Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Unable to have intercourse with my wife

A young Muslim couple, you and I,


My Problem is when I have  intercourse with my wife then this finishes within 1 minute. So, My wife & I am also are not satisfied with this problem. When I get excited then some semen  comes out &  continues coming out before intercourse. So, I mined that its problem occur to me to intercourse period.

A  few years ago, I masturbated and  suddenly I saw some semen coming out when I got excited.  This problem occured to me before my marriage. I thought that if I marriage that this problem will solve automatically, but my idea is wrong.

Please help me, how I can remove this problem & give Dua to me for Remove this Problem.

Thank you


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25 Responses »

  1. Omar, your problem is called Premature Ejaculation. There is a lot of information available about it on the internet. You could see this article by the Mayo Clinic:

    Premature Ejaculation

    As you'll see from the article, there are treatment options available. One is a manual method known as the "squeeze technique" (described in the article). Also, there are topical anesthetics that reduce sensation, so that you do not ejaculate so soon. Anti-depressants are another treatment, since one of the side effects of anti-depressants is delayed ejaculation.

    Of course you should ask Allah to help you and cure you. But you should also seek treatment. As we say in English, "God helps those who help themselves."

    Wael Editor

  2. As salamu alaykum, Brother Omar,

    You will receive a holistic approach about this issue in the page Wael has recommended to you, Alhamdulillah.

    Related to dua, there is a link on duas on top of the page, the seventh one will help you to release anxiety and stress, would be good for you, insha´Allah.

    All my Unconditional Respect,

    María Editor

    • Dear Maria M,

      Please give me a related dua for my related problem.


      • As salamu alaykum brother Omar,

        I cannot give you a dua related to the problem because dua has a deeper meaning than that, but the dua I recommended you already, will help you insha´Allah to be able to release the pressure that this problem is bringing to your chest, it will help you too, insha´Allah, to slow down and remain quiet, and the salat will give you the endurance to perform the exercises I am going to advice you, insha´Allah.

        This is the dua:

        Allaahumma innee (If you are male add: ‘abduka wa ibn abdika ibn amatika; if, however, you are female add: amatuka wa bintu abdika wa bintu amatika), naasiyatee bi yadika qadhin fiyya hukmuka ‘adlun fiyya qadhaa’uka as’aluka bi kulli ismin huwa laka sammayta bihi nafsaka aw anzaltahu fee kitaabika aw allamtahu ahadan min khalqika aw ista’tharta bihi fee ilm al-ghaybi indaka an taj’ala al-Qur’ana al-rabee’a qalbee wa noora basaree wa jilaa’a huznee wa dhahaaba hammee

        (O Allah, I am your servant, son/daughter of your servant, my forelock is under your firm grips, Your decree in my case is sure to be realized, and Your judgment is just. I ask of You by invoking every single name that you possess, with which You have called Yourself, or You have revealed in Your scripture or You have instructed any of Your creation or You have kept hidden with Yourself in the knowledge of the unseen realities to make the Qur’an the spring of my heart, light of my eyes, and dispeller of my grief and remover of my anxieties).

        Please, there is a physical exercise routine, called "Kegel Exercise" that can be practiced by men and women and consists on working out your pubococcygeus muscles (PC) muscles, which are responsible in men´s cases of controlling the flow of semen and urine. Are easy to practice and will help insha´Allah. Here are taught by physiotherapists but you can find information about it and the routine in internet, in case you want to be anonimous. Other kind of exercises that will help you a lot would be Pilates exercises, if you read about its fundamentals and its origin, it is very interesting; other one is Yoga. But this has to be done with the right intention, it has to be done releasing the pressure of the shoulders to get the maximum benefit from it, insha´Allah.

        Try to eat home cooked food, plenty of variety, colours and different styles of cooking, you need once a day a dish that has been cooked with a quick boiled at the begining and low fire for at least 30 minutes, one hour, this can be the main dish, insha´Allah.

        Slow down in your case is very important, your life seems to rush at the speed of the Light, I understand that we are in a competitive way, but controlling everything, being so effective and moving so fast, needs to be balanced, and to balance you have to lose the control in some area of your life, in this case, your sexual life. How to find balance? Little by little, eating well ( you need to be nutritionally balanced), doing the kegel exercises will give you the confidence of doing something to improve your situation, seeing othe alternatives while improving this condition like playing with your wife, learning about her, letting her explores you and play with you, sex is not just related to sexual organs, we have a full body to be interested in( head, neck, arms, back, bellys, legs, and all the rest), take this preparation as the opportunity to stop and learn many things, you wouldn´t learn in any other way. Try that your wife would be fully involved in the situation, you are a team and both of you have to learn from the situation, it is something that affect both of you, she is in this with you, insha´Allah, Alhamdulillah.

        If you need anything else, just let me know.

        All my Unconditional Respect,

        María Editor

        • Assalamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh,

          Dear María M,

          You mention me a helpful dua, Please give me this dua in Arabic word. Because of English Pronunciation is not helpful to Pronounceable Arabic word. So, Please Arabic Word mention me & it's duas reference.

