Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Should I marry her or not?

Fate and destiny

I had been in relation with several ladies in past. I already had pure intentions towards them but with the passage of time they left me one by one because I never had sex with them. I had sincere feelings with them.

I have in a relation with a girl since 2012. At that time she was student of K-11. She was in love with me while I was already in love with someone else. But the point is, I love this young girl with heart too as I wished to make herself feel safer and protected. So at the time I realized that I may not control my self from having romance with this innocent girl, I slowly get rid of this relations. My intentions were pure. But the effect was negative. She was in a trauma. And as I guessed, she had fallen for another guy soon after me. I think she needed care and feeling of love.

Due to her immaturity and less religious knowledge, the other man convinced her that as they accept each other as wife husband so they can have romance or sex. So he used to caress her whenever he gets chance. That man was a type of Peer. He spell-bounded her and in front of him she never thought to retaliate. As it was her first romantic experience, she thought she has got the real world. But it once her aunt caught her in arms of that man. She tried to tell her about all the commitments they have made, but he stopped her and asked her to wait till time. They had phone sex often and she had been part of it.

During all this she had been in touch of me as I always guided her in career and studies. I assured her about my love for her but I was unaware of background story. Then a time came, I felt depression in her. I tried to figure out but failed. I was unaware that she loves romance with him. Now her conscience provoke truth in her while her heart still runs to him. While on the other hand she had told me each and everything. She had a problem that as I am ready to marry her, still she is confused. She admits that she had been in wrong. But still says that man was not playing, he is sincere. She don't want to lose me ever. She admits my purity... But she says I don't know what to do. That man still asking her to wait. On the other hand she want to get rid of depression. Whenever I talk to her she feel relaxed because I don't judge her.

Now the point is that I want to marry her with 100% acceptance. She also want to but the memories he had given her, and I have not... are still stopping her. I want to bring her out of that dirt. What should I do.


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1 Responses »

  1. Ask her to make Tawbah for the Peer is full of Haram actions and he is spreading his perversion to this innocent girl as well.

    if you can report him to the police, or maybe send some one to his place and tune him up.
    if not, then ask the girl to recite ayatul kursi, and the four quls 3 times everytime she gets depressed and thinks of what the evil Peer has done to her.

    this is the curse of Bidat especially in the sub-continent where people do not try to understand their religion, and bank on some fool to give them what ever false guidance he wills.

    anyhow, get her away from the clutches of this pathetic fool convince her to get close to islam by observing the 5 pillars in earnest. and if you really do wish to marry her, send your parents over ASAP.

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