He is Christian and he likes alcohol and pork but will convert to Islam for me
salaam everyone, I'm an 18 year old muslim girl and I want to marry a man of 20 years but he is christian, however he stopped practising as a christian when he was 16. he was a penetcostal, where drinking and smoking even watching tv is forbidden. He wanted to have intercourse but I said no, because that is forbidden in Islam. a while later i discovered that he watched porn as well, I asked him to stop and as far as i know he did. I performed Hajj with my parents when I was 16, and I would never even think of touching a bottle of alcohol or smoke, he said he loves me and that he is willing to convert, he said, "I like my alcohol, my pork, my freedom, but for you I will leave it all."
the part that I am really confused about that reverting to Islam is meant to be about Islam, not me, and He isn't doing it for Islam. He researched Islam on the net and he just says its really hard to build up the faith, I told him in december to go to a mosque and talk to someone, and he still hasnt done that. It makes me wonder, if he was to convert, and if we were to get married, how are we meant to raise our kids as good muslims if he is doing it half heartedly, and if we were to get divorced since that is just so common these days, he would go back to the drinking and whatever else he does.
I feel that I should end the relationship, but he said to me once that if we were ever to break up he'd kill himself and I have a family member that killed himself when his wife left him. I would feel very guilty if he killed himself because of me, I would feel very guilty for all the pain and loss of his family because he did it for me and I know what the pain and loss feels like and I dont want to put that on someone else. Please I am very confused I really dont know what to do..
Zarina, NZ
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Sister,
I know its very hard in this life to get marry with some outcast and 95% gets divorce..
becoming muslim is not only good but its i can say allah hu akbar if some one is converting to muslim.
and the things you mention of drinking and eating are strickly prohibited , but you should expect that iman (faith) will stop this all afterwards and always have a good wish from allah.
I suggest you to dont take a quick action , give some time coz you dont know whats is his intension , just to convert into muslim for intercoure or sexual relation or he definetly wants to become muslim as he has a fiath that no one is there for worship but allah and Mohammad.s.a.w.s is the messenger(prophet) of allah.
and let practise upon it ..
and afterwards you can decide..
very important dont allow him to get close to you unless he is converted otherwise even you faith will be in problem sister.... this is all i can tell but you should ask around you a good people ...
Dont worry if he killed himself in its christianity, you are not the reason coz, killing ourself has no reason in front of all. and you wont be guilty for it...
!!! *** Internet is not the good source for learning and practising islam ** !!!
Tell him to visit the local mosque and meet some good scholars of isalm..
if he is lazy of doing it then he is not intened to change but just one reason as i mention before. so forget him and ask your parents to find a good husband how is willing to do everything for you.. and this will always keep you happy if you go through you parents..
All the wish for you life
dont thing that i am scholar or something..
you are mature and can make decision by yourself but always rem Islam shows every thing which is called Sharait,.