Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Rejected by the woman I love – I want to DIE…

despair

Suicide is not the answer.

i'm a born hindu.... i'm of 19 years now... for past many years, i never actually believed in god.... when i was in 18 i attempted for suicide because i fell in love or affection to be exactly, and i couldn't get it... i tried several suicide attempts back then..... and all failed... few months later i realized i was wrong, i shouldn't have done that, its not even love..... it was just an infatuation....a temporary affection...

anyways, after a year, i met this girl, she was islamic... the most beautiful soul i've ever known. or for me the most beautiful soul ever existed, we became friends, and then i feel in love with her, for many months i tried to think that is it love... later i got my answer yes it is..... i just know it is..... i'm so selfless for her.... i always wanted her happiness, i still do... this is because of her that i started to believe in ALLAH, she didnt asked me to do that, and i didnt even told her yet that i'm secretly following islam, it was just that as my love for her begins my love for allah begins too. I dont know what it is, but now i honestly do believe in ALLAH.

I still dont know how to read quran, i honestly dont know how to pray too, I just try to say my problems to ALLAH, i believe that allah is the only god, he is the one. I know this is not umm... u know, but I dont know, its just all new to me, i dont know how to pray, i know nothing, i just know this thing that I believe in ALLAH and my love more than anything. I then decided to convert.... but i dont know how to do that.... I tried seeking help through internet, doesnt help much..

anyways, its not the problem, the problem is.. when I told this girl about my feelings, she denied... of course its totally her choice. I respect that. but I still love her, and for me love is like, I cant love any other, i just cant.... i selflessly love her, I want that she starts loving me too, but what I want most is her happiness, and feel like when she thinks about my feelings she doesnt like them, she is kind, still she is my friend, but she asked me to kill my feelings for her, i dont know how to kill my feelings, maybe by killing myself... It's just that I want her happiness, and I dont know why, I want my death too....

I know suicide is not right, Allah doesnt like it... I want to end my pain..... I dont like this life, this is not what i wanted..... see if u can help.... thanks

rich

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4 Responses »

  1. Dear brother ... Ter is a solution to every problem... Bt here in your case u hv to recorgnise what u r up against !...you hv to realise tat love is not going to win u the wrld my dear brother.. Matter of fact u r a man who respects a womnes feelings. Maintain yourself nd sustain from the devilish toughts.....my dear brother at frst.... U cannot do anyting if the girl dosent love u in return its ua fault to love her unconditionlly.. Now tat u r in love it is your duty to contorle it like a man ! I also respect the facts tat u bileave in alllah (swt) and often talk to him and do not attempt sucide anymore .. Tis is your frst step brother !... Your second step is that u hv to frst ask the girl if she loves u in return.. If not u hv to let her go coz tis is a mistake done by u to love her without her permission !!. So i hope u hv understood wt i hv said to you !

    And if inshallah it is written in your faith u will become closer to her as time passes bt dont cross your limit my brother fear the lord fr he is watching you! ..... I am here to help as long as you guys are legal from your homes !....

  2. DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR PURPOSE IS WHAT IS YOUR FAITH TEACH AS A SUNNI MUSLIM.WHAT DOES PROPHET MUHAMMAD PBUH SAY???LOOK THERE ARE PLENTY OF FISH IN THE SEA.TIME WILL COME WHEN ALLAH WANTS YOU TO GET MARRIED.ALLAH KNOWS BEST.ALLAH KNOWS WHAT YOU kNOw NOT.The knower of the hidden the knower of hearts...it is maybe there something you were not aware of .My advice is learn Iman build it and understand who Allah is and prophet Muhammad PBUH. Iman is like a diamond...only if people new the value .....This world is only a test and everything is recorded .. Start to go to mosque and be with the people who are in the same boat....If we choose to follow our desires and way of thinking we will never find contentment because of not Obeying the commandments of Allah and teachings of prophet Muhammad PBUH. This is why today people are divorce stressed out and unhappy....So think carefully what you say...Remember it is SHAITAN that plays with the people's head mind heart....but he can never come close to the one who remembers Allah at all times!!! So be happy Allah is always forgiving and there when u call him....

    • Assalaamualaikam

      I have edited your post slightly to remove the first sentence, as this could have been misconstrued and cause distress.

      Midnightmoon
      IslamicAnswers.com editor

  3. Assalam alykum Brother,

    We welcome you to the religion of Islam where there is more to life than the worldly things. We muslims strive to make a better life after death and bear the pain of the difficulties of this world.

    Dear Brother. you are still young and have a long life ahead Inshallah. Don't be disappointed with this heartbreak. Think of how the situation might have been worse for you.

    Imagine if you were married to this girl and spent few years married to her and spent some wonderful memories with her where she looked deep into your eyes and said I love you, not once but so many times in the few years you both have been together. Imagine both of you have a daughter together who you both bring up with love. Then imagine after few years she says that she doesn't love you anymore and wants to divorce you and take the daughter with her and then go marry another man whom she loves. Can you bear the hurt which you will feel at the time ?

    You might think that this situation is not possible but this is exactly what's happening to someone I know, and the pain is too much. I can't imagine how a normal human being can handle this heartbreak. But Alhamdulillah the brothers Iman is high so he is managing but it's very difficult.

    So thank Allah that you didn't have to go through all that and you have the opportunity to start a life with a girl who loves you and not with a girl who marries you out of pressure.

    May Allah give you the strength to face the difficulties of this world.

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