Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Strict parents and marriage

Assalamualaikum

so basically I need some advice. me and this guy want to get married. He is a good practising Muslim and we have a great understanding. The only problem is his family don't get on with my parents even though his mum is my dad's sister. My parents are typical Pakistani parents and are considering my dad's other sister's son in Pakistan. We had discussed that when I'm told about this proposal from my parents I would reject it but until then I'll keep quiet because supposedly I'm not suppose to know about it. in our house No one talks about such matters openly. But the person I'm considering doesn't want to wait but also doesn't want to send his parents over until I have rejected. Now He keeps saying I've wasted his time.

Im too scared to talk to my parents because we have never talked about these issues openly and that was why I thought I'll wait until my parents talk to me first and then I'll say no.

I'm very stressed out about the whole issue as he doesn't want to wait anymore and is pressuring me to talk to my parents so he knows otherwise he can start looking for someone else . Any advice will be appreciated. JazakaAllah Khair

Zqfwa


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2 Responses »

  1. Too scared.what they goING to give you the beats.Islam teaches us freedom of space n choice.This is your life .. make it right.Act like a mature adult.Be confident.

  2. If the guy is interested in you why don't you tell your mother that they are interested in asking your hand for marriage and then ask the guy to come with a proper proposal.... you have to speak up, though respectfully. Besides, the guy cannot have a high handed attitude wherein he is not willing to send his parents for his sake and expect you to pave the way single-handedly. It has to come from both sides..
    No matter how conservative a household, all parents know these are life long matters.. they might feel uneasy for a while but with consistent effort, they might come around.If they do not, you know that you tried.

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