I am a Bangladeshi and want to marry a Pakistani
Pakistan and Bangladesh used to be one country before they split. Nevertheless, there are cultural and linguistic differences.
I am a Bangladeshi girl who is in love with. a Pakistani guy & wants to marry him. He likes. me too but not ready yet, but he will change. his decision later. I dont really want to find. out what happened in 1971 as I heard. enough about it. According to Prophet's. hadith, nationalism is haram in Islam.
My dad. already supports Pakistan very much. That is a. plus point for me.
First of all how can. I convince my parents even if he agrees?. How can I prove myself a best daughter in. law to his parents inspite of belonging to other race? I can speak in Urdu & I will learn how to write too, their cuisine, the culture,. whatever needed. I depend on only Allah. (SWT). What is mostly needed to convince. both families? Thank you.
- Honey
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If one has such strong carnel urges that the probability exists of falling prey to haram (including haraam viewing, masturbation of any form) etc. but is at the right age of getting married, then marriage is obligatory (fardh) on him/her. you do not have to have a large wedding inviting hundreds of people spending thousands of pounds on the brides jewlery. the sharia has no sympathy for this type of extravagance and pompous show (expensive wedding). it simply means to be able to afford the necessary maintanance that is a wife's right. to affrain from marriage in this situation would be a SIN. even if one's parents were to insist that he/she stayes single until they finish their studies etc. while they know that they will not be able to stay away from haraam , it would be sinful to obey the parents for there is no obedience to any creature in the disobidience to Allah ( you can't obey your parents and disobey Allah because ALLAH comes first)
(At-Thirmidhi, musannaf ibn abi Shaybah)
its very difficult to convince both of families, because your family can agree for him if he is a good muslim, but his family will not agree for this relation, because i was also in that same situation and i know that also, what pain i am getting,after marry also my husband family did not accept me,they are thinking their son did wrong decision as got marry with me. but they did not think that their son is too much happy as he got marry with me.
about you i can say that only, be carefull in your decision, because his family will not agree and they can that, about culture, society, relative, dignaty, village thats all. because maybe they have something els in their mind for their son and when they will get about your relation with their son than they can keep him far from you. better first tell him to convince to his parents than decide for your marry with him. now he will say you he will manage but later he cant manage,he will do that what parents will tell him, if that is wrong dicision also he cant stop to his parents, better you get more pain later, tell him to convince his parents first.
next decision should be yours.. allah will help you.
my friend is married to a pakistani man everything is alright, unfortunately not all familys are so understanding. sister you dont need to change yourself they should accept you for you, cos some times you do so much and nothin works at the end. slowly things should work out inshallah
salam my name is rabia and i want to know ab this isussee.
i live in australia and and iam divorced, after that i found a person who was really nice to me he approch me for marrige i told him each and everything ab my sutution, and he agree to proceed. we start meetting and stuff. and when am fully invovled with him. now he makes so many excuess he said he cant do this bcoz his family wont be agree for this. bcoz he belongs from a balouch family,
his 38years old his dad is no longer.
he thinks his dad wont be happy if he did marry me.
i want to know if he wants to get marry me wot sarih says?
can he marry me even if his mom is not agree. or if we do a hidden nikha ?
as i need him am lving myself.. and ineed a mahram..i spend 2 years with him and now its not possible for me to leave him.
according to saryah wot sould we do?
if he leaves me just to his persnts will? will it be a good decion for him?
pls do reply me
Heres my story, basically I'm a British born Bangladeshi man with parents who are against any of my family members - including me marrying someone who is from a Pakistani decend because they think this will ruin the family. How is a Muslim marrying another Muslim with a similar ethnicity ruining the family??
You see culture plays a huge part in peoples life nowadays especially families who are brought up in their motherland. I know there will be so many cultural issues if a Bengali man was to marry a Pakistani girl, but this is England. For crying out loud we eat the same food, use similar words in our language, we worship one Allah and follow the teachings and Sunnah of the last messenger Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). So what is the problem? I seen family.... well when two people get married, its not as if family will be around them every split second of their life. Families need to accept somethings in life because life is too short to worry about these things.
You see the problem thesedays about a Bengali marrying a Pakistani is the "1971 liberation war" which many people will not seem to let go. I know a lot of people have died and I AM NOT saying this should be forgotton, but people need to open their eyes and move on because bewteen thoese 42 years - so many muslims around the world are being killed - even little childrens. For example look at Palestine and see how much suffering and pain our Muslim brothers and sisters are feeling etc. We are even being labelled as "Terrorist". So don't you think that something that has happened 42 years ago should be over because no joke but this is turning out to be childish.
