Islamic marriage advice and family advice

A Convert Without a Wali

Who can be my Wali?

Assalamu alaykum wa rahmatullah

I converted to Islam just over two years ago.  No one in my family is Muslim; they are all either Christian or agnostic.

A few months after I converted, I met a Muslim male on an online matchmaking service.  We’ve come to know each other very well and have decided to marry inshallah.  Both of us have decided we want as halaal a marriage as possible.

However, because I am a convert I don’t have any male relatives to serve as a wali in the nikkah.  Who could I turn to to serve as my wali?  There is a Muslim male who has served as my mentor, and I know he would be happy to serve as my wali.  But who would be better: him or somebody else, such as an Imam?

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5 Responses »

  1. Salaam my Sister,

    It is widely accepted that a non-Muslim cannot be a Wali for a Muslim as the role of Wali is to check out the person in respect of their suitability for marriage and Islamic values, checking references, making sure they are a good, observant Muslim and so on. In replacement for this, you may appoint an upstanding Muslim person in the community who has responsibility and knowledge of Islamic affairs, so an Islamic teacher, an Imam, and people such as this should suffice.



  2. Assalamu alaikum Sister,

    As sister Leyla stated, your Wali must to be Muslim. You mentioned that there is a brother who has served as a mentor to you? If you trust him, and you know that he has your best interest in mind then it's ok to ask him. Make sure that he is well grounded in Islam. If he is not then ask your Imam.

    It's very important that your Wali check his references and if he lives in the same country have him come to meet you and your Wali. If he really want's to marry you then he will spend the money and time to come see you. Remember, this is an interview. You want him in front of you and your wali when he is being asked questions. You can check out his eyes and body language when he being questioned about his intentions.

    I hope that helped.

    Your Brother in Islam

    Abdul Wali Carter

  3. salaam
    if you can email me, its regarding a very serious matter and situation i am in about a nikah

  4. i believe you have a wrong understanding of a Walii.

    Walii is your Guardian. For a Muslim Bride, her Walii is her father, in his absence we follow the paternal side : Grandfather > Brother > paternal uncle > paternal cousin brother and if he has no Walii - the Kadhi / Chief Leader of the Muslim Society in the Area.

    For a revert, she has no Walii in her family unless one of her siblings (brothers) converts or someone in her father's side reverts. since she has no Walii in her family - the Kadhi / Chief Leader of the Muslim Society in the Area. Imams are leaders but for Walii they don't qualify as it only the Kadhi who has that authority as per islamic shariah.

    Friends cannot act as Walii as well.

    I hope that helped.

    Your Brother in Islam


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