Seeking repentance for my sins
I am a muslim girl who is 15 years old. I masturbate and I recently masturbated in front of a stranger on a webcam. I feel terrible about this I have no idea how it happened. It was like my conscience wasn't in control. I regret it so much and I can't believe I did this. I have made the decision to never do this ever again in my life. I feel so guilty and ashamed of it. I need some advice, or someone to tell me that I won't go to hell because of it because I am terrified I will. I can't tell my family or they will go crazy on me and I don't trust anyone else enough to tell them so I must do it anonymously. Can someone please help me I feel like the guilt, regret and shame that I am feeling is going to eat me up. I am also scared of the consequences that will happen to me in this life and the hereafter. Please help me.
islam321
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Assalamu Alaikum, Hello sister.
Fear not. Allah (swt) is more merciful and forgiving than we can imagine. He created us and built us with purpose. Sexual touch is supposed to feel good. But that's because it is through sex that we create continue Allah's creation. Sex is a beautiful and wonderful act of love. But sex is to be for you to share with your Husband one day. If you are truly sincere and make your apologies to Allah and ask for forgiveness then you will be forgiven. But you must never behave so again. You will be fine. We have all made mistakes in youth. Allah knows what is in your heart and knows how you really feel. It may be helpful to remove yourself from temptation. Get rid of your webcam if you must. You are a beautiful child of Allah, just stay with him and wait for your future Husband.
I hope I have been helpful.
No one can tell you or anyone if they will go to hell or not, if anyone does tell you either if you will or wont they are liars because that knowledge is with Allah only. Repent for your sins and don't do it again, and stay away from this devilish crap known as social media.
Asalam o alaikum
Don't disclose your sins in front of any one. I have heard that disclosing sin is a sin itself. Repent and repent with sincere heart that you are ashamed of what you did and you'' never repeat that again.
Hadith
"One who sincerely repents of his sin is as if he had never committed it. When Allah loves one of His servants, his sins do not harm him. Then he recited the verse: aAssuredly, Allah loves the oft-repentant and those who always seek to purify themselves.'"
Read more about tawbah:
http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/tawbah-in-islam/
ALLAH will forgive you INSHAA ALLAH.
Remember us in your prayers and ask for our forgiveness as well.
ALLAH Bless you...
Assalaamualaikam
We've published lots of posts about masturbation, so it might help to read through our archived posts on this. It's a complicated topic, from a religious point of view, and there are different schools of thought about whether or not it's permissible - reading a bit more might help you decide what you personally think about this, and whether or not you want to stop doing it.
Masturbating for a stranger, though, isn't a complicated issue - it's not a good idea, period. Your age is another concerning issue. At 15, you would be considered below the age of consent for sexual activities in many countries - if this stranger knew about your age, he could be breaking the law and taking advantage of you. Without knowing the details, we can't say for sure whether this was the case, but you might want to think about what happened that led to you being in that situation (eg. were you encouraged by someone who was aware you were young?) and if you think people may have tried to take advantage of you while knowing your age, you might want to speak to a trusted teacher at your school, or a police officer if it is safe to do so where you live - you might not be the only person in this situation and by speaking to someone who can act to address the situation, you might be able to help protect other young people.
If you're sure that this wasn't a case of being put in an unwanted situation, it's still worth thinking about what happened - that way you can make sure you don't repeat your actions. Think about where you were, when it was, who was around, etc. and then think "could that have contributed to what happened?". Once you have an answer to that question, you can look for ways to avoid that thing in the future. For example, if you were alone at home with nothing to do, you could try keeping busy with activities, visiting friends and family, and taking up a hobby, so that you're less likely to be alone and bored.
Remember though, we're all human. Part of being human is making mistakes. Allah, in His Wisdom and Mercy, has shown us the straight path so that we have a guide for this life, and He has promised us His Mercy if we sincerely repent for our transgressions. It might help you to read our articles on Tawbah, as these contain information about repentance and Forgiveness.
Midnightmoon
IslamicAnswers.com editor
Assalamualaikum Islam321,
This is "Sister-In-A-Hood". I am TRULY sorry for clicking submit and writing the first comment, as it was made in error. That comment was directed to another person/post that I read and wanted to respond to. I was quick to press "submit" and realized that it was not directed to you and your post.
Apparently, they do not delete comments on this site, as I tried to contact the site manager to delete my previous post. May Allah forgive me for posting that comment. It was directed to another person on the site.
Furthermore, I agree with some of the other comments. Please sister, Allah is great and HE is ever forgiving and merciful. HE will surely forgive you if you are sincere in your repentance. Inshallah! And also dear sister, you are young and have a whole life ahead of yourself -- Inshallah -- And khair inshallah, you will be happy and will be able to correct your wrongdoings. Do not disclose your sin or sins to anyone. I understand that you reached out for help and being anonymous is great because HE (our Almighty) will shield you from your sin and always give you an opportunity to repent.
Wishing you the best in this life and the hereafter. Ameen.
And once again, please forgive me for my error and quick fingers.
May Allah be with you! Ameen, ya raab!
W'salaam.
Sister in a Hood, I have deleted your previous comment. But please be aware that a few months ago I did a purge of thousands of spam registrations. In the process, the author ID was somehow deleted from several dozen pending posts. When we tried to restore them, we found that the authors were jumbled. The system for some reason assigned the posts to the wrong IDs.
That's why you're seeing what you're seeing. You'll notice they're all recent posts. It's because of the system error.
No one's going to waste their time creating fake posts. What would be the point?
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Thank you brother, Wael. And thank you for the clarification.
I really like this site and refer to it and learn from others mistakes/advises. I was utterly disturbed because I was like how can people create posts and pretend to be people that they are not and seek Islamic advice? Thanks for deleting my previous comment. I appreciate it!
May Allah bless you and this site! Ameen.