Should I leave my daughter in the UK and go with my husband to Pakistan?
What can I do? My husband's Visa has ran out and he is my carer and social services refuse me help. I will not have anyone if he goes, my family are busy and too ill to help and I have M.E. a serious condition. I can only walk ten minutes outside home. I've been on help courses and am following their advise but I'm not able to look after myself.
We are suposed to bd geting full custody of my daughter who is 3 years old in January but now she will probably have to stay with her great grandparents who she was only with in first place due to my health from when she was 7 months which has been devastating for me. Everything is going wrong, my husband's Visa has been refused - he can appeal but I'm so worried. He said I can go to Pakistan but I'm scared to travel by train and plane as I can only walk ten mins and I haven't been away from home far for years. I need to have necessary injections and travelling may effect my poor health as I have spells where I collapse and go very weak and almost faint, so being in foreign country is scary for me and I don't speak the language.
My family are so negative and try to stress the worries of going away, but he is my husband and were are supposed to be together. The wife should follow her husbands wishes and I want to but feel guilty as my 3 yr old daughter won't be allowed to come with us and all my family will say I'm being a bad mum for leaving her.
We pray a lot and cry and are worried sick we'll never see each other or be a family again and we've only been married for 7 months. Please give some advise: shall I go or stay? And if my daughter doesn't get into my custody or her dad won't allow her out of the country but husband wants me to go what shall I do? xxx
~Mariam
2 Responses »
Leave a Response
Entries(RSS)
Im not sure but if I were in this situation, I would stay with my daughter. A child needs their parent and your husband is grown he should understand. With praying Duas you guys will reunite as a family. Always remember, Allah is most merciful.
Mariam, Asalaamualaykum,
The ideal scenario would be that your husband stays with you in the UK because of two reasons:
1. That your daughter is here and
2. That you would most probably have access to better medical treatment in the UK for your condition than in Pakistan.
My questions are these:
1) 'Presuming your husband has a ' Two year Spouse Visa', which is running out, why can he not now apply for 'Indefinite Leave to Remain/Settlement'?
2) Or instead if he has a 'Student visa' or 'Work visa' and obtained the necessary 'Certificate of Approval' to marry you in the UK, and now his visa is expiring -why can he not apply for a 'Two Year Spouse Visa'?
3) I guess the simple question is this: 'What is your husband's Immigration Status in the UK?'
4) And if your husband knows your medical condition and that you have a child in the UK, why is he not willing to stay with you in the UK?
Sister, if you could answer these questions, it would give me a better understanding of your situation and I will be able to help you more specfically insha'Allah.
SisterZ
IslamicAnswers.com Editor