Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I’m a Sunni and I want to marry a Shia girl

heart and sky, heart and river, heart and buildings

ASSALAM U ALIKUM

I am a 22 years old Sunni Muslim and she is a 20 years old Shia girl and we both are doing bachelors together. I am in love with her and within a year, we created a very strong bond of love within ourselves (nothing physical).

There are many hinderences in our marriage:

1-My family is strictly against love marriage

2-Religious differences are present..........she is Shia and I am Sunni

3-She belongs to highly rich upper class family and i am just a regular middle class guy

I just dont  know what to do, I really love her but I fear that if we don't get married, she will do something bad with her.

I' ll be honest, the marriage chances with her are just 10 percent.

please help me ,

- shahzeb2019


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82 Responses »

  1. Dear Shahzeb:

    I will only focus on the religious difference on my advice.

    Personally I would advice you not to marry this girl unless she becomes a Sunni.

    I agree that there are many things common between the Shias and Sunnis. However, the difference is greater. First of all, they openly proclaim that the Caliphate of Abu Bakr Siddique (May Allah be pleased with Him), Omar Farouque (May Allah be pleased with Him), and Uthman Ibn Affan (May Allah be pleased with Him) are illegal. They also reject any Hadith that has been described by either of them and some even go to the extent that they even curse the first three rightly guided Caliphs of Islam.

    No one among the Sunni scholars ever questioned or doubted the status of the first three rightly guided Caliphs. They were also given the glad tidings of Jannah while they were in this duniya. If I were in your position, I would have never been able to reconcile with the girl unless she first reconciled to give due reverence to the first three caliphs of Islam and eventually became a Sunni before tying the knot.

    I have here focused on one difference only. There are numerous other differences and some them are even more serious. For example, they believe that Ali ((May Allah be pleased with Him) and their subsequent 11 imams are divinely infallible. The sunni belief however is that no human being is divinely infallible except for the prophets and the messengers of Allah.

    Before you see your family as obstacle, I would see religion sectarianism as even bigger obstacle. I have nothing against Shias, for I believe in the policy of "live and let let live". My heart will never be able to able reconcile with Shias however, mainly because of their blasphemous position against the first three rightly guided Caliphs of Islam. This is strictly my personal opinion. The Prophet in one of his hadeeths warned that the only saved sect from his nation will be the Ahlus Sunnah Wal Jamaah. And Allah knows best and He is the best of all judges and He will recompense accordingly.

    • dear if it leagal to marry yahudi nasara,then why not marry with shai,
      they both are eligable to marry themself.May allah bless all

      • Dear brother it does not matter shia and sunni.The thing is matter both are you muslims and have faith in Islam.Islam asks you to follow True Islam not follow sects.Sects came after death of Rasul(Sa) and some people started to gain profit from it.You are totally allow to marry her and there is no barrier hare.Muslim males are allow to marry ahle kitab(Yahudi,christian) so Shia is not a big deal.If you ask some ignorant mufti(both from Shia and Sunni) yes they oppose this kind of marriage and try to prove each other Mushrek or Kafir.But remember Basic Islam is Quran and Rasul (sa) actions and everything should stand above it.Forget about those Muftis whose already reside under some kind of sect with tagged by group.

    • second india is country of superstitious beliefs Haha

  2. Wow u got a lot of obstacles in front of u. Let's see, shia peoples are strict, and once they find out she got something goin on with a sunni guy, she will prob get cursed at and the worse they will do is kick her out and say she's dead of them. We young peoples don't really care that much these days, but its the parents!! Wat can u do. Bein a sunni Muslim, ill say that u should try to give her up. U said she might do something if she can't have u, well tell her to tell her family that she got a boyfriend that she wants to marry. Let's c wat she does then. Who kills themselves for someone else these days. That is the hormones talking. U guys are still young, and will find someone compatible for urselves.

    • Well well I don't understand why do people blame non Muslims destroying their picture when they are destroying it their self
      Mr. Why is there so much misconception regarding shia , both of the sects are muslims tho there are some differences but to be honest many Sunni believe on shia facts too ...
      And if you are talking about that shia are strict then you are fully wrong cuz according to Islam and shia fundamentals daughter is to be loved twice a son and the right of daughter is at most high , then how come a add could throw her daughter . Kindly before suggesting any thing to about any sect so get knowledge about it first .

