Can Marriage Qadr be changed?
Salaams,
I would like to submit one of my friend's story who is suffering for a solution regarding her life partner.
She is an 18 year old girl who loved a guy for about 3 years. Suddenly the boy disliked her and changed his mind. Because of his family, the boy was fine after the break up, but the girl was still dropping blood through her eyes, who still can't forget him; she suffers a lot, she can't agree with any other proposals as she is in need of him so much.
All the time she prays Allah to give him as her life partner, and she makes dua for him for his problems, because she sincerely loves him. I too wish for her to lead a peaceful life with her ex boy friend, whom she is preferring as her husband for the sake of loving him.
The question she asked was that she has heard that there is a concept of qadr which cannot be changed even through dua, and that Allah has written the life partners already which cannot be changed??? She prefers that can she change her life partner if Allah has written a person for her who isn't the one she loved.
Can she gain her boyfriend as her husband even he is not written in her qadr??? Please colleagues, lend me your answers as soon as possible, because even I cannot find a solution for her question so I need your help.
-nazza
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Assalamu Alaykum
'the pen has been raised and the ink is dry' so going by this what you are asking for is not possible. What ever happens in our lives had already been decreed by Allah azawajal and what is to happen(future) had been written from lauyin mahfuz( while in the womb). And yes duas cannot change qadr nor makes things happen earlier rather dua helps to moderate situitions and also serves as a source of aid in akhira in sha Allah . I'll advice u leave everything in the hands of Allah and let the misery unfold itself . Verily Allah knows what's best for you and you don't.
Assalamualaikum...
Dua'a can surely change our destiny (Qadr), although it's already written. Our Great Prophet Muhammad (SM) once said, "Nothing can change your destiny (Qadr) except dua'a". Allah Ta'ala will surely change our destiny if we have faith on Allah The Most High and on our Dua'as. And Allah knows well.
Allah hafiz.
Asalam u alikum sister.
Maybe you wrote it by mistake idk..
But your are wrong in your opinion as Prophet (PBUH) said
Nothing can change the Divine decree except dua”. [Musnad Ahmad, 5/677; Ibn Majah, 90; Jami` Al-Tirmidhi, 139.
ALLAH knows well
Assalamu'alaikum,
Qadr is something in Allah's Control and He Asked the Pen to write what He Knew would happen.
`Abdul-Wâhid bin Sulaim narrated: ``I arrived in Makkah and met `Atâ' bin Abi Rabâh. I said to him: ‘O Abu Muhammad! The people of Al-Basrah speak about Al-Qadar .’ He said: ‘O my son! Do you recite the Qur'ân?' I said: `Yes.' He said: `Then recite Az-Zukhruf to me .’’’ He said: ``So I recited: Ha Mim. By the manifest Book. Verily, We have made it a Qur'ân in Arabic that you may be able to understand. And verily, it is in the Mother of the Book with Us, indeed exalted, full of wisdom. Then he said: `Do you know what the Mother of the Book is?' I said: `Allâh and His Messenger know better.' He said: `It is a book that Allâh wrote before He created the Heavens, and before He created the earth. In it, it is (written): Fir`awn is among the inhabitants of the Fire, and in it is: Perish the two hands of Abu Lahab, and perish he! ’(1) `Atâ' said: ‘I met Al-Walid the son of `Ubâdah bin As-Sâmit the Companion of the Messenger of Allâh ﺻﻠﻰ اﻟﻠﻪ ﻋﻠﻴﻪ ﻭﺳﻠﻢ and asked him: ``What was your father's admonition when he died?'' He said: ``He called me and said: ‘O my son! Have Taqwâ of Allâh, and know that you will never have Taqwâ of Allâh until you believe in Allâh, and you believe in Al-Qadar -- all of it -- its good and its bad. If you die upon other than this you shall enter the Fire. Indeed I heard the Messenger of Allâh ﺻﻠﻰ اﻟﻠﻪ ﻋﻠﻴﻪ ﻭﺳﻠﻢ saying: ``Verily the first of what Allâh created was the Pen. So He said: `Write.' It said: `What shall I write?' He said: `Write Al-Qadar , what it is, and what shall be, until the end.''' ( Hasan - Tirmidhee )
According to a hadith in Sahih Muslim, Rasoolullah Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said:
My Lord said: ‘O Muhammad, when I decree something it cannot be altered.
Yet, there is the hadith:
"Nothing could change the Qadar except Du`a’." (Musnad Ahmad)
There are types of Qadr apart from Lawh al Mahfoodh.
Quote: Ibn Taymiyyah and Ibn Qayyim stressed that the taqdeer in the preserved tablet is a general and comprehensive one that covers everything, while the other levels of taqdeer are special details for the taqdeer of the preserved tablet (Ibn Taymiyah: Aqeedah Waasitiyah)
The writing in the preserved tablet is not subject to any change whatsoever because it is based upon Allahs Knowledge (i.e. the one written 50,000 years before the creation of the Heavens and the earth). However changes may occur in the other taqdeers , but these changes are also recorded in the preserved tablet. (quote from salafipublications)
If Allah Changes Qadr, then this change is also recorded in the book: al Lawh al Mahfoodh. Allah Knows what will happen in advance. So, whether your friend will marry this person or someone else, He Has already written and that won't be changed. If she will marry this man, that is already written in the book.
