Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Too late for abortion, what to do?

Pregnant teenassalamualaikum,

my girlfriend is pregnant and now it is too late for abortion now i cant kill my baby.

The big problem is that she is a hindu girl.

Now what should i do suggest me??

-mohd

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47 Responses »

  1. I suggest that you ask her to become Muslim, and marry her. Considering the difficulty of her position, perhaps she will accept.

    If she refuses to become Muslim, you cannot marry her, but you still need to inform your family and take responsibility for assisting her financially.

    I realize that's very difficult. But you made poor choices, and now the bitter fruit has arrived. If you are man enough to make a baby, then you must be man enough to take responsibility.

    Wael
    IslamicAnswers.com Editor

    • Sateesh ,

      As per Islam a marriage between Muslim and non Muslim (in this case idol worshiper) is not valid .As this is an Islamic website so answers are based on Islamic rules .

      Muslims believes this life is a test and believe in one Allah and prophet(SAS) and his teachings .
      Idol worship is contradictory to islamic belief and as per islam idol worshipper will face harsh punishment after death .

      Mainly the person who knows idol worship is wrong but still does it for the sake of family,society,worldly gains and don't care about Allah he will find his place in Hell after death .

      Life is test .I invite you to study islam from some good sources like IRF .(Islamic research foundation,India)
      http://www.irf.net/

      • Brother ,

        Islam doesn't propagates hatred or violence .
        It doesn't allow forcible conversion .
        It only talks about passing message of Islam and other person accepts or no is not of his responsibilities .He can't force any one to accept it .
        In above case brother can't force her to accept Islam but can only pass the message . A message of truth .

        I agree there are some good points in other religions too but what if you get every thing in one package and without any flaws ? Obviously you will go with a this package .Islam is that package .

        Muslim believe the Quran as final word of God and they believe Bible,Torah were also word of God during that period but now they have been modified by human beings like priests and Quran is the final world of God and Allah has taken responsibility of the book so that no one can corrupt it .

        I know I being Muslim telling you that Islam as a whole package is better of others will not impress you so why don't you do some ground work .

        Can you please do some study about Islam ? from authentic sources like IRF etc .

        Can you do comparative religious study and find out the flaws in other religion ??

        Can you find out the concept of God in various religions and analyze it and will see the best definition in Islam .

        Can you see the accountability of every actions and life after death rewards/punishment in various religion and find out which is more convincing ?

        Or at least this video will convince you ?

        Is the Qur'an God's Word? by Dr Zakir Naik | Full Lecture

        If some body is convinced this is the truth .If some body's mind believes that Islam is the right religion and then if he abandon it for world ,women,wealth or power position then Allah will put him in hell fire forever .

        There might be people who are ignorant .Allah will decide everything based on your knowledge ,understanding ,situation ,context and other factors .

        Brother Sateesh, I invite you to read about Islam and analyze it deeper .If you are convinced about this religion then open your heart and come to Islam .

        • MasAllah well said.

        • dear brother Illogic,
          this is called "situation management" women in question left with no other option but to merry him because she is pregnant, so that she must accept other religion which do not need to enter. but for sake of her baby.

          great laws brother.
          thats why i hate religion (including mine ) and love secularism. be human in women question case. because your views are not only effecting only on religion this is effecting both religion especially women life. do not let her fecture into dark, please

          • She made choices, as did he. No one forced her to have sexual relations with him. Also, she knew he was a Muslim. She does not have to marry him. She can raise her child on her own. Many women do it. It is difficult, but it is a result of her own choices. But if she wants to marry him, she must be Muslim. You can argue about it all day, but the rule is firm in Islam and you will not change it with your debates, no matter what you say. So please do not waste everyone's time.

            Wael
            IslamicAnswers.com Editor

          • Dear Wael

            Our muslim brother here made first mistake i.e. by making girl friend for enjoyment then he made second mistake for starting sex with her and did not care about any ethical values. He has already gone too far for us to turn him back.

