Islamic marriage advice and family advice

What should I do for Allah to forgive me?

repent forgive

The Door of Allah's Forgiveness is Still Open!

I'm now a 19 year old Muslim girl. When I was 13 years old I thought or maybe I did fall in love with a girl at my school but whatever it was we felt likewise so we kissed a few times 4/5 that's it. Then I changed my school and got attached to a new girl here and developed similar feelings for her and soon it felt like I could not stay away from her. We went further to committing the sin of sex like we touched each other in a haram way. I was at that time 16. After a little while we stopped talking by fortune/fate which I now believe it to be a way in which Allah wanted me to stop and return to Him for which I'm thankful to Him.

Since then I regret all my doings everyday every single second since the time I've realized how huge of a sin this is. I have not touched her or anyone else since then neither do I intend to nor do I feel sexually attracted to any girl.

I've promised myself and Allah never to repeat this horrible sin again. I want Allah to forgive me. Is it possible? What verses should I recite to get Allah's mercy? Please tell.

Also is it possible for us to have contracted something from the sexual act that we committed? Like a disease or something even if none of us had an STD because we have never sexually come in contact with anyone before?

Please reply asap. Thank you.


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9 Responses »

  1. AsSalaamu 'alaikum my dear little Brother,

    First of all, I commend you on your efforts to reach where you are today (from 13 to 16 -19), mashaAllah. In fact, you deed a great job, mashaAllah.

    You said, ''After a little while we stopped talking by fortune/fate which I now believe it to be a way in which Allah wanted me to stop and return to Him for which I'm thankful to Him.''

    Honestly, I had to ponder much over the above beautiful statement by you, due to the two great wonders of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala that it indicates. First, for choosing you and guiding you, and second, for blessing you with the great wisdom of realizing His great blessings and purposes of you, and being able to be grateful to Him for that--not everyone is blessed with this. ''Such is Allah's guidance. He guides with it whomever He wills of His servants...'' (Quran 6:88)

    My dear Brother, I'd like to show you something beautiful, and if you stick to it inshaAllah, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala will continue to love you dearly and forgive you all your sins, and He will make you one of His righteous servants in this life and the next inshaAllah. It is about the ten ways of increasing your love for Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, in order to gain His special Love and Satisfaction.

    Shaykh Ibn al-Qayyim (Rahimahullahu Ta'ala) says: "The reason which cause mahabbah
    (love) of Allaah to develop, are ten:

    First: Reciting the Qur'aan, reflecting and understanding its meaning and its intent.

    Second: Drawing closer to Allaah – the Most High – through optional deeds, after fulfilling the obligatory duties.

    Third: Being continuous in the dhikr (remembrance) of Allaah, with the tongue, the heart and the limbs – under all circumstances. The more continuant the dhikr, the more muhabbah develops and intensifies.

    Fourth: Giving precedence to what Allaah loves over personal loves, when being overcome by desires.

    Fifth: Contemplating and deliberating over the Names and Attributes of Allaah.

    Sixth: Recognizing and remembering the favors and bounties of Allaah – both manifest and hidden.

    Seventh: To be humble and submissive before Allaah – and this is the greatest matter.

    Eighth: To be in seclusion reciting the Qur'aan, during that time in which Allaah descends to the lowest heaven (which is the last third of every night), finishing this recitation with seeking Allaah's forgiveness and repenting to Him.

    Ninth: To sit in the gatherings of the true and sincere lovers of Allaah, reaping the fruits of their speech, and not to speak except if there is benefit in it and that you know that such talk will increase you in goodness and that it will benefit others as well (today, this could be achieved by listening to Islamic lectures, especially those on the topic of Taqwa).

    Tenth: To stay clear of all those causes which distances the heart from Allaah – the Mighty and Majestic.

    It is by these ten motives by which the the Lovers reached the spiritual stations of Love and entered upon their Beloved (Allah).

    The frame of all that is two things:

    -1. Preparing the soul-spirit for this matter.

    -2. Opening the eye of Baseerah (insight). And success is by Allah.

    (Madaarij as-Saalikin, by Imam Ibn Al-Qayyim, v 3, p 16-17)

    You may also be interested in Salatul-Tasbih. It is recorded in Sunan Abi Dawud and other books of hadith that Rasulullah (sallallahu `alayhi wasallam once said to his uncle Hadrat `Abbas (r.a.) :

    O Abbas! O my uncle! Shall I not give you a gift? Shall I not show you something by means of which Allah Ta`ala will forgive your sins, the first and the last of them, the past and recent, the unintentional and the intentional, the small and huge, the secret and open?

