Islamic marriage advice and family advice

What should I do? -ABUSE-

Note ; this is going to be a long post because it will contain a lot of details.

al salamu alaykom

i am a girl that is 16 years old. all my life I've been tortured by one person ; my mother. before , when i was younger, she was much nicer (my age was between newborn- 6). she would tell me to say the truth and she wouldn't get mad at me for it. and when i did say the truth she didn't get mad and simply kept her promise.

as i began to get older her attitude changed. now my grandma (my dad's mother) is a little rough with her kids. and my mom told me that my grandma told her to be rough too. and not to be all lovely with her children (i think my grandma meant spoiled). but i think my mom took this the wrong way. i remember once when she told me to say the truth , and i did, i remember getting beaten and crying my heart out. i would go to bed whispering '' i hate you'' without her hearing me. ( because deeply inside i still loved her but i was confused). but i think as i grew up, her beating became worst. like before she would only hit me on my back really hard. then it increased to the point were now she would : 1- kick me , 2-pull my hair to the extent were i felt like I'm going to be bald any second, 3- intense yelling ,4-non-stop hitting. according to few sites and few questions answered, it was officially claimed that i was abused. i remember her hitting me when i get an attitude sometimes. but the latest one (which was 2 months ago) was because of a paper ! (story ; the school gave us a promo code to use for college that would give u a 60% on college fees or something like that. my mom wanted me to ask the school about it i said ''ok'' then she told me that i care for the phone blah blah blah i told her '' what should i do at this moment , what do u want me to do'' then she started hitting me claiming i have a bad attitude talking back (although it's not the first time talking back) yet i do admit talking back is bad but i simply need to answer ur question and need to stand up for myself,. if standing up for yourself is considered attitude then i don't know what to do at this point) the reason was so stupid that got me thinking like '' she hates me'' ''she doesn't want me'' and stuff like that. before i wanted to kill myself (didn't because it was Haram and i am a coward) then i choose to run away ( but i was 11 at that time so i knew that i wouldn't be helpless in that big world) but I'm seriously thinking this over again. because i might if this keeps up. my dad is a different subject to be honest. he is never home and when he is he either sleeps or he is on his phone. he also has a member (a very very very short one) thats why i never spoke to my dad about it.

my mom and dad are also bad at giving advise, you see when i was small I've always walked on my toes. instead of being like '' oh , sweet your walking on your toes again'' or '' maybe wanna get down now'' or something silly like that. they either yell saying ''PUT YOUR TOES DOWN '' or start mimicking me (over exaggerated) '' you look like a damn chicken stop it'' i know this is a bad thing about me but it is a habit of mine.

she is also two-faced (even with her OWN friends) and she claims that everyone loves her

there is even more worst things with my mother but this is the ones I'm suffering with the most. the rest allah yustur.

the reason i included a lot of details its because i want you to help me with everything. i even thought to the extent were i would travel to a different country and start a new life. but i seriously don't know what to do

please help me and jazakom allah khayir


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2 Responses »

  1. One thing plz pray 5 time a day and keeping dua snd read QURAN WITH TRANSLATION in this way you can satisfy and connect with ALLAH and never lose hope and ignore your mother,s behaviour .

  2. Where do you live, Darling? Because my first thought is that you should talk to some kind of authority for the protection of minors. What your mother is doing is absolutely horrendous and wrong, and while we, as Muslims and human beings, are to respect our parents, I believe no one has to tolerate this kind of disgusting abuse. Even from our parents. It's no wonder you're feeling suicidal, anyone would in your situation.

    You need to report your mother and get out of her house. Do you have trusted family members you can stay with? If not, then I'm sure Child Protective Services in your country will help relocate you, away from your abusive mother.

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