      • Well you can say that...i am a living example of what he said...i begged my dad for 4 years to get married...and he dicided to disown me..!...i am a shia girl definatly cant go against my dad n marry..so stayed without marraige untill now...n forever!
        N yes should never kill yourself...its haram...how about you give a gift to your most beloved friend ...n somhow in angry he or she...throws it aways to your face...n no fault of you...you would be shatered....ur doing the same to Allah...life is a gift dont do that!...
        Just pray for the best...Allah will lisen to All prayers and never lose hope if its so imp..or u can marry the person ur parents want!

        • did your father agree for u to marry the sunni guy? (coz im going through the same sitaution)

        • Zaina, my case is kinda the same, I love her, but her parents are not letting her marry me(yet), I want to ask you about your current state.

          Did you marry him?

    • Well be truthful and Allah will help you,indeed.and such stupid thinking is developed by Illetrate educated and uneducated people.I would suggest you should stay away from such thinking.Islam is a wide religion but some very very small minded people had made it difficult for us and limited.Be broad minded.

    • Seriously, no they can't do this to their daughter, they can't throw her out like this.

  3. What prevents you from marrying a girl ? You both are musilms and have same beliefs.Good luck

    • They can go ahead and get married now, they r legal age. But they have to worry about their parents. Very easy said than done, go ahead and get married!

  4. U both r welcome to anywhere in India except Lucknow,. Nobody will bother whether u r sunni or shia. Indians like decent & educated Muslim people

  5. Nikah made in heaven, If you love her go marry her,

  6. I'm in the same situation, I love my sunni ex-boyfriend but we broke up because of religion. I want and thought it could work and maybe it can but think about your future. There might be things about both the religions that you guys might not understand, and have you thought about what religion your kids will follow? Just remember, don't convert for love, you must believe first.

    • Shia and sunni are not two diff religions...they are two sects of a single religion..
      And there is no point of converting we all...ALL belive almost the same...just yhe rituals are different...
      There is an ayat in quran...which says do not get astray from the path in differences of the world than the hereafter!!!
      Meaning both shia and sunni teach the same rulling to follow the path of Allah..
      But yes never go against your parents bcoz Allah will never forgive 3 people on the day of judgmnt...1... who does not blive in one god...ALLAH...2....who does not pray....namaz.....3...who hurts his or her mother.and disobays his or her parents....
      Evn if your parents are forcing you to marry which is haram...you can always convence them kindly instead of being rude that now a days kids do...

  7. I can't believe that people are talking about things like converting, they are both muslim!!! What everyone is saying here is haram, do you all not fear Allah. Allah is the judge not us humans. Both Shia and Sunni say the shahada and believe in the oneness of Allah, seriously what is this world coming to when muslims differentiate between each other. It is haram for the families to stand in the way of 2 people's kismet unless they have a valid reason, and the sunni shia one is a ridiculous one. My advice is to do Istikhara and lots of duaa and let Allah guide you as to whether this is the best for you.

    • I agree with Sunni girl.
      Shia's and Sunni's are both muslim. They both believe in one God, the angels, the hereafter, the Koran and the prophets, including prophet Muhammad PBUH.
      In a world where it is hard enough to meet and marry decent muslims, we are making it even harder for each other when we discourage marriage based upon sunni-shia distinction.

    • i totally agree to u.....

    • kalma is different,,,Allah doesnt allow to make additions in kalma or u would be out of islam,,
      either a shia girl or a boy,,must become sunni by heart .thn marry,,,

    • Sister just go in depth and find out what shahada do Shia recite and what do their hadees say..I bet u sister there won't b a single common thing between Sunni and Shia ..not even kalima..

