Islamic marriage advice and family advice

My husband will not kiss me

Zipped lipsSalam..

I have been married for 1 year and a half.. and my husband never wants to kiss me ...

i dont know why we love each other n are fine in all other parts of life its just kissing.. he never wants to kiss me anywhere.

I dont now what am supposed to do??

-mariam85


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9 Responses »

  1. Salaam,

    I am sorry if this is no quick fix, but I believe the only thing to do is to talk to him. I know it's not easy, we are insecure when talking about intimate matters, but I think there's really no other way.

    Telling your husband you love him, and long for him to kiss you, is really something he should cherish. Try telling him about it as a positive thing, that it's because you love him so much and long to have the physical bond with him, try to avoid giving him feelings of guilt or being inadequate. Simply say he's attractive and you want to kiss him because he is your beloved husband.

    Be prepared to listen to what he has to say, be prepared to help him.

    I will make duaa for you and your husband.

  2. Dear Sister,

    I would suggest you tell him that the Prophet (Salla Allahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) used to kiss his wife too.

    The Prophet salallahu alaihi wasallam would kiss his wife regularly. Even when he salallahu alaihi wasallam would be fasting, he would kiss his wife.

    It has been reported through various ahadith that Prophet Muhammad (Salla Allahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) did hug and kiss his wife while fasting.
    ‘Aisha رضی اللہ عنھا reported: Allah’s Messenger ﷺ used to kiss (his wives) while fasting and embraced (them) while fasting; but he had the greatest mastery over his desire among you. - [Muslim Book 6, #2439]

    Also make lots of dua.

    Maybe he feels something when he kisses or he has some other issues. Try and be friendly with him and make him to open up his feelings. And when he is in a good mood ask him about his issues with kissing.

    May Allah bless your marriage.

  3. Salam sis
    I'm really sorry to hear that about your husband, it's kind of weird though.
    I suggest you ask him straight out why is it he won't kiss you and yet in other departments his secure.
    You are husband and wife and you have the right to an explanation, maybe his not a good kisser! Or maybe his mouth smells or perhaps his mouth is sore,whatever the problem you need to get to the bottom of it, full stop!
    I would have thought kissing was more normal than other things we do to please our partners.
    This is an unusual behaviour and maybe you both need to go to a an marriage sex guidance expert as it is annoying and not right.

  4. That's so strange. Have you ever asked him why?

  5. Does he accept /or allow you to kiss him?

  6. Salam alaikum sister,

    I agree, it's very strange. The best answer would be to ask him why.

    Possible answers: 1) its too western or 2) he might be ultra sensative about what he puts around his mouth. If it's the first answer, then you are out of luck trying to get a kiss! You might want to find a different method of intimacy to satisfy your need. If it's the second answer, then at least you have a chance! You could show him that you are fresh and clean after just coming out of shower and brushing your teeth, so he will know his mouth is touching something completely clean.

    Also, what happens when you kiss him? Is he still shy and getting used to marriage, or is he lazy and just doesn't feel like giving back kisses?! Very strange indeed.

    Hope I could help,
    Shereen

  7. Sister I am sorry to hear your situation, it is quite strange but, i think you need to have a conversation with your husband to find and out his reasoning and take it from there really, I don't think its fair for us to speculate on why until you have had that conversation,

    I hope you can resolve this matter with your hubby!!!

    take care sis

    xx

  8. OP: he never wants to kiss me anywhere.

    Some people may not like tongue kissing or kissing anywhere you expect them to.........

  9. did you ask him why? May be he is ashamed of bad breath

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