            Now he wants us to find him a way to get out of this situation. If he wanted to have a muslim family, he should not have started the illegal relationship in the first place.

            Now come to the possible solutions based on Islam and also on human rights of both girl and boy.

            1. The guy here faces adultery punishment as ordered by Islam and gets free of the bond. This is only possible in a muslim country with Islamic laws..

            2. The guy asks girl for forgiveness and let the girl decide whether

            (i) She take cares of her own child and forgives the boy thus releasing him of the responsibility.

            (ii)He pays for the child expenses from his medical care to life-time education(which is
            not possible because the guy will have to seek permission from his parents or his future wife).
            His muslim wife no matter how much caring will not allow even a penny to be given to some
            outsider. So i am afraid that this option is unrealistic.

            (iii) The guy has to abandon his wish for having an Islamic family and settles for a secular family
            (It is highly unaccepted-able by our muslim community) but that is entirely the result of his
            choices and his ethical obligation because only father is ethical responsible to earn
            for his child rather than the woman involved.

            If he abandons the girl without any forgiveness then at the judgement day, the Hindu girl will be compensated by his good deeds.

            Narrated Abu Huraira:

            Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said, "Whoever has oppressed another person concerning his reputation or anything else, he should beg him to forgive him before the Day of Resurrection when there will be no money (to compensate for wrong deeds), but if he has good deeds, those good deeds will be taken from him according to his oppression which he has done, and if he has no good deeds, the sins of the oppressed person will be loaded on him."

            Reference : Sahih al-Bukhari 2449
            In-book reference : Book 46, Hadith 10
            USC-MSA web (English) reference : Vol. 3, Book 43, Hadith 629

            If it were a muslim woman pregnant because of a Non muslim man, then the woman had no ethical obligation to marry that Non muslim man because she can easily find a muslim father for her child.

            I am afraid in this situation, the final decision rests in the hand of the Hindu girl.

          • Great analysis feelix, acceptable solutions. thank you for your genuine view beyond religion. for your work ,god must appreciate you and your family with a lot's of good thing in the future. sure i deserves to be happiest person. yes. thank you.

          • Dear Sateesh

            I have only summed up the analysis of opinion of others. Let us wait for other guys to make the final advise.

            The discussion is not over yet, so be patient.

  2. Assalaamualaikam

    What you do now is prepare to be a father. Ask your girlfriend to become Muslim, and if she accepts Islam then you can marry her and raise your baby together as a family. If she declines, then you still have a duty to provide for and support your child, and you can apply for access or negotiate custody arrangements, so that you can take an active part in your child's life and inshaAllah provide him or her with some exposure to Islam.

    You also need to make sincere tawbah for your transgressions, and take steps to ensure you don't repeat these actions in the future. Remember that, as a father, your child will be looking to you for an example of how to live his or her life - make sure that you're setting a good example.

    Midnightmoon
    IslamicAnswers.com editor

    • Dear Sateesh

      How would you feel if you made a friend and brings him under your shelter then he abandons you alone and ends his friendship with you.

      In the same way leaving the door of Islam will certainly make Allah angry.

      • Feelxi, true.

        but what about god's of women in question, wont they get angry? even i am not asking him to leave great Allah, i am asking him to respect her religions views and let her be in her own religion. and request both of them to come out and get merry and lead happy life. then both party's (gods) feels happy. do not say him to force her to convert to Islam in the sake of marriage. be secular, respect all religion values, respect women in question position.

        • "but what about god's of women in question, wont they get angry?"

          These "gods" do not exist. They are man-made images who exist only in people's imagination. They have no power to help or harm anyone. Human beings were created by one single Creator, that is God, the First and Last, the Almighty. He has no partners, no children, and no lesser gods. All other worshiped things are false. That is the Islamic viewpoint.

