Islamic marriage advice and family advice

We want to get married – what problems will we face?

Day and night

Assalamu Alaikum ....

I met her in my office one year back ...through phone calls (official), I used to talk her since my job is at site.. she is newly joined in our office.... So one day I was changed to office and soon after I met her and I was also attracted to her. Days passed we started talk and we began to like each other.. finally relationships has to end in marriage. so then the problems..

She is christian divorced woman (age 25) from my neighboring country and myself unmarried (aged 27)...When coming to marriage she is ready to embrace Islam and marry me....

My parents and family members will not be agreeing for this..likewise her parents and family members too ,,its a question mark !!!????

But we like each other and  also if Allah wills we are ready to marry and live together....

Since she is from different religion, divorced, different country. I am confused what are all the problems in front of me religious wise and family wise...

Please  Advice....

shahid.afridisweet

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2 Responses »

  1. OP: Since she is from different religion, divorced, different country. I am confused what are all the problems in front of me religious wise and family wise...

    Have you slept with her already? If so you should marry her? I don't think her family is a problem if she is willing to convert to marry you.

  2. I think the best thing to do is to check and remember what you really want in a person. Did you meet each other in a halal way? Were the conversations around other people and appropriate? Is she willing to embrace Islam from the bottom of her heart? Does she know what's required of an Islamic marriage? Do you have a clear intention to building an Islamic household?

    If she fits all of this, I believe it's best you go to an Imam or highly respected person who is a sincere Muslim and get them to give you sound advice. Make sure the girl takes the shahadah too, direct her to a Muslim sister who can help her do so. Also, I strongly advise you to do istikharah, which is a prayer in which afterwards you make a dua asking Allah to help you make a decision and to make it easy for you if it's good for you. There's instructions on how to do it in this website.

    I know you are really happy with this prospective woman, but remember that after marriage, almost all couples have some sort of disagreements at time, and it's very important to have family give you advice. Would you be able to cope with that? Also, from her side she may end up dealing with her family disowning her or such. It takes great patience to deal with a convert as well. When they're new to the religion it brings new emotions, worries, and lots of practice and mistakes, and stuff. On top of a relationship, and relationships always require hard work and sacrifice.

    If you decide not to go through with it, don't become depressed either. Ask your parents, or the Imam, or any good Muslim brothers to help you search for a Muslim woman. You will indeed be rewarded for your efforts when you stay on the right path.

    Following the Qur'an and the Sunnah are your best bet, which is how I brought all of these conclusions. I hope they can help. These are from my own observations and advice.

    Please do istikharah and consult with an Imam. Pray to Allah, for dua is the weapon of a believer.
    Take care.

    Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh

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