Being In Love At A Young Age, As A Muslim, In the UK
Muslim students at a faith class at Manchester Islamic HIgh School for Girls. Photograph: Don McPhee
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Asalamualaikum,
I am a muslim boy, who is 15/16 years of age, I am living In the UK. I am a good Muslim who reads Salah, and I am also learning the Quran by heart.
At the moment I am in Year 11, which is the last year of Secondary/High School.. I have had very strong feelings for a girl in my class, she is also a good Muslim. I have had these feelings for nearly two years.
I seriously do not know what to do as i am in a very frustrating and confusing situation. Please could you give me the best answer possible to this situation.
Most girls and boys at my school inlcuding Muslims, have boyfriends and girlfriends. i am not that sort of person, but i have feelings for only this ONE person.
Jazakallah, please reply to this matter.
- c7upt
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asalamu alaikum,
you are still young there will be more chances in life, for now concentrate in your exams and practising islam.
you currently learning the Quran by heart mashallah thats very good.
ma salama
these feelings are unreal in this age i am 20 years old and i've changed ,y class many times every class i go i find a girl to have feelings for her when i change to another class i find another girl to have feelings for. so just try to live your life normal and keep on your religion and try to get married if you can afford.
Ask experienced and do not ask a wise
Assalaamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu.
First of all, let me say that I commend you for being honest about your feelings and also for not acting on them. It is very natural and normal to be attracted to and develop feelings for someone at your age. That is how Allah has made us, and it is what causes us to marry and create new family units. If you have good intentions toward this girl, in that you care about her and want what is good for her and to keep Allah happy with both of you, then do NOT disclose your feelings to her. However, if you believe you have true feelings for her, you might consider marriage. I know you are young, but not too young for this topic. Discuss this with your father or mother. Have a serious discussion with them and explain the qualities that you like about this girl (including her good Islamic manners, her kindness to others, her beauty... or whatever is the case in this situation). Ask them what plans they had in mind for you concerning what age you should marry and what kind of girl they want for you. If you have overwhelmingly strong feelings for this girl, you might point out to your parents that marriage was provided to us from Allah to keep us out of sin. You could have the option of marrying and continuing school while you and your wife lived with your parents, if they were agreeable. My father had friends who did this when they were both 14- got married, lived in his family's home, and continued right on successfully through school and their university. Or you could at least have your parents present this idea to her parents. If this girl and her family agreed and you did your engagement, or did your nikkah (marriage contract) without immediately consumating the marriage, then these options would allow you the freedom to at least discuss these feelings with her and prepare you for a life together in the future.
If you feel like marriage is too big a step for you and you are not ready, then what you need to do instead is to master your feelings. Our Prophet (peace be upon him) recommended that young men who can't marry should fast in order to weaken and subdue their feelings toward women. This is excellent advice and easy to practice. Also, just from a practical standpoint, you should try to avoid being around this girl, and try to keep your mind from lingering on thoughts of her. I realize that this is incredibly difficult, but it is not impossible.
Lastly, go to Allah with a sincere heart. Make a prayer of istikhara and ask for guidance. Ask Allah to provide a way for you to express your love appropriately (through a marriage proposal) or else to provide you a way to overcome these feelings.
May Allah reward you and keep you on the straight path and grant you success in this life and the next, my little brother.
I got the answer for my question thanks for the people who published this paper
In the name of Allah, if you really have fellings for her you for sure have to get to know her more. I mean, you are a muslim, in islam you judge a girl by their personality the whole point of hijab. And about the practicing islam, keep it up.