          Wael
          IslamicAnswers.com Editor

          • Dear Wael,
            half knowledge answer are danger to human health and women in question's feature, i can show you thousands of links here which supports women in questions religion, even you life time is not enough to understand the values of these religion. but i dont because i am not religious and i fight for women in questions dignity. at least now start learning how to respect others, and other religions value. you know that i still respect Islam even i am a Hindu, i do go to masjid, and i pray there what ever why they follow. but for following great god Allah, no need to leave Hinduism and become Muslim. come to Hyderabad, and know how many Hindu people are going to masjid to respect our brothers & sisters (Muslim) values. just think that you are not only commenting here, you are also giving suggestions here. which affect friendliness between people. please do misunderstand my comments. if there is no god, that means there is no god at all but does not mean only Allah is a god. hope you can give secular suggestions when problems involve two other religions peoples.

          • Sateesh, you say ' even your lifetime is not enough to understand the values of this religion' about the religion you were born to, even though you claim to be irreligious and secular. Please understand this is how Muslims feel about Islam. Also I'd like to ask, how are you so sure coming out of their religion and marrying will solve the problems of this couple? which set of values should they follow and bring their child up in, for the rest of their lives, in your opinion? You say secularism will provide a solution for them to marry, but what about the rest of their lives? Do you think they will be happy following two such contradicting sets of values , for the rest of their lives, practically speaking?

          • FAO sateesh

            Assalaamualaikam

            This is an Islamic advice website. This is not a forum for debating theology. While we welcome contributors from all cultures and faiths, it is important that we keep things relevant to the matters at hand. Please make sure that your comments are relevant to the published question, and bear in mind that as this is an Islamic website, advice given should be consistent with Islamic values.

            If you have specific concerns or questions regarding some of the issues you've mentioned (women's rights in Islam, living in multi-faith societies, etc.), you are very welcome to submit your own question for publication and we can inshaAllah discuss the issues there. But continuing to attempt to discuss them here is detracting away from the questions asked by the original poster.

            Midnightmoon
            IslamicAnswers.com editor

          • Dear Sateesh

            I request you to copy the link of this discussion and inform your community of the dangerous consequences of a Hindu girl appearing to have a sexual relation-ship with a Muslim person.

            Good Luck and take Care

          • Dear brother feelix,

            i don't know any forum which support women, can you past some useful links here which fight for women's dignity, if you do so you will be more helpful person to me brother. people like your oxygen to women's dignity. thank you brother keep this way thinking. good bless you. surely.

          • Dear Sateesh

            I believe that if we just inform people in our neighborhood of the consequences of an interfaith relation-ship involving muslim guy than it will be enough.

            If someone wants an islamic family and forming a relation with non-muslim person for enjoyment then he or she is obviously committing a crime of cheating that non-muslim person.

          • sure bro,

            there is no problem with people who loves their religion, but problem with others who hates other religions and dont respect other religion's values, and there is a denger with thouse people who exploite religion values to limit women. i hope one day is on the way, on that day everybody realise the power of women, then only they come to know value of women(god).

          • Dear Sateesh

            You should learn one thing that is repeated in above posts in response to your comments that

            At the least muslim in this forum do not hate other religion , their beliefs or values nor against the woman's rights.We only wish every member of our community to have an Islamic family not a secular one.

          • brother feelix, again you got it wrong, i said there is no problem with good people of any religion, if every body is like as you said (follow's religion good values) there would be no need of this forum, because every body must be good, so some are not following. (i think you could understand). my problem is with people who are exploiting these rules. OK. there are some people (not about you) they don't follow religion in so many cases, (love, sex, etc.....) but when it comes to marriage and women they strictly follow religion, even though religion's rules and people are supporting them based on religion's values (not considering social values), this thread is best example. and you mentioned that you people do not consider secular one to have in your community, just think brother what would happen,if every religion people think like that. please mingle with people brother not with.........just think of husbands who are beating their wife's for even small mistakes, and still she can not be open because she should follow rules of all religions (Hindu,religion). please do not take me as i am oppose to your religion. please brother, now we have to bring change at least in our family's, if not today then when. think about women freedom. please

          • Dear Sateesh

            Marriage is a contract for living longtime together. It needs husband, wife and children to be in synchronization. Islam does not deal only with private faith but cover aspects how the family should be run.

