Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Transman marry transwoman, please advice.

so close so far, heart, with my heart in my hand

Salam,

I´m a muslim. Unfortunately, I was born female and transexual also known as transgender. Rise as a muslim in Islamic country, for sure someone must learn about Syariah Law, including me..But something that bothered me when I was start a puberty before adolescence, I was known as a -tomboy- and acting like a boy. After the puberty, my body changes into a woman shape (fitrah),  untill I was 23, I have made some research by myself  about transgender in islam,  finally I found a prove that transgender are prohibited in Islamic perspective also.. then I realize it´s Haram because it´s a contradiction beyond Syariah Law.

In Quran also remain that Allah create a couple between Man (he) and Woman (she). It takes a time to me,  I must turn to Allah guide'S.

I tried to make be myself and not make a mistake, till I ask myself  and in love / attracted to  transwoman (male to female). We have  a same common issue and I am attracted because (he) "feminine act"  and makes me very interested to know her (he) more....

Am I should be guilty if I´m marry and he still on her feminine and I still on my masculine gender?..

HayD

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4 Responses »

  1. Assalamu alaykum Hayd,

    I am unable to get to understand your question properly. But from what I understand, I can say:

    Male should marry only female and female should only marry a male. This is in accordance with the law of Allah.

    Now, if you have any problems related to your gender, you should consult a doctor and you should also consult a doctor about the gender of the person you are attracted to.

    If you are a female in all aspects and the other person is male in all aspects and are able to make each other happy by marriage than you should go ahead with it, Insha Allah.

    If you hang in between, undecided on such matters, chances are of going astray from the Path of Allah.

    I am touched and I am happy you are concerned about Shariah and keeping the limits of Allah in your mind.

    Get in touch with a speciallist doctor, see what treatment they prescribe and get the gender issues cleared.

    You are what Allah created you: A female if He created you female and male if He created you male.

    Only Shaytaan tries to change the creation of Allah:

    Allah says in Surah An Nisa:

    118. Whom Allah cursed, and he said: Surely I will take of Thy bondmen an appointed portion,
    119. And surely I will lead them astray, and surely I will arouse desires in them, and surely I will command them and they will cut the cattle's ears, and surely I will command them and they will change Allah's creation. Whoso chooseth Satan for a patron instead of Allah is verily a loser and his loss is manifest.120. He promiseth them and stirreth up desires in them, and Satan promiseth them only to beguile.
    121. For such, their habitation will be hell, and they will find no refuge therefrom.
    122. But as for those who believe and do good works We shall bring them into gardens underneath which rivers flow, wherein they will abide for ever. It is a promise from Allah in truth ; and who can be more truthful than Allah in utterance?
    123. It will not be in accordance with your desires, nor the desires of the People of the Scripture. He who doeth wrong will have the recompense thereof, and will not find against Allah any protecting friend or helper.
    124. And whoso doeth good works, whether of male or female, and he (or she) is a believer, such will enter paradise and they will not be wronged the dint in a date stone.

    I hope you are shown a way by Allah as you are keen on knowing and obeying the Shariah, being a Muslim.

    Insha Allah.

    I hope the advice is of some help to you and I hope I could give you a satsifactory answer to your question.

    You may look forward to other advices from other brothers and sisters and choose the best for yourself.

    Salaam.

    * * *

    Therefor give good tidings (O Muhammad) to my bondmen, who hear advice and follow the best thereof. Such are those whom Allah guideth, and such are men of understanding.- Surah 39, Az Zumar, verse 17-18.

  2. As salamu alaykum, HayD

    Thank you very much for sharing.

    From what I understand you were born female and now you are a male and this person was born male and now is female, I don´t know about the rules of Shariah, what I would recommend you is to talk to someone prepared in these questions an Iman/mufti that may guide you in the best way for both of you, insha´Allah.

    As brother Munib has told you, I too deeply admire your wish to keep under the Straight Path, Alhamdulillah, May Allah(swt) guide every step of our journey, insha´Allah.

    All my Unconditional Respect,

    María
    IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  3. Assalamualaikum... i am so happy to know that u trying to keep up with shariyah and Allah's will...u should consult a specialist doctor and a renowned mufti about both of your orientation. and options.
    may Allah help u.with lots of prayers and respect

  4. I was a girlish lad myself, and during my childhood I use to love wearing clothes of the opposite sex, to the point where I not only did so under my existing garments, but even asked Dua from Allah to transform my penis into a vagina during my teenage years. However I still loved girls during my teenager years and had no inclination towards men. The Shayateen caught me online one day and made me think that I am transgender, the word I heard for the first time. Thereafter I wanted to have an operation, but needed to find out the Islamic guidelines prior to it. After I realized that one of the Signs of the Last Day is that the Shayateen would command man to change Allah Creation and also that Allah cannot make a mistake in any way whatsoever, I began to realize that the reason for my so called "Transsexualism" is because of probably the culture I was surrounded with as I wasn't as playful as other boys and loved dressing up etc during childhood.
    Therefore as you mentioned that your Fitra has your gender, then surely Allah made you to the right gender which you would belong to and if you try to change it, you would see more harm than good later on. I am living as a man now and dont have any such inclinations because I keep myself occupied with the Dhikr of Allah, by listening to Nouman Ali Khan podcasts on my mobile phone, Islamic lectures at night on the computer, constantly remembering Allah etc.
    I pray to Allah to help you out of this situation soon Insha Allah, and may Allah grant you a good spouse in this Dunya who would take you to the Akhira as well

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