      • Oh Allah please show us All the right path...dear sisters and brothers...
        I am a shia girl...loving a sunni boy n trying real hard to convence my dad for this...n here i go again..
        There is no harm or haram in getting married to a sunni girl or boy or a shia girl or a boy..
        The kalma...la illaha illa laah..mohdin rasoolallah...we shais only add one more point which says ALI UN WALLI ULLAH
        which means...GOD IS ONE...AND ONLY ONE..ALLAH...AND THAT MOHD IS HIS MESSANGER..RASOOL...AND THAT ALI IS THE WALLI...AFTR RASOOL..
        No harm...u can or can not say the last verse makes no diff at All... the most imp is to blv Allah n his massanger...rasool llah...blving in hazrat ali is ur choice u may or may not but he also teaches you the same wht rasool has...hazrat ali had the same teachings of rasool as he was his beloved...that the only reson y we lov him so much...thats all!!!!
        The 10th moharram is a black day for each of us...coz imam hussain was bibi fatima s.a son...has no connection wid any of the khalifa...and evn if we blv ..WE ONLY BLV...ALLAH IS THE JUDGE!!!...instead of all the above why dont we focus on the reson why shahada happended....he died for NAMAZ....n to follow the right path of ALLAH...just do that and you will be absolutly fine...
        Just blv in Allah!!
        May Allah bless us all and help us to come together to fight from the enemies of islam...ameen!

        • what about the namaz???the way to perform namaz is different in both sect... why???
          i'm a sunni having a same problem. tell me why shia do azadari. there are alot of haddis about
          mourning is haram. then why you do that???

  8. well dear here another one is my name is mansoor and i am 24 right now and the girlf whom, i love is 22 and she is a shia!
    we startred a relationship i year ago! now i proposed her for nikaah and we are both muslims and i dnr care abt shia and sunni ..our prophet Nabi s.a.w was Muslim and HAzrat ali r..a was a muslim and reat other shabas were muslim itz we idiots who do this!
    well my dear sisters and brothers! i fighted with every one in my sunni society and begged to mom dad n now they have acpted the gal az their family and now az my love is a shia she is geting scared! and i just have faith in allah and now she is runing away from me and she is gona kiill herself like this!now she is avooiding me for my good sale bt indeed i have given her a stand and i am on the edge i cant leave her! just i knw when you have faith in allah and then you face problemz you get everytg good! plz guys suggest what shd i do! and what shd she do!

  9. @shahzeb bro! allah bless u ur going for sunnat nikaah dnt worry i wd say one thing make sure ur love shd stand for you nt like me she is geting scared and then beg to allah and just wait for the time and make ur parents understand and then u wd get married! inshallah!
    allah bless you with that gal!
    indeed itz mentioned in quran that allah is very happy for the nikaah in which both male and female are willing and happy ..no force at all!
    these communty makers like shia suni wd not let you fight bt trust allah go for nimaz and tell ur love to also do the same!
    my pblm is also same!
    she is now scared of what will hapin n now she is runin away from me bt one thing is that i still trust allah she will come back to me and then i knw i will get married my mom dad are ready az i faced then at ist they were dam rude to me bt then i cried in fornt of them beged to mom and then no my mom dad are ready.. now lets see what wd hapen i trust allah onlu and then she wd realise this soon ..plz [ray she comes back to me and i even knw she is a shia and she is every rich and i m just a middle claas guy!

  10. plzzzzzzzz pray for me i get married to her and allah bless u all

    • Inshallah you will...just pray..
      ALLAH has given both of you the right to choose who u want to spend the rest of your life with...
      May Allah bless you two!

  11. @sana sister and all other plzz sugets what that galfrnd of mine shd do! she is geting scared nd u can read what she is doing i have convinced my mom dad they are ready they love her like me