            If husband and wife are of the same faith, then this synchronization is very much easy but if they are of non-reconcile-able faiths then the balance of family has to be run with a very delicate balance.

            That is why we stress at the least in our own religious community(Islamic one in this case) not to think of starting a family with other religious faith(male or female) because then the family may not properly run in the end.

            The spiritual balance in interfaith marriage can not be maintained by everyone. Of course there might be exceptions but we prefer not to follow this dangerous path.

          • bad perception about marriage, in fact harmful.

          • It is okay for us if our perception is not like-able by people from other cultures .

            But do not let anyone of your community get cheated by someone of our own. We will not allow it either.

          • thanks, feelix. i ll try hard form my side, and if you find any one of us already cheated (forced) in your community, please let (send) them get back to their own community, even though they say to stay (because there might be some internal pressure )i hope you would..,but i doubt others how would they receive it , because they love them to be in their community. just for sake ok......

            sorry dear. but please understand my view, to respect every one's values, please

          • Dear Sateesh

            Here is the right way

            Neither our nor your side should not interfere an interfaith couple but instead advice them once to either get serious for a secular family or get separated in the early phase before the start of pre-marriage sexual relation(definitely lead to disaster) and then leave them alone.

          • feelix true and acceptable,

            applicable to both you and me (not feelix and sateesh but to muslim and hindu) let them lead their beloved life, why community people involve in that. i can not understand.

  3. Salam dear brother,
    You say your girlfriend is a Hindu and she's having your baby, oh dear that's a very difficult situation for you and probably her too.
    Well Firstly, I'm shocked that that you didn't take care of your religious values, Islam teaches one not to have affair and keep oneself clean. Secondly, you went and got your lover woman up the duff!
    She's not into religion because she's from a different religion. Well you need to convert her now brother, if she loves you she will look into Islam and read upon it and from there insha Allah will convert. Our religion is the final religion which God sent to earth. If you and her read together into Islam you will find it very peaceful and maybe come across it in depth, so then you will both have a better understanding. I know it's going to be a hard trying to sort yourself, your girlfriend and the poor baby who is innocent in all this, but everything you do from now on needs to be done through our religion teachings.
    I think aborting the baby is out of the questions, baby like I said is innocent, you need to focus on letting your girlfriend know that religion is important and you need to sit down and have a chat about next steps. If she is willing to look into Islam then Marsha Allah she will see that Islam is a pure,peaceful religion and has she studies it it will make sense to her.
    Only once she is willing to accept Islam you can guide her and marry her, but I think marriage isn't possible until the foetus is born, you both need to ask God to forgive you by praying daily, and never do zina again.
    Allah swt is very forgiving as long as you repent and don't do the same thing again.
    Having sex is not right if one is not married, remember that next time.
    I pray that all is okay with you, your girlfriend and baby.
    Now let's talk about the negative side, if your girlfriend doesn't want to look into Islam then I think you should be there for the baby and the baby only, give your baby a chance to know their father.
    I know your girlfriend might make it hard for you to see the baby if she doesn't want the baby into Islam, but I guess you have aright to know your child and should try and do everything possible to see your child,after all it is a part of you too.
    I also suggest that while you do everything for your child financially and with pure love form a strong bond if your girlfriend let's you, that will be enough. You also need to pray and ask Allah swt for forgiveness as this was a bigger sin, (sex before marriage).
    Also in the future let this be a lesson learnt and when you finally start again please do it the right Islamic way, marriage before intimacy.
    You can talk to girls see if you and her connect and have things in common,then once you know it's the right one ask her hand in marriage. We all in life are not perfect some of us learn the hard way, and I believe that which ever way we learn Allah swt is very merciful and will forgive as long as we ask for forgiveness and stop our wrong doings.
    Please in future look deeper into our religion and read upon it in more depth, if you had done that today you wouldn't be in this sad situation, I tell my kids regularly that life is not a joke think of all the possibilities what can occur then do what you think is right and what's right through Islam. Jews teach their kids same that think before you do anything weigh out the options that's why they are successful, btw I'm not a Jew I just watch Jews because of they are successful in life, in whatever Jews do they think because they don't want to sink!
    Best of luck for the future and remember Allah is very merciful just follow the path of Islam and repent, God will help you always, if in this life things are hard you have to make sacrifices then be it, next life is more important , as it's forever, and try your best for your innocent child to let her father be in her life if it's possible, if it's taken away from your hands and you are put in an awkward situation, then at least you know you tried.
    Good luck and turn to Allah swt for help and be patient. Best of luck dear little brother.