          • Walaykum as salam Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh, Brother Omar,

            You have the dua in arabic at the end of the following article,


            This one can be quite useful for you, insha´Allah,


            Both belong to, the first one written by Jinan Bastaki and the second one by Reehab Ramadan.

            There is a very interesting book on duas that you may want to read, one of the writers of this site (Stranger) shared with us the following book in pdf about duas, I find it extremely helpful, Alhamdulillah;


            I found this other duas in arabic for you too,

            Du’as for anxiety/difficulty

            اللَّهُمَّ إنِّي أعُوذُ بِكَ مِنَ الْهَمِّ وَ الْحَزَنِ ، وَ الْعَجْزِ وَ الْكَسَلِ ، وَ الْبُخْلِ وَ الْجُبْنِ ، وَ ضَلَعِ الدِّيْنِ وَ غَلَبَةِ الرِّجَالِ

            Allahumma inni a’udhubika minal hammi wal hazan, wal ‘ajzi wal kasal, wal bukhli wal jubn, wa dhala’id-dayni wa ghalabatir rijaal
            O Allah! I seek refuge in You from grief and sadness, from weakness and from laziness, from miserliness and from cowardice, from being overcome by debt and from being overpowered by men (other people)
            [Sahih al-Bukhari 7:158]

            اللَّهُمَّ إنِّي اُنْزِلُ بِكَ حَاجَتِىْ وَ اِنْ قَصُرَ رَابِىْ وَ ضُعْفَ عَمَلِى افْتَقَرْت ;ُ اِلى رَحمَتِكَ

            Allahumma inni unzila bika haajati wa-in qasuura rubbi wa du’fa ‘amali iftaqartu illa Rahmatika
            O Allah! I ask You to answer my needs, though my intellect is weak, and my actions are defective, O Allah! I am in need of Your Mercy

            حَسْبِيَ اللهُ وَنِعْمَ الْوَكِيلُ

            HasbiyAllahu wa ni’mal wakeel
            Allah is my availer and protector and the best of aids.

            I hope this helps, Insha´Allah.

            Allah(swt) knows best.

            All my Unconditional Respect,


    • Dear Sister Maria M,

      You mention me Kegel Exercise to helpful remove my problem. Please You explain me Kegel Exercise & How I follow this Exercise? If you reference any video related to this exercise, it's also helpful to me.



  3. Assalamu alaykum brother,

    Brother, make du'aa to Allah. Insha Allah He will help.

    You may allow what is happening right now and then once it happens (as you put in your question), after a few seconds start loving your wife again and Insha Allah you will be fine and able to achieve what you want to.

    Remember when you are done, still your wife may not have got what she wants. So stay right there, make all your actions pleasing to her and give her pleasure until she also gets what she wants. Thank Allah for what He gave you and seek refuge from Shaytaan.

    Let your mind think good and postive. Insha Allah slowly with time the problem will get solved.

    Know your mind, know your body, know your pleasure and displeasure and act in the right way. Be patient. Take things slowly and be very positive and happy whenever you are with your wife.

    Hope the advice helps.

    Your brother.

    • Brother Munib,

      Assalamu Aliekum,

      Jajakallah. Please describe me your advice for Help me to able to intercourse with my wife.



      • Assalamu alaykum Brother Omar,

        Women visit this page and so I did not want to explain with usage of words which may seem inappropriate to the women readers and editors on this website.

        But as you ask me to explain, I give you explanation.

        I am not married yet and I have no practical experience of having intercourse with a woman.

        But what I can say from knowledge and common sense is that as you wrote in your question in that in excitement you ejaculate and cannot have intercourse with your wife due to this reason.

        I suggest that you let this happen. Let the ejaculation take place. After it is done, start loving your wife again, start arousing each other by words and actions. Begin foreplay again, I hope this will cause you to get excited again and perform intercourse with your wife.

        What I also suggested to you in my previous post in short it what I have read in articles in papers that when need orgasm just as men and a lot of women remain unsatsfied because their husbands are not able to do that.

        So once you ejaculate and get orgasm, do not leave you wife, continue loving her until she also reaches orgasm. If you do this, Insha Allah your wife will be pleased with you.

        Also, women desire that their husbands continue to love them even more and so they would be happy with multiple orgasms i.e more than one. Depends on the two of you. what you both prefer, enjoy and are happy with.

        Keep some time gap in between each orgasm, depends on the man and the woman, can be a few minutes, can be more.

        Love her with your heart more. Do not rush, go slowly. Do not just think that women want only intercourse and it is over. Women want men to "stay" with them before and after that doing things which they like and you may ask your wife what she likes, get in to some communication.

        Be confident, feel of yourself as the best lover in the world and make all your efforts to give her good company, comfort and satisfaction.

        Insha Allah, if you do this, she will be very happy with you.

        Du'aa is from your heart, any du'aa you like.

        For example: O Allah ! Leave not in my body any defect, give me good health and help me to content my wife with the love with which we both would be happy.

