Muslim Matrimonials and More's Ask Bilqis


Monday, November 1, 1999


Dear Bilqis,

I need your help. I believe in Islam, but I have strayed.

I am a young woman. Recently, I befriended another young woman about my age. Things were fine until one day after classes when it all got very sinful. I don't know how but it all went out of control and we found ourselves practising desire and giving in to temptation with each other in the shower.

Bilqis, I have to admit I enjoyed it although now we both feel very remorseful and dirty. We didn't tell anyone about it. I think what we did was haram in Islam but I never found the proper verse which refers to women being sexual to each other.

What if I do the things Islam requires of a woman (marry and bear children and glorify God) but still keep my practise on the side?



Dear M,

Islam is a complete way of life for those who call themselves Muslim. Islam is a choice to follow certain basic tenets which are divinely ordained. Same sex behaviour is unlawful, forbidden, haram.

Sexual activity is based in marriage for the purposes of mutual love and procreation. There are many today who will debate the "pros" and "cons" of this position, nevertheless, it is the Islamic position and one which Islam is prepared to defend both intellectually and spiritually. America is an "open" society which in many ways allows the "freedom" to live as you
believe. This is a benefit to many of us here while at the same time opening the doors to many harmful and sinful alternatives. You need to make the choice. Homosexuality is not compatible with Islam.

I would suggest that you go to: for a topical index on Islamic subjects. There is a section on homosexuality under "H". There are some Qur'anic ayats (verses) also you should look at: 26:165-166, 27:55, and 29:28-29.

Life changes usually should be taken day-by-day always striving to move in the direction you want to go. It is said that if we walk toward Allah (swt), He runs toward us. Associating with other practicing Muslims, getting involved in Islamic activities all would make being a Muslim easier for you -while at the same time avoiding those things inconsistent with an Islamic lifestyle. I wish you the best and hope that Islam and virtue is your choice. Lastly, if you do choose Islam and obedience of Allah, you no longer need to feel dirty about what you did. Simply perform taubah (sincere repentance) and Allah will Insha'Allah forgive your sin and you will be purified of it.

-Bilqis Muslim Matrimonials