    • If you consider these points, it will help you.
      I am making it easy for all of you to understand about the marriage between the sunni and shia
      1. Sunni and shia, both are muslims
      The shia person should not have belief in considering points like
      1. Harming oneself during the month of muharram by beating, using knives, etc.
      2. They should not curse the rightful caliphs Abu Bakr, Umar and Uthman(May be peace upon them)
      3. They should not think that Ali was the rightful successor after the prophet, because Allah said that when prophet will leave this world. He wanted the muslim community to rule and elect on the basis of quran and sunnah of the prophet.
      This is reason why the sons of prophet died at an early age. Allah wanted the people to follow sunnah and quran. Otherwise it would be really easy for all mankind if the Prophet's son would have grown up and give advise like prophet muhammad did
      4. Shia's should stop cursing Syedna Aisha for false accusation of Adultery!
      It is haraam! The prophet's wives were not a normal womens, they were the mother of believers.
      5. Follow only Quran and hadith of Prophet Muhammad( May peace be upon him)
      See there's not a big difference between the belief, if that person is not doing anything from the following points, then it is permissible to marry that person
      We are one ummati of prophet
      The only reason we were divided because of the clash between muawiyah and hassan, and clash between yazid and hussain
      6. The Mahdi hasn't arrived yet, Shia's have a belief he was disappeared, its totally wrong.
      Hes hasn't arrived yet. When he will arrive? Allah knows best❤
      I hope this helped you.!
      Jazak Allah khair

  12. brother iam in same kind of situation iam a shia n want to marry a sunni..iam 25 n he z of same age i knw him for almost 12 yrs..its vry hard to convince both d families..iam dyng inside..i knw similarities n differencs btwn both d sects more than him n try to make him undrstnd..he respcts my views so do i..bt dont know how to convince my parents..blieve me nobody z goin to help u in dis jst believe in allah(swt) n urself n peopl wll confuse u more especially who r not in ds knd of situashn.

  13. hi guys same situation i have i love a guy but he have very bad views about shai nd i am also shai i dont know how to make him understand

  14. Well well well, to get the said discursion answered, do not trouble ur self a lot, just think that why Prophet SWAS has said that in my umma there will be 73 firqa all the rest 72 firqa will be going to jahanum {hell} other then one in janah {Heven} so understand any person or any jamath or committee who tell kalmia will not be in heaven. So better do not speak when u don’t know much about this differences, think and you should know what are u speaking coz it’s a matter of islam and might tomorrow you go trapped up just coz of this. And regarding the marriage of suuni and shai I absolutely don’t agree with that, and advice you to follow what your perents tells you to do, you will be happy in life here and after inshallah.

  15. I have been in a realtionship with a man for 11 years. I am shia and he is sunni i love this man so much we want to get married but his parents won't allow it even if I change sinni which I want to they still don't want me becuz I am originally sheea what should I do how can we convince his parents? he loves me and I love him we loved each other for years now (we aren't very religious and his parents aren't not allowing it because of religious reasons its just for political and society reasons)

    • i am in love with shia girl.we have done almost all thing and now she.....

      (Remainder of question deleted by Editor)

      • Brother,

        In short: Do immense tawbah as you have sinned against your own soul. Allah has placed limits on us for a reason. The question you have asked us today is something you needed to consider before you had this relationship. But Allah is most Merciful and has made you stop and think now.

        Please log in and submit your question as a separate post and inshaAllah we will advise you further.

        SisterZ
        IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  16. I don't think you should marry her because she seems impossibly dramatic and unstable. How sheltered is a person to actually believe their life is over because they loose someone? She's being manipulative and egocentric, placing her self worth in the hands of a human. Islam says your worth will only be measured by Allah.

    I would think twice and find a more rational person, religion aside. In most cases people say stronger things than they do. But even if she did, you can't possibly take the blame for her hurting herself, because it would only validate that she was unstable to begin with, and would have most likely found some other reason to hurt herself anyway. Unless of course you desperately want to believe that someone would hurt themselves for you. In which case...you may have to work on your own ego my friend.

    Peace be upon everyone.

    • Why can't a sunni marry an shia if they love each other soo much and my situation is that she is now ignoring me she is a shia.... now what can i do i am broken properly inside and pretending to the world that i am perfectly alright......i saw her daily but she doesn't see me now and i am broken...so what can we do if we love truely....:(

  17. Yes you both can marry as for a Muslim is to believe on main 05 things, ALLAH is only 0ne, Muhammad is last messenger, Angels, Quran and final judgement day.

    Rest are secondary things caliphs and other personalities they are respectable someone must not insult them but these cannot make you a non Muslim.

    I am also going to marry same.