        Hope this helps.

        Your brother.

        P.S: Brother Wael, if there is breach of the code of conduct of the wesbite in the post do not hesitate to remove it. I posted my reply in a sober language before but brother Omar wanted an explanation.

        • For a single guy, you gave pretty good advice ma-sha-Allah. I'm sure you'll make your future wife very happy Insha'Allah - 🙂


        • Munib,

          Assalamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh,

          How are you? Are you know Kegel Exercise? If yes Please explain me Kegel Exercise & How I follow this Exercise? It's helpful to me. I seek it on Internet but I don't Understand it. Please explain me this exercise to easy understanding.

          • Assalamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh,


            How are you.. Now only I am reading your questions and answers for my reference..

            How are you now.. have your problems solved?

        • Very very good explanation brother...

  4. Hi there,

    Although I can't offer religious advice I can offer some practical advice on this subject as I do have experience in this area.

    To all editors, if this is at all offensive or in-appropriate please don't hesitate to remove my comments.

    One way to make intercourse last longer with your wife is to ejaculate before hand, this would require some "alone time" before you approach your wife, and I realise that it may be seen as a sin but if it is for the purpose of treating this condition I would hope forgiveness would be given?

    There is also a wide variety of items that can reduce the chance of premature ejaculation. These are simply rubber rings that are placed round the base of the shaft and as they are quite tight they reduce the chance of ejaculation and can make intercourse last longer.

    However Brother Muniib makes a very valid point. It isn't all about the act itself, intimacy is much deeper than intercourse, spend time getting to know your wife's body and ensuring she takes pleasure from the act and achieves satisfaction. Most importantly, love your wife.

    Best of luck to you!

    Ruby 🙂

    • Salaams Sister,

      To encourage masturbation"alone time" is not the proper thing to do, unless is done by the spouse, and this will constitute a way of getting to know each other and to give pleasure one to the other. Sexuality is team work if any of the partners go by themselves, it would be felt as a betrayal.

      All my Unconditional Respect,

      María Editor

    • Ruby83,

      I read your comments & I also read your comments feedback to Maria M. So, I want to you helpful advice to me.

      God bless all of you.



  5. Dear Admin,

    Pls dont entertain Omar further on this.. by reading all the above post its clearly showing he just needs a fun and timepass. if he really wanna know kejal exercise he can view it on youtube.. but he is getting adamant and asking the same question number of times despite his query has been answered.

    Shoaib, Dubai....


    All males facing this problem please read Surah Furqan verse number its meaning....i am not stating it as a cure fr P.E but as a dua fr better married life...May ALLAH help us all.


  7. salaam be upon you.

    there is a du'aa which should be recited during the day time.

    it is
    Allaahumma 'aafinee fee badanee, Allaahumma 'aafinee fee basaree, Allaahumma 'aafinee fee sam'ee.
    Allaahumma innee a'uuthbika minal kufri wal faQri, wa 'auuthubukka minal 'athaabil Qabri"
    3 times during the day.

    it means Oh Allaah strenghten me in my whole body, Oh Allaah strenghthen me in my sight, Oh Allaah streghthen me in my hearing.
    Oh Allaah i seek refuge in you from disbelief and poverty and i seek refuge in you from the punishment of the grave"

    repeat 3 times.

    Also please keep in mind that life is not all about fullfilling the desire, you shouldnt worry about it too much, if you yourself can satisfy your desire, then alhamdulillaah.

    in fact Sayyidnaa 'Umar [radiallaahu a'nhu] married many many many women in his life time, as he divorced women very very often and married other ones.
    but he cleared himself and in fact said he had no desire for women at all so that people dont think that umar goes after women for desire.

    he [ra] said

    "i donot marry women for desire, had it not been for children, i would not care if my eyes would never catch a glimpe of women"

    he also said

    "i force myself to have sexual intercourse, the only reason why i do it is so that Allaah may bring from me a child who will remember him and glorify him, and thats the only reason why i sleep with women"

    • Some of what you have said here is correct, but I need to correct something that you said about 'Umar ibn Al-Khattab (ra). He did not divorce women often and marry other ones. 'Umar had a total of 7 wives in his lifetime, who bore him 13 children. Some of these wives were married in the Jahiliyyah, before 'Umar became Muslim. He divorced those wives after he embraced Islam, at Hudaybiyah to be exact. As far as I know he never divorced any of his Muslim wives.

      Wael Editor

      • erm...try doing wudhu before intercourse washing ur provates with cold water, and delay intercourse until she has been satisfied using foreplay.

        in worst case hmmm...use a sexual aid....that will keep your erection after you are satisfied, that way at least your wife can still gain some pleasure. I think the technique is partial binding(also known as genital binding), where a lace is wrapped around the base and scrotum tight enough to keep the blood inside, it has to be reasonably tight and not be painful.

        sorry for the explicit detail...anything to help out hey. Good luck

        oh yeh...Disclaimer: you are advised to consult your doctor first before trying any of the above 🙂

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