    • its Masha Allah not Marsha Allah there is no word like Marsh please stop making fun. first i thought you did by mistake and i told you to correct but its the third time i have seen this.
      please let me know what is your problem, where ever you answer
      why do you use Marsh Allah? i want you to clear this thing.

      thanks

      • Lorelei, her device probably changes "Mash" to "Marsh" due to the auto-correct feature, and sister Raheela hasn't noticed it. It may not recognize Masha'Allah.

  4. Dear brother Sateeh
    I just read your statement and I can't understand you, I do not believe a word in what you say bad about Islam,
    Our religion is very peaceful ,read into it before you making accusations, you will realise how pure respectful and peaceful it is. Let me make one thing clear please as i am very upset in what you have said, We women so have a right and to Allah swt we are all equal in Islam. I don't like people criticising our religion, read into it before you make false accusations.
    I am very happy with this Islamic website and my religion and I don't understand why people who have no clue of Islam start making untrue remarks!
    I have never made bad comments about any religions and I am deeply hurt in you making bad remarks about us women, in our religion we are happy. I shouldn't be justifying owt to you but I'm very upset, hurt and possibly angry in what you say about us women of Islam. It's not right in you making untrue statements like you have done, what is wrong with you people trying to bring us women down? I'm proud of my religion as it teaches us not to lash out at others, I have found you have lashed out at us women for no reason at all. Has a women of Islam I ask you kindly please stop this untrue nonsense and before you go around hurting and throwing false statements to us females think, read and understand Islam, don't go around hurting us women. I would never do that to any one hurting or criticising others whether they at pre women or men.
    There are plenty of Indians I know which think we Muslims are enemies only a few minority of Indians are okay which I class are good , in my personal life I've tried hard to be friends with all religious people. Most people I've seen go around making false accusations like you have, bringing us Muslim women down.
    I don't respect what you are trying to do, why are you picking on us?
    What gives you the right to criticise us women ,women of Islam?

    • sister Raheela,

      Well said . There are many good Indian non Muslims who don't think Muslims as enemies .People from RSS background or belonging to right wing groups have this problem but not all .

      Not sure you stay in india and know the correct context ?

    • Dear Sister Raheela

      Normally muslims and idol worshipers around the world live separately and stick to their own religious society during marriage.

      India is a very special case, where interactions between Muslims and Hindus were started with military wars(Attacks from Afghan Muslims on Indian Hindus) followed by muslims ruling over Hindus.

      Then muslim Sufi entered the region and made Hindus their friends by just living peacefully with them and an exchange of metaphysical ideas took place, which lead to formation of a new religion known as Sikh. Thus there are Hindus and Sikh who dearly respect and value Muslim
      sufis like no other non-muslim(including even Christians and Jews ) on this earth does.

      Muslim sufis were successful in building a social bridge between Hindus and Muslims of subcontinent.

      So it is acceptable in subcontinental society especially in india for a muslim marries a sikh or Hindu and both stick(no interference) to their own religious faith. Their children follows whichever religion they prefer on growing up. So it is very usual for such a family to live in a house, where one room is reserved for muslim prayers and a separate room exists for Hindu idol worship.

      For muslims living elsewhere, this is clearly unacceptable but it is considered normal in subcontinent.