  18. I M SOUNNI...BT MY FIANCE IS SHIA....WE WERE ENGAGED LAST YEAR 2013 ON 12TH MAY...WE HAVE SO MANY PROBLEMS.HIS FAMILY SAID ME DAT U DO SAME THING WHICH I DO...BT MY HEART DID NOT ACCEPT DAT THINGS....I JAXT SAY TO MY FIANCY DAT IF I DIDNOT FORCE U SO Y U FORCE ME...I HAVE TOO MUCH OBSTCLES NW....WHEN ONE FAMILY AGREE OTHER DISAGREE...M TOO MUCH WORRIED...MY BROTHER SAID TO ME IF U LL MARRY WID HIM THEN I LL NEVER MEET WID U N NEVER COME TO UR HOME...I LOVE HM AND HE ALSO LOVE ME...Y PEOPLE 1ST PREFER TO SECTS...WE JXT KNW DAT WE R MUSLIMS SO Y MAKE THESE SECTS....PLZ PRAY FOR ME....

    • Fatima, I cannot read these comments that are written in text speak. I have a hard time deciphering it. Try writing in proper English.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  19. i didn't understand...which difficult in this msg?

  20. today i listen my fiancy that if two persons have a diffrerent sects then marrige is not acceptable in the nature of islam...m in bid problem

  21. i am sounni but my fiance is shia.our engagement did last year 12 may 2013.this time i am in big problem.he's family said to me when i ll b shia then we ll marrige.he loves me alot and i also love him.m mad now wht i do or not..?i said him if i do not force you change your fiqh so why you force me.if you love me then you accept me in every condition..he said sounni is not a sirat mustaqeem.i save you.and cant bear that you do something against of islam.today i listen my fiancy that if two persons male and female have a different sects then marrige is not acceptable in the nature of islam....i just say we are muslims i dont believe on sects...our islam said that every muharram beat ur self.i cant do matam.i cant do m mad now m mad now..ywhy people cheat i wanna kill my self.plz frnds guide me i cant live without him..

    • Sister FATIMA, if you want to get closer to Allah without any problem on your way,,, then stick to the only true path (i.e. the Sunni path), and stay away from that Shia man-- he will lead you to hell-fire, if you follow him.

      • No where in the books in the history is it written that Sunni path is right path, Sunni path is furthur dividing in Baraylwee, Deowbandi, Ahl-Hadees, then more in Shafi, Malki, Hanbali, so how you can say onyl Sunni way is a right way to go.

    • Hi fatima
      Am in same dilemma I am sunni n I love a shia boy am trying to convince my family bt have faced very harsh response from them I love that guy a lot and dnt want to loose him. Bt in deep in my heart I have sum issues with his believes in which the most imp is kalima. They add third testimony in kalima too for which he has given me a lot of reference n also that its hadees how can I deny it . We said "ali wali part" bcz our prophet saww had done so. Dnt knw my heart do nt accept this . It made me think if one could change a kalima how could he be a muslim? Bt what about all ref is it ok to add that part? Can any one plzzzzzz guidd me

      • maheen, such differences in aqeedah (belief) are serious and should be taken into account when considering marriage to a Shiah. I personally would never marry someone who has a different kalimah.

        Wael
        IslamicAnswers.com Editor

        • Bt he mentions me hadees as ref from last kutba of prophet saww I dnt remember exactly bt its like "jis ka ali mola us ka mai mola" he is a zaidi shia most of believe are like us sunnis when I ask him that I dnt add this third part in my kalima so u consider me kafir he said no ; its just our nabi has said this thats why we said it in kalima . Can u plz give me some authentic ref for it ?I mean is it true hadees ? If someone says it in kalima just with the intention that prophet saww had said so is that one is still in folds of islam

  22. but i try dat he will sounni bt 1 thing he didn't listen anything about words...jast say shia is a correct on islam path....

    • Sister FATIMA, forget about this Shia man, and then get healed emotionally. After that ask your brother to help you in finding a pious Sunni man for marriage.

      This Shia guy is ready to lead you to hell, so do not marry him.

      • If he believes that Sunnis are on the wrong path, and that are against Islam, and therefore he needs to save you,,,, then whatever path he thinks is the true Islam, is indeed the real hell.