    Rasulullah (sallallahu `alayhi wasallam) then taught him the Salah al-Tasbih. Furthermore he advised him that it be offered daily, if possible. If not then every Friday or once a month or once a year or at least once in one's life time...Please follow the link for more:

    As for the STD, please check that with your doctor, inshaAllah, and I believe that you would be ok since Allah is behind you, inshaAllah.

    May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala help you and us all, dear Brother. Ameen!

    • Assalam alaikum Br. Issah,

      The OP is a girl and is/was struggling with feelings for girls.

      • Wa 'alaikum as-salaam warahmatullahi wabarakaatuh sister Saba,

        I just notice this and went through the original post and my response again. However, I think the content of my response remains the same except the changing of ''brother'' to ''sister''.

        Jazak Allah khair al-Jaza for the information.

    • as-salaamu 'alaikum wa-rahmatullah,

      First of all, mashAllah good advice from Issah, particularly the beautiful advice from ibn al-qayyim (the scholar of the heart)!
      Secondly, according to the greatest website in the world...
      majority of scholars are of the view that salaat ut-tasbeeh is a bid'ah (innovation), and the hadith concerning this is actually fabricated, or very weak.

      First of all, none of the four imaams (Abu Hanafa, Imam Malik, Shafi'i, Ibn Hanbal) mentioned this.
      The earliest Imam Ahmad mentioned that it was not saheeh (authentic);
      Imam an-Nawawi mentioned that the hadeeth was da'eef (weak);
      Sheikh ibn Uthaymeen mentioned this hadeeth as being da'eef (weak);
      Sheikh al-Islam, Ibn Taymiyah mentioned it is fabricated.

      Furthermore, if you analyse the prayer, it seems extremely odd in how it is performed, along with the "counting game" that you have to play during the prayer.
      And if there was such virtue in it, we would have many narrations from the companions who performed the prayer, along with the Prophet (sallallahu 'alayhi wassallam), or at the very least, the 4 imaams.

      My advice to sister "islamicleaner" is that mashAllah, you should know that the Prophet sallallahu 'alayhi wassallam mentioned that when Allah loves His slave, He blesses him with the knowledge of the deen.
      If you read the Qur'aan, repentance is simple... simply open your heart and make duaa sincerely and ask Allah for forgiveness... after-all, Allah is as-sami' ud-duaa, at-tawaab ur-raheem.
      And resolve to never do it again.

      In a famous hadith...
      Abu Bakr al-Siddeeq (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: “There is no one who commits a sin then purifies himself well and stands and prays two rak’ahs, then asks Allaah for forgiveness, but Allaah will forgive him. Then he recited this verse: ‘And those who, when they have committed Faahishah (illegal sexual intercourse) or wronged themselves with evil, remember Allaah and ask forgiveness for their sins; — and none can forgive sins but Allaah - and do not persist in what (wrong) they have done, while they know’ [Aal ‘Imraan 3:135].”

      This is also called salat at-tawbah, which is attributed directly to the Prophet sallallahu 'alahi wassallam: -

      and may Allah al-ghafoor ur-raheem forgive us and increase us in knowledge of the deen, and bless us with the love and fear of Allah, ameen!

      was-salaamu 'alaikum wa-rahmatullah.

      • Wa 'alaikum as-salaam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh brother ibnMuhammad, and Jazak Allahu khair al-Jaza.

        Before, I also used to doubt the authenticity of Salatul-Tasbih and did not talk about it nor encourage it--and I was very much influenced by the logic that Sheikh ibn al-Uthaimeen (Rahimahullah Ta'ala) used against it. However, recently, I did a research regarding the matter through a wider and broader perspective, which led me to accepting the hadith as authentic, and the Salat as Sunnah and Mustahab (desirable).

        Some may wonder why the hadith regarding this Salatul-Tasbih was never mentioned by many other Sahabah (radhiyallahu 'anhum), however, that can't be a proof to reject it even if it was mentioned by only one Sahabi--examples of many authentic hadiths being mentioned by only one Sahabi (especially Mu'adh bin Jabal) are plenty in authentic books of hadith. The Rasool sallallahu 'alaihi wasallam used to spread gifts (which were not necessarily obligatory issues), and anyone lucky to be around him during those occasions would receive such gifts, even if it was only one Sahabi around him--obviously, this was what happened with the hadith of Salatul-Tasbih and others as well.

        The three first Imams (Abu Hanifa, Malik, and Shafi'i--Rahimahumullahu Ta'ala) did not hear about this hadith at all (this is according to the scholars), and therefore we can't say anything about their opinions in this matter. However, the last Imam (Ahmed bin Hanbal--Rahimahullahu Ta'ala) heard about the hadith through some of its weak chains, and based on that, he classified it as weak, however, an authentic chain of the same hadith was mentioned to him later on, and he approved that chain to be authentic (based on this, many scholars have ruled that he changed his opinion).

