IslamicAnswers.com: Islamic Advice

"Am I still married to a man in Algiera?"

Question:

asalamalaykum,

My name is Asiya, I converted to Islam 7 years ago, alhamdulillah, but within that time frame I have managed to get myself into a messy situation and I do not know how it should be interpreted Islamically.

After conversion I rushed into a marriage with an Algerian brother. I married him somewhat unwillingly but wanted to please others who were pressuring me to accept. We got married in Algeria and consumated it there.

Later, I returned to the US to file for his visa but there were too many problems and we decided to get a divorce before he had a chance to join me here in the US.

He had a conference telephone call with my local imam and me and 3 witnesses and pronounced divorce 3 times as prescribed. Later he informed me that he went to the courts and filed the paperwork. Months later he said the divorce was finalized then he vanished. I called my former in-laws to confirm and they also said it was final and the courts didnt send my paper because I was a foreigner so it was delayed... but not to worry because it was already final so I didnt have to worry about anything. I fulfilled my iddat and later remarried to a new brother and have been married to him for almost 4 years since then.

This is where it gets confusing: I was recently contacted by the former brother and he said he never actually filed the paperwork and he wanted to go forth with it now. He and his family lied to me for over 4 years about the divorce. So I was legally married to 2 men at the same time! Wallah I never would have done that if I had known. Since I found out about it I have been denying my new husband sexual rights because I don't know if it is zina. The divorce is now finalized, or so he says, but I wont have proof of it for a couple months.

Was the phone conference sufficient for an Islamic divorce or do the courts in an Islamic country have the final say in the matter? Is my marriage to my new husband invalid? Am I living in sin to stay with my new husband?

Please help me. I need some Islamic advice, and the evidence to support it, so I can decide what to do and live in peace.

On another note, the first man never paid my mahr because I agreed to wait until he moved to the US. In addition, he never gave me any money to support me while married. I worked and paid for my own requirements. Now he is demanding that I pay for half of the divorce fees. I don't have the money to pay it. Does he have a right to ask me for divorce fees? I'm afraid if he is lying about everything again just to try to get money from me. I dont plan on sending any. Should I trust him about the paperwork this time?

Thanks. Jazakallahu khayran

- Asiya

Sister Noorah's Answer:

Bismillahi Rahmani Rahim

Dear Asiya, Salaam Alaikum wa Rahmatullah

Hello Sister Asiya. I'm sorry you've been confused by this situation. It sounds as if you are striving to do the right thing, and inshAllah we can resolve this pretty easily.

Divorce in Islam is in the hand of the man. If he pronounced the "talaaq", then immediately after that, you are considered to have had one divorce. Please note that it is not necessary to say the divorce three times, and it only counts as one divorce. During this time, when a woman is in her 'iddah, he has the right to take her back. If the 'iddah is complete, she is divorced completely and is free to marry again. This is the situation you are in. Regardless of the "legal" paperwork in Algeria or the US or any country, according to the laws of Islam you were a free woman at the time you married your current husband and you do not need to concern yourself about the secular paperwork.

Your first husband might be restricted from remarrying by the Algerian government, even though technically a Muslim man can marry up to four women, but since Algeria does not rule according to Islam their laws may restrict him. That has nothing to do with you.

He can send the papers or not send them, and if it is convenient for you, you can sign them if needed, or simply ignore them. You have moved on with your life, and since his family has deceived you for this long time, you do not owe them any consideration.

May Allah bless you in your current VALID marriage  and make you and your husbands helpers to one another in striving for Jannah. Please be sure to be extra nice to him for his understanding and patience during this trying time.

As far as the mahr, he obviously is not going to pay it, and he cannot compel you to pay for the divorce fees. It sounds as if he is a man in sore need of guidance, may Allah give him hedayah, but that is not your problem now.

Remember, it is the ISLAMIC marriage and divorce that is important in the sight of Allah; the legal marriage in the country of residence, be it the US or Algeria or another country, is important as far as securing your rights and protecting yourself legally, but it does not affect the validity of your marriage now. And Allah knows best.

I found a link on http://www.islam-qa.com that addresses a different but similar issue, and if you search the site I'm sure you will find more information relevent to your case:

http://www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/106429/legal%20divorce