      • This is just a stupid concept Sunni men and Shia man, in Quran is onyl Muslim men. Shia are Muslim and it is allowed to get marry with them. Do not put yourself in bad position to think Shia and Sunni are different there is no difference.

    • Assalam alaikum Sr. Fatima,

      I have limited knowledge, but I understand this one thing. Neither does it mention Sunni or Shia in the Quran, but again and again it mentions Muslim. There are no sects in Islam. Prophet Muhammad SAWS did not refer to himself anything other than a Muslim and the same goes with the Sahaba (peace be upon them). If we read the Quran first and foremost and use supporting Hadith, we should know the basics of what is required of us. We should stay away from culturally influenced and segregated Islam because Muslims are Muslims.

      This, of course, is my understanding--and the Muslim Ummah was warned that of all the sects that will be made, only one will be correct.

      Al-Quran [23:-52 to 53]
      Allah says:
      "And indeed this, your religion, is one religion, and I am your Lord, so fear Me.
      But the people divided their religion among them into sects - each faction, in what it has, rejoicing."

      My suggestion is to beware, use your own brain rather than depending on his words, build your confidence in your beliefs by educating yourself about the Quran. Inn shaa Allah, it will be clear to you if you seek guidance from Allah swt.

    • Fatima, as much as you love him, it is clear that you guys will be having problems later on if you get married. The sunni-shia thing is going to be a big issue in your marriage. Even if you somehow manage to have a nikkah despite your differences, the issue will arise again when you have children.

  23. Itx not matter YOu Luv hEre Than MArry Her ND Shia Believes in One God Nd last Prophet S.a.w.w Thatz why they are not KAfir

    • Whatever people are saying about Shia are actually misinformation and misconception they even do not know what Sunni is and what Shia are.

      Shia who know the books and history can never say Caliph were wrong or illegal they believe on every body and everyone Hadees and they always believe on everything just a little more they are doing more for the Ahil--eBaiyt and sunni are doing that.

      Go with it and get marry with her this is allowed and legal in Islam.

  24. I am a 20 years old sunni boy n i loves to 22 years old shia girl n she iz also love me but some some sects probs will be come in our marrige so what should i do i really love her n more n more so plz give right path according to islam n our family never never will be accept of both so plz plz gimme good n ryt suggstion

  25. Asalamualaikum :3 Sadly, we all have the same problem here.. I'm in love with a Shia girl and she means alot to me.. She also loves me back but I can't be in a relationship with her, due to some of her promises and problems.. So the final thing that could happen is marriage. I'm a very loyal person and I try to maintain my Taqwa by not doing anything haram. I never was and never will be involved in anything that may cause me to sin in the worst way.. I truly love her from my heart but our families and this cruel world stops us from being together. We both respect each other in the best way we can and would like to keep everything Halal. We both fit perfectly together except this Sunni and Shia part. This has caused many problems between us and this even keeps us away from being with each other. I am a Man and to be honest, I have cried over this issue. I feel like, if we can't be together, I'll never learn to love again. She does want to be with me forever but this Sunni and Shia issue has made me feel bad about my culture and traditions. I really love her and want to embrace her through marriage. I need serious advice on this and would be glad if anyone helps. JazakAllah :3

    • If it's at all possible for you to marry her then do so. If it's not possible then end your relationship and stop contact with her completely. These are the only options for a Muslim.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  26. Bro i have same issue can u plz help me...
    We love each other from last 9 years...
    Plz plz help me....
    M didn't want to lose her...
    I am sunni.. & she is sayeed shia...

  27. damnnnnnnn. how can you force somebody to convert her or his faith. let her or him to live in his or her faith. i am just fed up to watching all those stuff. if you love somebody just go for it. why you guys are thinking to change somebody religion. its not to make her or him or fore her or him to convert in the same faith you belongs to. thats fine if your lover convert her self or him self for you to inspire with you that will be great and he or she will willing to live with you in same faith that you belongs to for whole life.