        Please see the following fatwa by Scholars on regarding this matter.


        Muslim scholars are of two opinions about the ruling of Tasbeeh prayer.

        First: It is desirable.

        Second: It is not permissible.

        The reason for this disagreement is their differences regarding the authenticity of a Hadith in this matter.

        The majority of the known scholars of Hadith believe that the Hadith is sound. So, they are of the opinion that offering Tasbeeh prayer is desirable. Those scholars who hold this opinion are al-Daru Qutni, al-Khateeb al-Baghdadi, Abu Musa al-Madani - these scholars also wrote a booklet in this subject - Abu Bakr Bin Abu Dawood, al-Hakim, al-Syooti, al-Hafiz Ibn Hajar, al-Albani and others.

        On the other hand, those who believe that the above Hadith is weak or fabricated issue a decree that Tasbeeh prayer should not be performed. Ibn al-Jawzi, Sirajuddin al-Qazweeni, Sheikh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah, Imam Ahmad and others are among those scholars who hold the later opinion.

        Hafiz Ibn Hajar narrated that Imam Ahmad changed his opinion concerning the weakness of this Hadith. Ali Bin Sayeed al-Nasaee said: 'I asked Imam Ahmad about the prayer of Tasbeeh. He said: 'I do not have any authentic Hadith in this concern'. Then Ali narrated the Hadith from al-Mustamir Ibn al-Rayyan from Abi al-Jawza from Abudllah Ibn Amar. Imam Ahmad asked, ''who narrated to you?'' Ali said: Muslim Bin Ibrahim. He (Imam Ahmed) said: al-Mustamir (a narrator of this Hadith) is trustworthy'. It seems that Imam Ahmad was pleased with of this Hadith. This narration proves that he changed his opinion and inclined to its desirability.

        Finally, the preponderant opinion is that this Hadith through many chains reaches the degree of authenticity. Therefore, offering Tasbeeh prayer is Sunnah.

        Allah knows best.

        Hope this helps inshaAllah, and Allah Ta'ala knows best.

  2. Thank you very much indeed. May Allah bless you all.

  3. As-salamu `alaykum

    All Praise is due to Allah; we begin with His name and
    turn to Him in all of the tests He puts forward to
    strengthen us. May He shower peace and blessings
    upon Muhammad, the Seal of the Prophets, his family,
    companions, and those who follow his way until the Day
    of Judgment. May Allah, the most Kind, most Merciful
    bestow upon you His peace and tranquility and replace
    your sadness and frustration with tawakkul (putting
    one’s trust in Allah), yaqeen (certainty) and sakina
    (divine tranquility).

    First, my dear sister, let me assure you that Allah Most
    High is All-Hearing. He hears the calls of all His
    servants. Allah assures us of this and tells us that He
    hears the du`aa' (supplication) of the supplicant. Allah
    also tells us that if we come to Him walking, He will
    come to us running.

    Never ever despair in your du`aa' to Him, even if you do
    not see your du`aa's being answered. Always remember
    that Allah is as we expect of Him. By this we mean that if
    we make du`aa' and expect that Allah will answer it, then
    Allah will answer our du`aa' .
    But if we make du`aa' and we expect that Allah will not
    answer it, or we are uncertain, thinking He may or may
    not answer it, then
    our du`aa's may not be answered. This is why when we
    make du`aa', we do not say, “Oh Allah, grant me so and
    so in sha’ Allah. ” We must always be definite in our
    du`aa's .

    We do not ask Allah for something and then say
    “if you will” because Allah will only answer it if He wills
    anyway. The other thing that we need to keep in mind is
    the nature of du`aa' that they may be answered in three
    1. It may be answered right away or at a time decreed by
    2. Allah may not answer that specific du`aa' but in its
    place avert some kind of calamity or disaster befalling
    3.Allah may reserve that du`aa' for us and give it to us
    in the Hereafter
    So ,although a person may not see their du`aa's being
    answered immediately, know that Allah may have
    answered it in other ways by protecting us or reserving
    it to be answered in the Hereafter, when we will be even
    more grateful for it being answered
    (i just copy and paste the answer;-) ).. and, remember that Allah is full of forgiveness.. his door of forgiveness is always open wide for all of his servant..(except when you are dying and when the sun is rise on the west)

    • Please do not copy and paste the same response on every post. Take the time to read the post and write an individual response. It's fine to copy and paste portions of text, or to do so occasionally, if it is actually relevant to the post.

      Wael Editor

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