Confused and Trapped
I am from Asia, and I married to a Muslim black American man. Generally we love each other. But life has been difficult for me. I am confused and feel trapped. My husband has many problems that I never anticipated. I live only to solve his problems. I am a pillar to him but he is not such a support for me. I dont want to be a bad wife or greedy for material world. I am confused how to get out and just be simple single and easy life again.
- Sister Sharu
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Asalaamualaikum Sis...
My dear, I'm sorry for the problems you are experiencing. I have family members who are suffering from some serious problems, but I can't divorce myself from them, no matter how tough it gets, and believe me, it gets tough. I know its different if the one with the problem is your husband, because he's with you all the time, but the same rule still applies...if Allah has instilled the love between you both (Alhumdulillah), it doesnt seem right to walk away from him because things are getting tough. Husband and wife should be there for each other through thick and thin... God forbid if you were afflicted with a problem, you would want your spouse to help you through it...
Having said that, your life shouldnt be just about looking after your husband, otherwise it could make you very depressed and is affecting your well being...which I can see is already happening. There has to be a balance, and depending on the type of problems your husband has, there could be help available to make things easier for you...Carers also need help my dear sister...
...Allah tests us all through different things....some are tested through wealth, health or family etc. Its difficult to give specific advice sis because you havent elaborated on the problems your husband has...but try to get help and also ask Allah to give you strength and patience...
May Allah ease your difficulties and make your marriage flourish...xxx
its easy jus get a divorce
And yes...I also have to agree with Control for a change...in that if what you want to know is how to become single again....you just divorce...
Although I wouldnt advise that...
sis being single is not always simple coz u feel lonely and u luck the love of husband or children.
u should be happy because ur blessed with love of ur husband. as for difficulties no life is without difficulties
life has ups and downs. husband and wife should share their happiness and sadness and support each other. so its not fair to divorce him just because of his probleems. instead of thinking how to get out try to talk with him and make him strong that he himself solves his problems.