Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Premarital relationships

True Love

Aoa to whoever is listening out there.

I have a strange issue. I dont want to be judged i want to be helped, i've also asked for forgiveness from Allah over a thousand times, problem is i still feel unsatisfied.

Im a teenager and i was in a relationship with a guy 2 years ago. Initially we just talked and did nothing wrong whatsoever. He promised me so many things. Every thing a girl can want from a future partner, he promised me that. Then eventually he got to talking about getting intimate and having intercourse and i was initially very hesitant but i somehow started playing along too. But we only flashed each other and sent provocative pictures. He insisted on meeting up but I always denied and came up with an excuse cause i was never comfortable with all of this. I only did it in fear of losing him and he eventually broke up with me. It was a rough patch for me idk about him. But even after that we talked and in the same way.

When we were together we used to talk about intimate things and other things. But after the break up he only talked to me about sex and i felt so disrespected and guilty. I tried to stay faithful to Allah to my beliefs and to my family. But the flashing didnt end. What do i do? We broke up after a year of dating and things continued in a worse manner even after the break up.

Now all of a sudden he said he had to talk to me about something and he needs me in his life. He said this after 2 weeks of no contact. Now he's all 'im gonna go pray get back to you in a bit' . Yes i pray too but i dont show it off. Also he wont tell me his issue anymore. Like why has he suddenly transformed. How do i be the bigger person here? I wanna tell him everything and that how awful i felt doing all of this. But being a guy he can gt his ego hurt and avenge me and i dont want that


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2 Responses »

  1. You know what you did was wrong in Islam
    I don't even have to go into detail as to why.

    Let me tell you something

    a guy is going to tell you anything you want to hear just to get in bed with you

    They are going to make a million and one promises

    it is a fact and it's been going around ever since man has been on Earth

    and has learned to talk

    it doesn't matter what they say

    they don't care for you (or any other girl)
    especially at such a young age

    they only want sex and that's it

    That doesn't mean there's something wrong with you

    that's just how it is

    they do that to dozens of other girls

    it's nothing new

    it's not rocket science

    He's a teenager he doesn't have the sense to Know What Love Is

    he only knows what lust is

    and it's only going by hormones

    the same thing for a girl

    You have to be smart and not fall for that trap

    Forgive me for saying this but

    only an idiot would send nude photos to other people

    that is a very stupid Act

    because pictures like that can be sent to millions of people
    in only a matter of seconds

    you have to use your common sense and ask your self,

    "if I would not want other people to see this photo then, why am i showing it to a person?"

    Even if you are married don't take nude pics and show it to your husband

    How do you know he won't change his feelings towards you tomorrow?

    And in revenge show others your nude pics or try to blackmail you with them?

    It happens every day

    The guy breaking up with you is only proof that he was using you

    plain and simple

    don't try looking for another guy at this age

    you will find that they are all the same

    because they are young and stupid

    that is just how it works and you can't change it no one can change it

    If that guy ever contact you again block him and don't talk to him

    if he contacts you that only shows that the other girl he was with dumped him or
    He got bored with her

    and he is only using you
    because he has nothing else to do

    you are basically a second choice

    You are not in this world for someone's entertainment and time-pass

    you are in this world because you have talents and you wish to pursue them

    you have value

    I don't care how many times I guy says:
    "I was wrong
    I have seen the error of my ways
    I want to make it up to you...."

    these are all dialogues used again and again

    these are the same things they are always going to use

    ignore him and he will eventually go away

    Don't be an idiot to fall for the same trap again

    This is the time when you have to concentrate on your education

    this is the time where you have to concentrate on becoming a better person

    and a better Muslim

    this is not the time for relationships

    that will come when your education is over and you are a full grown adult

    Don't be an idiot stay away from the bad
    And keep up with the good.

    Don't. Be.An.Idiot.Again.

    Good luck

  2. Dear sis, PLEASE BE AWARE 🙂
    GUYS ARE LIKE THIS:) TRUST ME 🙂 i was like you at once:) .... guys only WANT U FOR one thing, is their sexual desires. 🙂 .. DONT FALL into the path of the SHAITAN ,, there is noooo point:) ... YOU NEED TO FOCUS ON your imaan:) and your studies or whatever.. There are many other things in this world important like respecting your parents, obeying them, taking care of them,, Doing charity..entering islamic clubs, forums,, going to masjid.. learning our islamic faith even more besides wasting our time in stupid things like boys. ... Falling into bad things is just waste of life:) .. if the guy really loves you then:) talk to him about marriage instead of talking with him just wasting your time:).. There is no point:) .. We all like to be loved, feeling special, and all that... but it should be your husband:) thats why this thing was allowed to be married:)
    so please use your mind wisley and get out of this trap.. ::) i been through this situation and now i repent and u should , DONT EVER let a guy use YOU LIKE THAT:) WE ALL have to die:) remmeber that,,,, we will be punished in our grave.. 🙂
    best of luck,,

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