ?and show who you are ?and save me from this situation, i will live for you and will be truth full for you till end of my life "
I think you already know what to do, I understand that it must be scary with kids to leave him but think about this. What kind of example are you setting for your kids? violent relationship most of the time end up pretty bad and sometimes even tragic. If a man can abuse you mentally or physically in front of your children and to top it all of you are pregnant. You need to have mercy on your kids and on yourself and get out of this situation. Even maybe until he gets help if he know that he has issues meanwhile take care of your kids and yourseld. The kids are the victims they did not ask to be born you make those decisions so you should be woman enough to take care of them out them first and get yourself out of this mess before it ends up traggic.
Good luck and pray to Allah for guidance and help Inc Allah
Subhan'allah sister, I am sure that you know what to do. This guy is a monster and you need to get away from him, he doesnt deserve your love or the love of your children. Please sister dont fall apart, because you cannot get your passort insha'allah you will find a way out. Stay calm, think of other options. We understand that you are going through a rough time in life, but know that this is not the end of the world.
Secondly, why dont you try to talk to your family about your pain and hurt. Maybe they can tell your husband to leave the house for the time being untill you sort yourself out, or have your baby. Sister please dont suffer in silence, make your problem everyonee's problem, because you have children. Just as much as you are hurt they are hurt too. .
and also I dont really know how the UAE goverment work, i dont even understand why the judge is holding your passport, is it because your ex-husband has filed a case against you. If that is the case, and you are British go the the Embassy. but know that they Embassy wont be able to put you on a flight to the UK unless there is paper evidence, like a letter from the police that your husband is being violent, and your life is in danger. But trying you luck, insha'allah they might be able to direct you.
Sister, my thought are with you, and you will be in my prayers. May Allah guide you and help you in this stressful period. Insha'allah. Dont lose faith in Allah, life is a test..... and everything happens for a reason