  28. I am a Shia girl and in love with a Sunni boy,neither of our family is agreed for our marriage in future,although we are too young for performing nikah and have many years to become alllegible for marriage but still I need an advise that can a Shia girl and Sunni boy marry,I don't know exactly what Sunni sect he belongs to but I've seen his father wearing green turban and thay also go to naat khuani,so please tell me that which sect he belongs to.Moreover,his parents have said that thay will accept me as their daughter in law only if I convert.I asked him that can't we get married the way we are but he says that he have searched that can we get married as Sunni and Shia but in this way the marriage will be invalid.considering this situation we both are depressed but neither of us is ready to leave each other at any cost.We both love each other a lot but due to this difference we are extremely depressed so I'm really in need of your advise that what step should we take which would not be against Islamic belief.please give me the advise as soon as possible.

    • Please read the answers already given on this post and other similar posts. Also, we do not really have sects in Sunni Islam but if you want to know which madhhab he follows (though I don't see why it matters) doesn't it make more sense to simply ask him, rather than have us try to guess based on his clothing? Furthermore it sounds like you are setting yourself up for a problem by being so close to this boy. You say you are still young and have several years before you can marry. So why are you so close to him now? In Islam we do not have close relationships of this kind before marriage. It would be better for you to focus on other parts of your life (deen, studies, personal development) and stop worrying about this boy for now.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

      • Actually there are some problems due to which I am unable to ask him directly about his belief.but I needed an advise from a knowledgeable person so i opted to ask you.im not a person who is really close to religion.Its just that im really close to him,due to this matter both of us are unable to focus on our studies but this is not the correct time for us to marry,I tried my level best not to think on this matter but I can't help my self.At this point I can't decide how to deal with this situation,i do not know what to say to his parents that wether ill convert or not.i just want to solve this matter as soon as possible so that I can then concentrate on my studies.So can you please tell me that what should i say to them,Neither of us want to leave each other but we cannot take any step because of age and if we took any step we'll not be financially fit to afford our expenses as neither of us is capable of earning because we are still studying. I do not know why we are so close to each other but when ever we tried to forget each other we simply cannot.so please suggest me that should I convert or not.

      • Please reply my comment sir

  29. Give me such an advise in which I would not have to leave him.

  30. Assalaamualaikum Brothers and Sisters.
    I just want to know how should we convince a shia muslim to follow the right path, leaving all the forbidden things like Not to harm oneself during the mourning of muharram, accepting the first three caliphs as the right ruling ones. Can anyone give me reference from quran or hadith, so i may convince some people.
    Jazak Allah khair

  31. YaAllah!make us one.Ameen.SummaAmeen.

  32. Assalamualikum I'm shia but I don't follow the rules of shia my father is shia and my mother is sunni so from childhood I follow sunni rules so I wanted to marry with a sunni guy and he also wants to marry me but his parents r not allowing to marry us so please what to do help me plzz...

    • Plzz reply me sir suggest me what to do....

    • Walaikumasalaam! Sister Zeba Fatima, regarding your matter, there should be no difficulty, first of all i want to say you there are no sects in Islam, people got divided due to political reasons. And whatever happened in the past time, there are only several authentic hadiths which can be taken into account to clarify the false accusation.
      Allah says in the quran, that both male and female have the right to choose their spouses, try to make them understand in a better way, Do istikhara and see the result, seek forgiveness from allah, pray to allah that he make the difficult time easy for both of you.
      May Allah give hidayath to you and your parents and to him and his parents, ameen

  33. Walikumaasalam brother.
    I just wanna say that brother first become a successful man. Be a son that ur parents are proud of and give them all the happiness and keep them forever happy and m sure they will agree with ur decision ad they will surely support you if the girl is right for you and if you are the right guy then I don't think that the girl parents are going to have Any problem.
    Now a days what parents sees in her daughters husband is, can he keep her happy forever, can he fulfill her needs, is he close to Allah.
    Tell ur girl to talk to her parents about you n just ask them just to meet your family once.
    And if it didn't work don't be sad, allah knows the best. Good men are for good women and Vica versa. If she is for you Allah will put her in your life and if she is not Allah will give you someone who you deserve may b someone who will love you more then her.
    Insha Allah you both will be together.
    Keep asking Allah for her.

  34. I am also a sunni boy and I wanted to marry a shia girl because I love her so much but problem is that she belongs to another sect and my parents won't accept her at any cost. Plz help me

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