I am so against nationalism because Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) prohibited it. I so see every Muslims as equal and they should marry whoever they want to aslong as there will be no issues.
its not childish. Even if you are a bangladeshi but you have not been brought up in Bangladesh so it is impossible for you to understand our emotions.
But ya people falling in love and marrying is not a National Issue and should not be treated as one either.
I know where you are coming from and I don't mean "childish" as if its nothing. When I say "childish" I mean it as people not letting something that has happened a long time ago dissapear. I had relatives and uncles who had to hide when the Pakistani army invaded their village in Bangladesh so I do understand half of the story I guess. Everytime my father brings up the horrible past, I can just about read his eyes and have a clear vision of where he is coming from.
You see when people always think of the past, they let it haunt them again and again as the same thing goes on as if it does not have an ending. Without judging any Bengali or Pakistani people, you need to have a clear view now as what has been happening in Bangladesh for the past 42 years... It hasnt really been a peaceful war-free country. We're even having our own people killing themselves, as soon as a Bengali leaves the house - he/she is kidnapped and slaughtered for their organs.
These same people are begging for their life to be spared but there are no chances as they remain to be killed. How do you think the parents and families of the vicitm feel when they find out that their son/daughter has just been murdered for no reason? Do you think they will still carry on talking about how the Pakistani army killed innocent Bengali's or do you think they will stop thinking of the past and focus more on the ones they have just lost in the hand of the murderers? You see so much has been happening in Bangladesh.. and people still do not seem to ATLEAST ease off from something that has taken place 42 years ago.
I hope I didn't mean to offend anyone, I'm just saying what as everyone is allowed to have their own opinion.
But then again I may be wrong people, so please forgive me if I did mention anything that has offended anyone. All I know is everyone is allowed to give their OWN opinions.
Ive just fallen in-love with a Pakistani girl whom Ive knwon for a very long time and we both are having family issues.
yes it is COMPLETELY childish. we bangladeshis are hopeless we are always naive enough to be played around by politicians. what happened in 1971? we had a dispute with our OWN countrymen. then some of us shortsighted ones collaborated with a foreign country (india) we even had a recent war against in 1965. that foreign country invaded our land. it put its agents and puppets that are trying till this day to stop our self-determination and erase the very reason of our separation in 1947- i.e. we are muslims who want to exercise muslim values. so it is you who does not "understand our emotions" that is the sentiment of any aware bangladeshi. please try to understand that by harbouring these ill-advised and baseless emotions especially against a nation that is probably the most similar to us (pakistan), we are hampering our nation's moral and social development
I completely agree with you. Life's too short for trivial matters. If it's worth being with someone who you feel would be the right life partner for you, than go get married.
Bangladesh and Pakistan's cultural and linguistic differences are minimal. there is considerable overlap in cuisine, language (through urdu speaking communities in both countries and general urdu practice among south asian muslims), culture (desi muslim/farsi influence), etc. in native languages, punjabi and bengali are both indo-aryan languages. not only were the two countries together from 1947, but before they used to often be part of the same empires. cross-migration between these regions happened a lot and there are even many recent families who are stretched across these two countries and india
I am a pakistani man and I am married to a bangali women we were both from a divorced previous marriage background we met through a islamic dating site I belive it was destiny my father and mother love her and my relatives like her to but I did get criticism basically rumours by pakistani community saying well no pakistani women excepted only a bangali would which hurt me and my wifes mother has struggled to accept me but my wife is a strong independent and educated women who knows what she wants she was looking for a god fearing MAN and Allhamdulilah I love my Allah my wifes relatives and famly have excepted me even in Bangladesh my wifes father died befour she was born he was a freedom fighter and fought against the pakistani oppression she has said if my dad was alive he would never agree to this marriage she also got negativity of her community saying why did you marry a pakistani they are all bad but what has kept everything together is our love for each other and faith in Allah swt but I do understand we are both imbasaders of our country's and communityse if we can build our life together be successful and set an example in both community pakistani and bangali then it dosent matter who you are just as long as you are muslim no one is batter then any other Any way sister don't give up with famly preshior if you are both in love then seek Allah's help make lots of Dua and everything will work out