      • Feelix: For muslims living elsewhere, this is clearly unacceptable but it is considered normal in subcontinent.

        Yesterday I saw some videos on youtube about Hindus and Muslims of India. There is lot of information on youtube. I saw one video where a Muslim is the sole caretaker of a temple. I saw another video where a mosque is being renovated in a town. Sixty percent of cost of renovation has been contributed by Hindus and Sikhs. Muslims, Hindus and Sikhs all are volunteering labor needed to complete the project.

        My question to OP is what promises you made to get that girl in bed

      • Brother ,
        What you are mentioning are some exceptional scenarios .Most of Muslim families in India too don't accept marriages with non muslims and staying with idol worshipers at same house .
        You are talking about some exceptions and not norm .

      • JazakAllah khairan for clearing this thought that I've had couldn't get an answer for it.
        I never knew how the Sikh religion came into existence.

    • Dear Sister Raheela, its might be in your case, and i am very happy about your happiness as brother or any other human on the earth.
      but it does not work as you said in case of forced conversion (by making situation as critical as they are left with no chance then conversation to get merry loved once (even though Islam doest not like this practice)). please come to reality. please please please. please support all. support women in question. not only our religious boy.

      i am very sorry sister, if i hurt your feelings.
      your brother,
      sateesh.

      • sateesh, I deleted most of your comments. I welcome comments supporting women, encouraging rights for women, etc. But this is an Islamic forum. We believe that Islam is the true religion. I will not allow posts encouraging people to convert to Hinduism, or saying that Islamic rules are backward, that people should leave the Quran in the past, etc. You are wasting your time here with such comments. We are not going to change God's laws or alter our religion because you do not like it!

        Secondly, no one is "forcing" this young woman to convert. India is a free country, is it not? He is free to ask her to convert, and she is free to accept or refuse. According to the rules of Islam, he can only marry her if she converts. True, he should have thought of this before he got involved with her. He made serious mistakes.

        Furthermore, if he does not marry her but provides financial support for the child, that does not make her a prostitute, as you suggested. I am not telling him to continue having relations with her. Rather, if they cannot be married, he should cut off his relationship with her; however, he still has a financial duty to support the child.

        Muslims are a persecuted minority in India. If you want to preach to someone about secular values and respecting all cultures, then preach to the right-wing Hindu politicians who are running your country and encouraging (or at least overlooking) daily violence against Muslims. Don't come here with your privileged views, looking down on minorities and trying to force majority cultural values.

        Wael
        IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  5. Sateesh,

    I've read your comments above, and I'd like to discuss your view point, I would not go into a discussion about how and why, one religion is better than the other. In my own small way, I've made a study of different religions, and I do find a certain beauty in each one. I agree with you when you say each religion has its own set of values, but every religion propogates good and condemns evil, which is the basis of human morality. Coming to this case, I'm sure you will agree with me when I say both Islam and Hinduism preach chastity in their men and women, and extra marital relations are strictly condemned in both religions as an evil.Indulging in such relations, whether it be two Muslims, two Hindus or a Muslim and a Hindu is wrong, and equally wrong in all three scenarios.

    AS to your view that asking the Hindu girl to convert to Islam so she can marry this Muslim boy is wrong and an oppression of Hinduism and women both, I'd like to say that if the Hindu girl had shared her problem on a site which offered solutions based on Hinduism, or asked a Hindu priest, they would have probably told her to ask the boy to convert to Hinduism so they could get married.

