problems with sisters
Asalamu alaikum brothers and sisters.hope you are all fine.
My name is Saja and I am 17 years old. I really need your help regarding a problem I am facing since I was young. And I will really appreciate your advice.
My mother works everyday day & night. She works continuesly in our house. She does all the housework everyday that she dosen't even get a time to rest. Because of that she got a blood pressure. My father took her to the hospital and the doctor said that she need to rest or her health will get worse.
I felt sad for what happened to her.She works so hard in our house without taking a rest and no one is helping her.Six years have past and my mother is in the same condition.She can't walk properly or do anything. So, I decided to start helping her with the housework as I am only the elder girl in the house. I have 6 sisters and 4 brothers and I am the 7th daughter among them and I have three sisters & two brothers younger then me. All my elder sisters have married and my other elder brothers have went for their further educations.So, I live with my parents and my small sisters & brothers.
The problem is that my younger sisters never like to help me with anything. We are always fighting there is no day witch we will not had fight. And it always start if I only ask them to help with the housework. They just start shouting at me or start giving excuses or they just ignore me and continue watching t.v.
As I am going to school so I need time for my studies & my homework. So, I am asking them to help me with some households. My mother is sick nowadays and she can't do anything for her health but she tries strongly to work so I can look upon my studies. But is too hard for me to see her working as she is not well yet my father goes out for his work and my sisters are not doing anything no one helps my mother except me. I always ask them to help her because she is not feeling good but they are not listening to me. They are 12 & 13 years old and my small 6 years old sister she is too young to help me. But mahsallah she tries her best to help me sometimes. But my other sisters are too lazy and do not want to do anything.
I really work too hard in our house that I always sleep late at night and I have to wake up for my school. I work continuesly that I don't get time to complete my school homework or to learn my surah for my Tahfeez. Everyday I am facing the same problem I beg my sisters to help me but they are just ignoring me. They are not doing anything in our house.I do everything from cooking, cleaning the toilets, washing dishes, cleaning the house and doing the laundry and ironing you just can't imagine how much do I work in that house that my feet and my back are paining me too much while I am praying it really makes me realize how much hard my mother feels by doing all this work alone. I can't even study well I becoming very weak nowadays and can't resist it anymore 7 years have past and I am working everyday.
I always fight with my sisters to help me I stay for a weeks and month not speaking to them. They are not at all respecting me as their elder sister they never listen to what I say & it really breaks my heart a lot. Whenever my mother sees me working she ask my sisters to help me but they are not listening to her too.
And sometimes I get angry and just beat them as the work is too much on me and I can't take it anymore. But they just start crying and my father comes and start scolding me. They do lot of things that hurt me. If I tell my father he will not believe me. When ever they get angry of me they just go and lie to my father or mother and they just start scolding me about something I dont even know anything about.
I cry too much I really need help to get out from this situation I really cant take it anymore it is happening with me everyday I always stay alone in my room with no one to speak to I just pray and ask Allah to help me out.
Hope anyone of you brothers and sisters will reply me soon and give a solution to this problem.
May Allah bless you all.
Your sister Saja
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A'W sister,
I understand where your younger sisters are coming from. I am the youngest an i absolutley hated working in the house. I still don't do too much but My sister in law has really helped me mature. Maybe Have fun with them while working. give them incentives, see who can finish their chore first, who ever wins can get ice cream or whoever wins can chose where you girls can go out the next time you can take them out. Give them reasons that they might enjoy working. you tried punishing them, now try rewarding. your sisters just don't understand how hard it is to work let them help you out with these incentives and then later, after they have done hard work, explain to them how much they have helped lighten your burden. inshallah this will help! try it out! may allah bless you and your family. And inshallah your mother will be healthier!
Asalamu Alaikum sister Fatimah
sorry for replying late I was busy with the housework and thank you soooo much for your reply and your kind advice may Allah bless you and inshallah I will try my best.