Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Should I leave him or stay?

Girl with hidden face, teenage girl

I am 16 years old .. I have committed Zina, my bf forced me as he wanted my assurance.
I can't tell anyone about this. . Now my bf wants me do that just once again .. according to his point of view we both are committed to each other so other things should interfere between us.
If I will say no to him .. he would probably leave me because he would think I am not fully committing my self to him.
I don't want to leave him .. as I can't spend my whole life with a lie that I am pure ..
I regret it everyday. . What should I do now ? Should I leave him or should I stay with him in order to secure my future. . Please help me.


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9 Responses »

  1. If you leave him and repent (regret and promise to never repeat that sin) then it will be as if you are pure again in the sight of Allah. Please leave him, he's not right. He's pressuring you into having sex using his warped thinking, sadly he is just using you. You are worth so much more than this. You don't need to tell anyone about your sin, that is between you and Allah. So don't worry about your future with people. Things will only get worse and more difficult for you if you continue in this relationship. So leave right now and have a fresh start!

  2. Dear sister leave him. He's not in love with u. He's just there to fulfill his devilish desires and once u fell for it he sure will leave u at the end. So now is the time to open ur eyes and see his real face and purpose behind his fake love. U did bad and a haram and forbiden thing but Allah is forgiving. Repent sincerely and never commit sin again. Almighty will surely forgive u as He's merciful. Leave him and never get back to him again. U are so young u will find someone way better then him. Don't worry if u have committed a sin, it's really bad but what's done can't be undone so just repent and seek forgiveness from Allah. Repeating a sin is a major sin in itself. And please at this age stop thinking about such relations and leave ur marriage to ur parents and never indulge in such kinda relationship again please. Hide ur sins and keep them to ur self never tell anyone but repent sincerely and never repeat them again ever. U will be among pures once again. Recite and understand Quran. Indulge ur self in prayers 5times a day. Inshaa Allah u will find peace. And please cutt off any ties with him and break all of the contacts. Please save ur self. Leave him. You deserve better.
    May Allah protects u from evil and bring u peace and hadayah ameen.

  3. Leave him immediately. Don't listen to any sweet words or begging from him. If he had an love or respect for you, he would never have tricked you.

    Do not look back. There is a reason Zina is a MAJOR sin. I swear, it will rip your soul into pieces and you will become a sad broken person. This is true with Muslims AND nonmuslim. I know too many girls who have committed Zina over and over and they end up broken and depressed. Having to carry a heavy past with them forever.

    Give it time, years will pass and as you stay away from major sins, you will feel your heart become pure.

  4. Ok leave him..real man can alwsys marry u right away but player always fins an excuse

  5. At that age it is a very difficult to understand the real thing. Still, you have to understand it now.

    1. Commitment does NOT mean to have sex.
    2. If you have sex with someone , it does not mean that you must marry him
    3. You should marry the man for one condition only - you must like him.

    In your case, tell your boyfriend to wait until you marry him. if the boy loves you he will wait. If he is too hurry then he will arrange the marriage quick. But you should NOT have sex with him again to prove our commitment. You should wait for him and marry him to fulfill your commitment. Sex does not fulfill commitment, it fulfill lust.

    If he waits or arrange marriage - then marry him. If he wants to leave him, let him go. There are many other man in the world who will love you and will not force you for sex. Don't think that your value is reduce for that one time sex. Believe me, if you do not tell it to anybody, your future husband will never know and understand it.

  6. Hi,
    Dear u r stay with ur bf. Or discuss with ur bf how to manage nikah or get fst nikal.
    U leave this guy that should be count in zina...
    So plz don't leave this guy..allah stickly punished zina momines...

    • What kind of advice is that!!!
      Sister please leave this guy. He is just using you and taking advantage of your young age. What has happened is gone. Repent to Allah. And don't think you are impure etc. If you keep thinking like that then most probably later on in life you will regret it.
      If he really wanted committment, he would ask your parents for your hand and gone through proper route. Having sex is not a committment. And also it is not necessary that you marry him since you had sex.
      Repent to Allah, and don't do it again ever, and improve yourself.
      Salam Alaikum

      • my meaning is same dear. but she is ask a question for his bf he is ready for nikah. if he is ready that is good other waize leave.....or MAAR DBA KR LAAT USKE PCHWADE PR ..

  7. Its better to leave the guy , he can be dangerous to you. Be careful about sharing anything personal with him. Keep well away.

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