Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Would Allah forgive me?

Assalamu Allaikum, hope you are doing well inshallah. This is my first time telling my problems to someone and i had come across this site when in need. i am a 20 year old sister and need some advice inshallah, i am trying to be practicing and alhamduililah i have a good company of friends who practice the deen, but i have committed sins in the past where i had hurt others feelings and have deceived them and given false hope to a brother when i had seeked knowledge and more understanding of Islam and how it forbids haram relationships i had simply told him that i want to focus on my deen and whoever Allah has destined me to be that will happen regardless of who i wish to marry, but the brother had become angry and depressed but i had left him in that state and feel guilty of doing so. I wish to marry a muslim man one day and work towards making my deen and knowledge of Islam stronger inshallah. but i am scared that whatever i have done in the past will come to light and i will come face to face with whom i have hurt, also afraid that my sins will not be forgiven by Allah (SWT), i feel ashamed and guilty of what i have done. i am from a traditional asian background and my family see me as a very quiet girl who does not do anything wrong and when they praise me with good kind words i feel even more ashamed and guilty, i cry when i get thought of that i have hurt alot of peoples feelings and cannot regain contact in order to apologize. I am afraid that this will be held and shown back to me later on in my future. My friends who practice the deen have told me that Allah will forgive me if i repent sincerely, i cry with tears in my eyes when standing infront of Allah when praying because i feel ashamed of standing on the prayer mat, i feel guilty and small when reading Surah Al-Fatiha when praying, i tend to get teary and not be able to read instead i read in my head. I have been trying to alhamduililah get in the routine of praying 5 times a day but i dont know if Allah will forgive me for all the bad sins and things i have committed i am afraid my sins are too big for Allah to forgive. I fear Allah and his punishment, when i am free i do research and read up on Allahs punishment and it makes me wonder whether i will be forgiven as i dont want to go through that! Please offer me some guidance and advice inshallah. This is my first time opening up properly and have never come on these types of websites to seek advice. Jazakallhu Khairan

Maliha..a


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4 Responses »

  1. Dear sister Maliha,

    In shaa Allah you are keeping well.

    I read your post (your situation) and I felt that you are such a beautiful person with an amazing soul. It seems like you have a heart of gold that very few have, ma shaa Allah. What makes you amazing is your sincerity. I felt as though you are someone who truly cares about herself (her soul). Please don't think Allah swt won't forgive you. Allah swt loves those who sin and then realises their sin, regrets and immediately and sincerely turns to HIM for forgiveness. In one Hadith, prophet said that Allah swt says:

    ‘O son of Adam, as long as you call on Me, I shall forgive you of what you have done, and think nothing of it.
    O son of Adam, even if your sins were to reach up to the clouds in the sky, and then you were to ask for My forgiveness, I would forgive you and think nothing of it.
    O son of Adam, even if you were to come to Me with sins nearly as great as the earth, and then you were to meet Me after death, not worshipping anything besides Me, I would bring you forgiveness nearly as great as the earth.’” [Tirmidhi]

    And subhan Allah by the sound of your post you have repented sincerely and now in shaa Allah you have to accept that Allah swt has forgiven you. Please don't dwell. You need pick yourself up and those you think you have hurt try to seek their forgiveness too, but if this is not possible try to be nice to them and try to do lots of good voluntary acts.

    In regards to that boy. Please continue not to get in touch with him at all. Let him be. This is because he is non mahram to you (stranger) and so it is best to.break all contacts with the opposite gender.

    Focus on yourself. Continue to make yourself more better person in.terms of your religiosity and good conduct with people. Also focus on your studies. Find something that you find interesting and that it would eventually result to a decent job. Work for couple of years. Also do your driving (if you haven't yet). Do some voluntary work. And always be cheerful with ppl. And of course from time to time you may not feel "good enough" and Alhamdulillah then you can always turn to Allah swt and cry your heart out and pray for strength and guidance, in shaa Allah.

    Hope you found my advice helpful. And any day I would love to have a friend or such soul in my life (spiritually connected with Allah swt). @n shaa Allah take care of yourself.

    Also please listen to this lecture by Sh Yasir Qadhi on Repentance:
    https://youtu.be/lmcaRQyftOM

    Best wishes,

    Your sister, Me
    X

    • Asslamu alaikum, I'm in a similar situation.im 18. I feel like I deceived a lot of people, by sending false pics of me. I deeply regret it. I'm think I'm gonna end up in hell for what I did. Just like sister, I have no contact with these people. I have no way to apologise! I'm in deep trouble! I need to find a way to get out of this sin! Can anyone help me? I'm really depressed about it. All I want is to be loved by Allah and saved from the hell fire. Please help me.

      • WalaikumSalaam Sister Selina, i went through the same thing and a few months later I couldn't be happier. All i did was just let go of all the negatives thoughts and focus on myself and how i can get closer to Allah (SWT), I did loads of research and extra readings which made me love my religion for what it is. And all i do now is pray pray pray and make loads of dua for forgiveness, inshallah you get over it in your own time and always remember Allah

        Hope its helped hon,

        Best wishes

        Maliha x

    • AssalamuAlaikum Sister (Me),

      Thank you so mch for your kind and genuine response it really made me feel happy reading it, i have not been on this for awhile so I've just read your response now. Probably a few months later. But truly you are so wonderful and have such an amazing heart to give such a response, i truly was not expecting that.

      I found it very helpful and just to let you know i am 21 now and have been doing exactly what you have stated: to focus on my studies and get my driving going, well not there yet soon inshallah, i am happy and content thanks to Allah (SWT)
      I'd love to become friends you one day inshallah, also hope you are doing well and in good health.

      Best wishes,

      Maliha x

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