    I'd like to discuss what would happen if one of them converted to the other religion, for necessity's sake without really believing in the other religion. Lets say this lady converts to Islam just for the sake of getting married, and these two people get married and have their baby. Lets have a look at their daily life. How would the girl feel, every time she was asked to prepare meat for her husband? Would she be comfortable going against a practice she has been taught is sacred, since childhood? And would she be comfortable being told that the deities she has been taught to revere since childhood are non existent in Islam? Similarly if the young man converts to Hinduism JUST FOR THE SAKE OF GETTING MARRIED, would he be comfortable praying to multiple deities, instead of the one and only Allah he has always been taught to pray to. No. Such a situation would make their daily living very, very uncomfortable indeed. And what if both of them come outside their religion and marry? What religion would their child follow?Would he/she celebrate Eid ul Fitr and Eid ul Azha or celebrate Diwali and Holi? Would he/she revere cows as sacred animals or sacrifice them on Eid ul Azha? Would he/she worship the Trimurti in a temple or bend their self in sajda, praying to the one Allah? They cannot do both as the very basis of Islam and Hinduism contradict each other. Not to mention, the couple would be living in perpetual sin, as such a marriage is not valid in both Islam and Hinduism.

    My point is , Islam does not condemn such marriages for the sake of oppressing women, nor does it condemn love. All it teaches is that the love between a man and a woman should be regulated in that oldest and most dignified of institutions...marriage. And that marriage should be between two people whose beliefs are the same, whose way of living and morality are the same, as religion is nothing but a Divine dictation of how to live your life..for practical purposes, so they can help each other grow and thrive in their faith and belief, and have progeny which they can bring up with mutual understanding and upbringing.

    I hope I've made my point clear without offending anyone here. If so, my apologies as no offense was intended.

  6. 'now i cant kill my baby'

    That has to be thee single most disturbing sentence, i have ever heard coming from the mouth of a supposed 'Muslim'

    I'm glad other brothers and sisters on this site have been able to find the patience to advise further.

    May Allah forgive you brother

  7. If you both can do haraam before marriage then this is the consequences of doing such haraam. I can see now it bothers you she is hindu BUT you didnt think of your parents or religion before you both had sex. It took an abortion to consider your options shame about that. My strong advise is keep the baby its a blessing and tell your parents and face up to your actions. I doesn't mention in your post you love this person etc if you do you can marry her. May Allah guide you.

  8. @sateesh i did nt read your first comment i dont know whats going on here but i hv got a lil idea.
    first of all i will not point finger on your religion and i expect from you the same. so please be patient while making comments so that you can convey your message easily and positively.

    the problem is neither of us parties are accepting that the mistake is mutual.

    no religion support illegal relations before marriage it is despicable in every society whether Hindu, Muslim, Christian or Jewish. both of them have brought shame to the family, i wonder who will marry this girl now he has destroyed her life . who will give her daughter no body wants a son in law like that.

    both of you must go to your parents tell your mistake ask for forgiveness first! now you both want to abort the baby secretly that means killing a life. dont you kill the baby you must now take the responsibility you are a coward loser, you are not afraid of committing sin but you only care about people what they will think ?

    you dont care if Allah is angry , you care about people your own respect, your impression. shame on you for destroying the life of a woman, for committing a sin and now you will force her to accept islam and she will lead the life of a hypocrite helpless woman! poor parents. shame on you

    • @ lorelie lei.

      dear friend, i feel great full of your support to women in question condemning that men's act , and real thing which made me happy is your view of not relating this issue to religion, and your suggestions (views) are thought full and out of religious scope. now i feel like i met one human (real human). keep going brother, save women dignity, at any cost, finally we will achieve that true, we can achieve, but thing here is how hard we have to give our support to female. whether you bealive or not i am assuming my sister in her position. and you raised one point that she may not get anther one in to her life because of this issue in her life, because it's open to all as she carrying before marriage, but it is not in the case of men, as he can hide this issue and get support from his family (even in hindu). just let all religious people (including Hindu) that if there is a god he must be born from a mother (women) womb.

      thank you.

      • to support a woman, you need to guide them properly. women should learn to stay away from the trap of such men, they need to understand that a real man will give her his name, he will make her the dignity of his family, will never use her like this.
        on the other hand i think parents should take their responsibility in training their sons about these type of issues. its parents fault who think he is a boy let him do whatever he wants.
        both of them have made the mistake they should tell their parents, ask forgiveness. abortion is not the way.

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