Your friend can make du'a to Allah to turn his heart toward her (if he is good for her, that is). But she must make sure that she stays within her shar'i limits.
Abu Abdul Bari
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Salam Sis
Qadr can change through Dua, and if it does, then it was in your Qadr for it change, however Allah the AlMighty to bring you closer to him puts you through test to bring you closer to him. every day Qadr changes every day mostly due to dua. Taqdeer does not change however you don not know what is in your Qadr. So whatever your working for might be in your taqdeer, that's why you should never lose hope in Allah, However when it comes to hearts, Allahualum. what i mean by this if this girl loves this guy that much then let him know, he might wake up to the fact no one will ever love him like this or this much. Some people need to know some see it them self's some need more convincing.
Hence Trust Allah but tie your camel. Somethings take much harder work,
Salam
Azeem
Assalamualaikum Dear sister,
im a Hindu guy n im believe in ALLAH and islam. even im also pass from such type of way but still i have hope on ALLAH so one day she will definitely gain me. n i suggest her (to your friend) believe on ALLAH one day definitely he will also gain to u,
ALLAH-HA-FIZ
Salam alikom .
Honestly I'm little bit upset .
What's wrong with us ? We run to a Haram relatios and after breaking up we back to Allah and ask him to heal us and bring us our ex bf or gf .
Why don't we remember Allah before going in a Haram relations ?
Allah is not our love sponsor . Please respect Allah for your own success in this life and the next .
We all know that there is Qada and Qadar . And everyone have his partner already written . So why we run after Haram relations ? Don't we trust Allah ?
I think she is suffering and she wI'll suffer more because she loved the wrong person . She didn't trust Allah and she chose to have her own partner by her self and this is the result . If she trusted Allah and be patient Allah will bring her the correct partner to her house door with halal way and marry her.
Tell her to pray for forgiveness not for her ex bf . Is this all we want from Allah ? We only want our Haram relations back ? We want from Allah our ex bf and gf ? Is that all ?
What about janah ? Anyone still remember it ?
It's so shame to ask this kind of things from Allah .
Allah feel jealousy when one of his slaves ( Muslims ) love an other one more than him . Love Allah and not by saying I love you Allah . No it's by doing what he said .
When we do that we will get all we wants even without asking . Allah know us more than we know eachothers .
Anyway . If her ( Ex bf ) is her Qadr so they will marry so tell her to no need for being sad because of her ex bf .
Tell her to be sad for her own sins . The right post had to be (can Allah forgive us ).
Love the way he said Allah know
Us more than we know each other or ourselves that's beautiful
Salam alikom
I have proposed a girl to marry. She agreed and after that our relationship started and we started to love each other.As we are student studying in the same university, we agreed on a matter that after entering a job, she will tell her family about our relationship .But her family don't like same age relationship.so we decided, if they don't agree on our relationship,then we will marry by ourselves .
In summer vacation, she went her house and a marriage proposal came for her.
Her parents and the proposal party forced her to get agree on marriage .They even tortured her to get agree on the proposal.She even tried to escape from her family but can't handle it.
My family also give the proposal to her family but the girls mother willingly make misunderstanding between us.The girls mother said to me that the girl is not agreed to marry me and to her daughter - I am not agreed to marry her.
So,the girl lost the hope and on the face of intense pressure from family ,in opposition to her wish ,she married the boy.
But still I believe that as I was honest, Allah will give back the girl to me.
Is this kind of thinking is right ????
Please help.....
Really gud advice brother. ..I was thinkng the same way....May Allah forgive us all
Khaled.u make very very valid points about her haram relationships and selfishness etc.
Very true.
But u musnt ever say things like Allah feels jealousy when we love others more than him .astagfirallah.allah swt the most kind and merciful and praiseworthy does not need any of our love but we are the destitute ungrateful beggars and slaves who need his love .
If he was written then nothing in the world can take him away from you. Not even if you tried to run.
Assalamu'alaikum,
i would suggest move on, there is always phase of life where you get hurt.
the total lesson of life itself is "Nothing Remains forever"
we are on Trip or vacation on earth life. but its not real one its not permanent.
however this trip will have some results.
the girl is upset because only Allah can fix her problems.Practically there is no such thing called breaking heart but its a EGO of mankind. just get over it.
Decree or Qadr is complicated subject . this is pre-calculated observation by the Allah.
He has given us free will to choose our path , we humans make choices on time frame, Allah has control over time frame so HE already knows what we will choose. so that is written in Loh-Al-mehfuze .
for example our life is like a movie, but we cannot do forward time to see what happens in future , but Allah knows.
Assalamalekom I want to ask something actually I did istikhara for someone else...
shanaya, normally I would ask you to register and submit your question as a separate post (in English), but we do not publish questions about istikhara anymore in any case, as we have answered so many of them.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Yes But 've seen many situation men divorced woman and she get married somewhere give birth ti some children again the marriage broke down she finish the time given for iddah and comeback remarry with the ex .how do u caĺl this.so never.lose only pray if he is good for you.ur feature ur seen religion etc.Let Allah make choice that is khair for u thank you
Abba, you have seen this many times? I doubt it. It might happen on rare occasions due to the circumstances of life. But it's not something someone can plan for or count on. What if the second marriage does not break down but continues the whole life? We must choose from what is halal and present in front of us, not from some fantasy that might or might not come true.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Dua is a weapon of momin and it can change one's destiny but just put your believe on allah